Favour to me

[crouchendtigerr]

This is how my narc ex sees everything. Apparently. Seeing our children; for weekends is a favour to me
Helping our son with his passport application is a favour to me.
Driving our son to his uni Accomodation is a favour to me
Paying maintenance for his children is not something he should have to do, since he has done all the above as a favour to me
He informed me this weekend.
Incredible

My exH was like this. It's not you, it's a fault in him that he can't put his DC before his negativity towards you. Don't try to rationalise something that will never be rational, try instead to write all communication from their perspective, e.g. Jack needs X to do Y, has asked if you can help him? DCs keen to see you, can they see you next weekend?
Don't reply to anything that is a 'dig' (that isn't a question).
Try to step back from communication as your DC move to adulthood.

You're right. I'm so glad the children are growing up. It's just sometimes I have this anger that he behaves this way, never changes and always find his supporters, flying monkeys.
He seems to get away with behaving like a complete ass, has a life, a social life, while I have no-one, he has a new partner. I've never been able to have a life due to his 8n consistent child contact. He has effective and succesfully controlled me and my time. I tried so hard to stop that, but he won
It's been a difficult couple of weeks and I feel a failure.

He doesn't know you as a person anymore and you aren't having to endure living with him. Look at the positives and try to seek ways to build a new life. What are your priorities, new things to try (even with DC in tow)?