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12 replies

BabyBoo777 · 23/12/2020 19:29

My abusive ex is still trying to control me and my children. He has bought my 8 and 10 year old iPhones with Microsoft Parenting controls enabled, which means he can track our location using their phones. While it’s possible to leave the phones behind, it’s not always easy to have that explain why to my children. Are there any legalities that would either allow me to turn off this function or get me added to it, so we’re on equal footings? It would be reassuring for when my daughter starts secondary school next year.

OP posts:
user1471528245 · 23/12/2020 19:39

Not seen this on an iPhone however this is an app like any other and can be uninstalled however this should be password protected to stop the clever kids removing it, just try doing a normal uninstall if you cannot it mean he set the password in which case you won’t be able to alter any setting or remove, or add yourself without the password, your other issue is if you are able to remove or switch it off he’ll know, your best option is to buy them a separate phone for when they leave the house, bit extreme, costly though

Avondklok · 23/12/2020 19:45

This would make me furious. I would ask for the password/app to be removed or refuse the use of the phones when with me. They are too young for iPhones anyway.

BabyBoo777 · 23/12/2020 20:00

He’s a really nasty piece of work and bought these against my wishes. Sadly, he’s left me financially vulnerable so I can’t afford to buy them alternative phones and my eldest finds it useful for walking to school by herself.

OP posts:
BabyBoo777 · 23/12/2020 20:05

@user1471528245

Not seen this on an iPhone however this is an app like any other and can be uninstalled however this should be password protected to stop the clever kids removing it, just try doing a normal uninstall if you cannot it mean he set the password in which case you won’t be able to alter any setting or remove, or add yourself without the password, your other issue is if you are able to remove or switch it off he’ll know, your best option is to buy them a separate phone for when they leave the house, bit extreme, costly though
Unfortunately not that simple. It’s like a secondary user on his account so I have no way of turning on/off anything. It’s stifling. He’s abused me financially as well, so I can’t afford to buy another phone.
OP posts:
DecemberStar · 24/12/2020 00:04

Try contacting Women's Aid, they have expertise in combatting digital stalking etc. Think there's stuff on their website too.

But it could be yr only option is to get yr DD a new phone somehow. But of course she'll be expecting iPhone standard now.....

The sort of thing my ex would do were he technically minded.

MagicalThinking · 24/12/2020 00:16

Could you do a factory reset of the phones to wipe everything?

BewareTheBeardedFatMan · 24/12/2020 00:18

Just coming along to say do a factory reset. Any photos etc will be lost but you can back up first I think.

BabyBoo777 · 24/12/2020 07:59

Thanks

OP posts:
defendervank · 07/01/2021 14:13

That's put you in an awkward position op. Are these new phones with contracts/data plans? I had a similar problem with tablets. I don't know much about apple products but maybe with Wifi, mobile and bluetooth turned off it'll be harder or even not able to be tracked. I know this is the case with my sons android phone. Not that I track it but i noticed it came up on my maps when I knew he was somewhere else.

BabyBoo777 · 07/01/2021 15:36

Yes they’re in contract. I don’t know if turning all that lot off will help as he will have find just phone enabled.

OP posts:
nighttimetalk · 07/01/2021 17:32

Can you not reset the phone back to factory setting then make new accounts

cracracatlady · 07/01/2021 17:53

Just rest the phone to factory settings every time the kids return from their dads? Then He will have to reinstall

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