Giving you money for your lifestyle!

[Hullabalooo]

Had message from EA ex this week saying that he was a self made man and that i was being propped up by him and state and sick of paying for my lifestyle.

I haven't been with him for a few years so he has no idea about my income. I actually work full time and just about manage but without his fairly low contribution it would be difficult. However I'm main parent and do the bulk of everything.

I'm really hurt by message and that he can't see that it's not money for me but for dc. It's really upset me and although there's no point responding I feel really grubby for receiving it. Is he right or is he just been horrible and clueless?

I sort of know he's being unreasonable but it's really affected me emotionally.

Just say ' Thank You Kind Sir'

Just say , "Fuck Off."

"As someone other than you covers more than half your child's housing, clothing and feeding costs, it is your lifestyle that is being propped up by me/the state. If you were the sole parent of [child's name], it would cost you much more and limit your work hours."

This one is super easy. You ignore the message and don't respond. For god sake, don't be drawn into text tennis over something like this. Designed to bait you... don't let it. Have a little chuckle and delete it

I would send a laughing emoji hand state how £x per month is a bargain for 24/7 childcare and all child related costs...

In reality I agree to ignore!

I would normal,y ignore, but I think in this case he needs to know he’s out of order.

I would go with Random’s post along the lines of “£x for half the costs of (child) and 24/7 childcare so you have complete Freedom is a pittance and you should be ashamed. I don’t expect this sort of message again”.

He doesn't need to know though. He already knows.

The op shouldn't walk nicely into this little trap he's kindly set out for her. That way madness lies. The only way to deal with these men is to play them at their own game and in this instance it's a cold, hard, dead BLANK. Let no answer be his answer. It would be foolish indeed to get embroiled in trying to 'defend' her position. Mentally fuck him off and put your phone down

Rise above his nonsense and ignore it.

Thanks for the support all. I'll ignore it. Much as it pains me to do so.

He's taking me to court so I imagine he's itching for a snarky response to help his case. Still smarts though.

This man calls himself a feminist. Ha!

I do like your response though @ordinarysnowflake

I’m so sorry he’s such an idiot. My sons father is exactly the same. As much as I want to justify myself, I just chose to ignore because my ex is a narcissistic control freak who loves to create drama. There is absolutely no point in having a conversation with him or trying to justify myself. It just fuels more heat. Very sorry you have to hear that but you know your money goes towards your children and that’s ultimately all that matters!!! Very frustrating though!

Thanks. Sorry to hear you've been through similar. So challenging. God knows what he says to dc. Only another 14 years you go!