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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

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Original poster

Move your stuff out!

20 replies

Nikitasol · 29/08/2017 05:11

My ex moved out in March. Fair enough he was house sharing for a bit after that but has now moved into his own permanent place, a two bed house.

Loads of his stuff is still here though which is really annoying as I can't get in with sorting the house out till it goes.

Recently I said will you collect your books etc this week. He said he didn't have the space at present. I dropped some post round and to have a nose and it's really empty!

How can I get him to move his stuff? How long did it take your ex to move everything out? It's been tough so I don't want to create more problems but would really like to draw a line under it and move on.

OP posts:

AlphaStation · 29/08/2017 05:41

Is the stuff packed in storage boxes, ready to be moved out? That could help, I guess. I've never experienced this particular problem, but mentioning that the stuff is packed and ready to be shipped on the upcoming week-end, and that you'd be happy to help might be easier, than nagging about him coming over and do the packing in non-existent boxes and then do the moving all by himself. Just a though. I noticed that IKEA has a horrible but cheap storage box for £0.90 under the name of 'Pappis' (which is a play with words meaning both cardboard and daddy, which I find quite fitting in your case ).

lastnightiwenttomanderley · 29/08/2017 05:46

Simple. It's been nearly six months. If he doesn't come and remove it, you'll have to charity shop/skip it.

That should get him moving and is not in any way unreasonable in the circumstances!

If he 'doesn't have space' then this is what storage units are for. It's his problem, not yours.

Original poster

Nikitasol · 29/08/2017 14:05

Thanks. I've done my back in so can't pack it up unfortunately. I'll message him this week about the stuff.

OP posts:

BlackeyedSusan · 30/08/2017 00:47

I was so tempted to post ex's books through his letterbox one by one and see how far I could slide them across the laminate floor....

he still has stuff here in the loft and at the back of a couple of cupboards, he left...... 6 and a half years ago.

take a bag round everytime you drop off his post.

or make him think it is in his best interests to remove the stuff...

(child and crayons and books do not always go well together as at least one of my books has the first page coloured inred wax crayon. )

BackieJerkhart · 30/08/2017 01:01

Tell him he has a well to collect it otherwise it's all going for sale on gumtree.

BackieJerkhart · 30/08/2017 01:01

week

SheRaaarghPrincessOfPower · 30/08/2017 01:10

"since it's been 6 months since this was your home I'll assume it's OK to skip /eBay anything still here. If there's anything in particular you'd like, please collect it by {date}. Thanks"

This got rid of most of his crap in my house. There's still annoying furniture that for some reason is still here. I should just get rid of it. Abusive relationship though.. So, it's hard.

KweenOfFarts · 30/08/2017 01:10

Send some items in post without stamps (try disguise your writing) he will have postie at door or toddle of down sorting office. He will soon collect.

KweenOfFarts · 30/08/2017 01:10

Meant pay postie.

BlessYourCottonSocks · 30/08/2017 01:34

You need to change your wording! Don't ask him 'will you' move your stuff. You need to state 'You need to remove your stuff by (2 week deadline) or I'm afraid I shall donate it to the charity shop. We have split up and I cannot store it any longer. Thanks.

And then bloody do it.

SheRaaarghPrincessOfPower · 30/08/2017 01:37

Not 'I'm afraid i shall donate' that's way too apologetic!

Original poster

Nikitasol · 30/08/2017 19:19

Thanks all. He said he's going to collect stuff with the fortnight. We'll see we'll see. I'd be embarrassed myself if I'd left stuff this long. But there's issues still so guessing maybe there's an element of punishing me too.

He came over to bath DC last night which is first time in house for ages and he opened the cupboard and said 'well you've got a lot of food'. This is the man who gives us £50 a week!

OP posts:

BlessYourCottonSocks · 30/08/2017 21:55

My answer to that piece of crap would have been a raised eyebrow and a 'would you rather we were starving?'...

He's got two weeks. And I would seriously bin it/charity shop it immediately after that. No ifs or buts. He's been warned - and if you don't do it Nikita he will know he can keep taking the piss with you!

Draw your line here.

Original poster

Nikitasol · 30/08/2017 23:33

Fighting words @blessyourcottonsocks I'm seeing him tomo to discuss childcare so will get a date out of him then.

OP posts:

Original poster

Nikitasol · 01/09/2017 22:56

I've said move it all out by the end of September. I think that's fair notice. He better bloody had!

OP posts:

BackieJerkhart · 01/09/2017 23:03

What happened to "within the fortnight"?? Why did you extend what he had already agreed to?

ivykaty44 · 01/09/2017 23:04

Gave date and then boxed and took to charity what he had left behind

ivykaty44 · 01/09/2017 23:05

Don't get a date - give a date

Original poster

Nikitasol · 06/10/2017 16:35

Just to update it all finally went at the end of September. Hooray!

OP posts:

abblie · 06/10/2017 16:42

Out in garden if it's been 6 months it mustn't be that important

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