How do I get ex to see kids?

[donnalouise1977]

Hi everyone,

This is my 1st post. Split from my ex 2 years ago. Lived together until June this year due to him refusing to let me buy him out. Eventually he did.

I have a 9 year old and 4 year old. 9 year old accepts everything that's happened and is very grounded. 4 year old who I thought would be unaffected is extremely troubled. Huge tantrums, separation anxiety, you name it.

Ex has not paid any maintenance, CMA are moving to collect and pay. Ex won't give me any notice on when he sees the children. Expecting me to change my plans.

How do I make him realise the kids need routine and consistency? I ask him for dates and times and get nothing. Just a text the night before.

We failed mediation as he refused to let me buy him out. I don't want to spend thousands on court. I'd be quite happy for them never to see him again but I know that's not good for them.

I would personally not contact him at all let him contact you but its on ur terms i e meet at a play park or an activity so u r all comfortable.. alao i know it feels like u should be pushing this but dont you will only be disappointed when it doesnt happen.. and then the kids know too.. please just concentrate on you and ur children dont worry whats happening with ur ex . Pushing them together can go wrong good luck x

Just refuse contact so he has to take you to court...

Well I would offer him EOW and not rearrange when he doesn't accept it, he will have to take it to court to get awarded that same EOW!! You can self rep.

Go grey rock on him, he is game playing and doing it to control you

I would do same as random mess.

You know if he works weekdays.

Do not change plans you are pandering to his whims.