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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

Annoying things as a single parent

71 replies

Happycat1212 · 25/04/2021 23:54

Does anyone else find things annoying as a single parent! I want to swap rooms with my daughter as she's never liked her bedroom but as a single parent it's going to be extremely difficult moving all my furniture into her room on my own, including my 3 door wardrobe which I doubt I can manage alone Sad just frustrating having no one around to help so probably going to have to leave things as they are.

OP posts:
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FortunesFave · 26/04/2021 01:34

Nobody to ask to help? I've moved some shockingly big bits of furniture but I slid them onto towels...we have hard floors with no carpet...and then sort of shoved them along and they slide on the towels.

krikey · 26/04/2021 01:35

@FortunesFave

Nobody to ask to help? I've moved some shockingly big bits of furniture but I slid them onto towels...we have hard floors with no carpet...and then sort of shoved them along and they slide on the towels.
Same here 😂 Before I me my DP I just 'managed' somehow and did it myself.
Happycat1212 · 26/04/2021 08:06

No no one to ask, it’s a mirrored wardrobe so it’s pretty heavy! If I tried to move it I would probably end up breaking it. Ah well just one of the little niggles of being alone

OP posts:
UhtredRagnarson · 26/04/2021 08:12

Leave the wardrobe in the room and let your daughter have half and you keep some of your stuff in the other half and the rest in the wardrobe that’s currently in her room.

fruitcakeflydude · 26/04/2021 08:15

Take the doors off the wardrobe first ?

Or wait till you can have a friend round

RedFrogsRule · 26/04/2021 08:17

Annoying things 1...being ill in an incapacitating way (severe d&v or horrendous flu) and still having children to care for, meals to make etc.

Annoying things 2...a financial or domestic emergency with no back up. E.g. major financial expense (new boiler) and no one else to help make decisions, share the worry or help

Annoying things 3.... people thinking their husband or partner being absent for a % of the week is the same as not having anyone ever

RedFrogsRule · 26/04/2021 08:18

As for the wardrobe, yes doors off and some sort of slippy surface underneath?

Itsabeautifulday81 · 26/04/2021 08:19

I spend a fortune on handymen!

RedFrogsRule · 26/04/2021 08:19

I’m now married and if ever a single parent posted needing help shifting a wardrobe or another issue I’d be first to volunteer having been there. Do you have a neighbour’s group you can ask on. Don’t be afraid to ask

UhtredRagnarson · 26/04/2021 08:20

Yes you could put a post on local FB groups asking if anyone could lend a hand.

Doyoumind · 26/04/2021 08:22

Not being able to just pop to the shop when you urgently need something without taking DC with you and being locked in the house once they are in bed.

Not being able to do exercise outside the home unless it involves your DC.

Having to think about and do absolutely everything yourself.

creaturcomforts · 26/04/2021 08:25

Yes, not being able to drive and having to pay extra to have old furniture taken away or for online grocery delivery fees.

As for moving heavy items, I've realised that I had pretty much done everything around the house before husband left and its not really any different.

It is hard work, but there's usually a work around and I've been known to ask family when they're around would you mind just helping me with?... I know I'm annoying!

UhtredRagnarson · 26/04/2021 08:27

Friends not getting it.

Would I like to go to sunrise yoga on the beach? Fuck yeah! I’d love to. Can I? No because my children need someone to look after them at 7am.

creaturcomforts · 26/04/2021 08:31

Yes as pp said maybe the hardest thing is not having a backup and not being able to be spontaneous

Happycat1212 · 26/04/2021 08:50

Yep can relate to all of these, The popping to the shop, If I have to go to the shop I have to drag all 4 kids with me as none old enough to leave alone. The illness and having no one to help is probably the worst though. Usually I just get on with things, I’ve laid all my carpets myself (couldn’t afford to pay anyone) built all the furniture except for this wardrobe 😩 I will have to find a way!

OP posts:
HairyFeline · 26/04/2021 08:56

I find it very irritating when queuing solo at a cafe and people behind me come in, queue, and their companion goes and claims a table. Grrrrr!!!!

paintedpanda · 26/04/2021 09:07

When I was a single parent, I once said I would love to go to the gym but I just don't have time, and got told "just get up earlier and go before work!".
Yes, cracking idea, and who will watch my (at the time, very young) children whilst I am at the gym at 6am??
"Oh, yeah, I guess I didn't think of that".

It's a very frustrating time, when your kids are too young to leave alone and there's no one around to help. You have my sympathies

UhtredRagnarson · 26/04/2021 09:11

People don’t realise how much it ties you to the house when you are a lone parent.

UhtredRagnarson · 26/04/2021 09:11

It’s extremely isolating.

lollipoprainbow · 27/04/2021 07:58

Not being able to pop into town or whatever, my dd hates shopping and always moans if I take her!!

indiakulfi · 27/04/2021 08:07

No hugs
Going through any problems alone

dancinfeet · 27/04/2021 08:16

Having to do the job of two parents if your ex doesn't want to do their share. Being fully financially responsible for every single thing for the kids when ex chooses to pay a pittance for maintenance and constantly juggling finances just to keep afloat.

When they were smaller, having to take the kids to the shops when they were too young, and not being able to have a hobby for myself because all of my free time is taken up with either work or trying to keep on top of housework. Having to pay adult price for a child on holidays abroad, because kids are only free with two full paying adults. Family saver tickets for 4 into attractions, and the tickets for 3 of us almost costing the same.

UhtredRagnarson · 27/04/2021 08:38

I’ve been a lone parent for almost 16 years and I’m only now realising just how much mental energy it took when they were small just to keep us all fed and not feral. I’m at a stage now where I have free time to myself and I am able to do so much around the house, DIY that’s long over dues, deep cleaning, decluttering etc, and it dawned on me that this is why this stuff never got done before. I literally didn’t not have it in me to tackle these things because I was parenting small children entirely alone. I always felt so guilty about not being able to keep the house pristine. I’ve beaten myself up for years over it but now I see that I physically just couldn’t.

DDIJ · 27/04/2021 08:46

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megletthesecond · 27/04/2021 08:52

I spend a fortune on handymen too. I paid a removal company to pop round when I had to swap rooms and heavy beds.

Thank you DDIJ it IS so hard to build a support network as a working LP. Never helped by my DD's behaviour.

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