Fell pregnant to a one night stand and the father still dosnt know and my baby’s 18 months, do I tell him?? Please give me advice

[Mumto1xx]

Basically, I had been talking to this guy for a few weeks and then had sex with him one time and carried on talking for a few more days then things just fizzled out and never seen him again (I still had him on all social media etc) I had then slept with someone else a week later.
fast forward 6 weeks I found out I was pregnant which was a HUGE shock!! The due dates from the scans kept changing so I never told either of the potential baby dads that I was pregnant. I did announce on my social media that I was 12+ weeks pregnant and her dad (now I know since she was born) had messaged me asking if the baby was his which I said I didn’t know but i don’t think so, as I was scared and had in my head that I was going to do the pregnancy alone which was fine as a baby is a blessing no matter what.
From then until now which my baby is now 18 months I haven’t heard or seen from him as he had deleted me off social media a few months later (he must of thought I knew who her dad was as I hadn’t been in touch)
My baby is now starting to talk and is saying “dadda” a lot as heard from the TV, her cousins etc I know that soon enough she is going to start asking me if she has a dad or where her dad is and I just don’t know how to answer it and I feel so so guilty as I wouldn’t have a answer as I’ve never even told him he has a child and my mind keeps telling me to reach out to her dad and tell him he has a 18 month old BUT HOW DO I DO IT? WHAT DO I SAY TO HIM?

Either way I’m scared if he does or dosnt want to be in her life, im scared of him saying he dosnt want anything to do with her or just blocking me straight away as what would I tell her when she’s older but then I’m scared if he does want to be in her life for her to meet him as he’s a complete stranger to her and I don’t know any of his family or what they are like?
my mind will not rest at all lately and I know it never will as it is getting harder and harder until I say something but I’m just so scared either way.
please please help, give me some advice or what to even say to him ?

I’m sorry if I have missed this but how do you know he is the father?

He already knows you were pregnant and asked if he was the father and you said you didn’t know.

Surely the next step is to ask him for a paternity test so you can find out for sure?

Edit:

I have edited because I have just seen a second page to your thread which somehow I missed the first time around 😂 The skin colour does help clear matters up from your end but he may still request a DNA test anyway.

I suppose he will want to know why you kept this from him for so long so make sure you have an answer ready for that.

I hope you get the outcome you want for your daughter.

@2024BigWhoop that's what I thought OP initially said too... she told the other guy she didn't know!. OP needs to offer to do a DNA test on approaching speaking to the father. I mean imagine someone telling you, almost 2 years later you are a dad. OP can't just go on skin colour he obviously would think there's many men the same race as him!

Please ignore snippets complicating matters. In the kindest possible way you don't sound very switched on so better not let those kind of thing cause more confusion.

Almost any man would withdraw upon being told directly 'no, this is not your baby' under these circumstances. He would take your word for it and move on after a brief fling and want to move on, not keep pushing and risk a restraining order. He has done nothing wrong in leaving things be.

Nobody is going to force you to leave your baby overnight with a stranger. If contact is established this will need to be at an appropriate pace. Don't hold back based on this comment.

When I say 'anything could happen ' I don't mean to scaremonger but it could. Unexpected illness, say. It's better your child has its father established now than putting it off until some unspecified date in case he is needed more than expected.

Please do some reading on your child's heritage. You really can't be thinking of a baby as 'half caste'.