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Lone parents

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Original poster

working single mums

24 replies

mummyOF4darlings · 13/04/2014 22:15

Do you ever just some days feel like jacking it and going back on benefits ? Im better off in work but my god i am exhausted ive worked 12- 8pm yesterday and the 11 - 6pm today on my feet rushing round like an idiot then come home have 4 kids to sort out and get to bed i am so behind on the house work its a joke, god knows when ill get to do it as determined to get out as much as i can with kids this next 2 days while weve got no school or work.
I am just feeling very tired and bogged down i could cry :(

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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starlight1234 · 13/04/2014 22:45

I am exhausted...We both broke up for the week Friday..Saturday I woke up really ill and lost voice..very frustrating...but no plans to go on benefits...I am better off working and want my DS to have work ethic

UncrushedParsley · 13/04/2014 22:48

Yes, but its worth it to stick at it I think. I only have 1 offspring though, so you have more work at home than me. I think maybe it will get easier as they get older?

giantpurplepeopleeater · 13/04/2014 22:50

Truthfully, I'm lucky enough to have never been on benefits, and the idea scares the hell out of me, so I don't feel like that.

But I am with you on the housework. I have an ironing pile as big as Everest!

antimatter · 13/04/2014 22:51

Yes it is worth it.
I have 2 teenagers and am out of the hous for nearly 11 hours plus on call (from home) every 6 weeks
Everything takes ages to organise and do but I am in charge of my own life and definitely it's worth from career perspective.
I know the tiredness you are talking about.
I am very careful to get enough sleep so I am not falling asleep during my commute back home.

Original poster
mummyOF4darlings · 13/04/2014 22:54

Yes i am happier working than been a sahm just it is tireing feel like ive no life. Im usually in a good routine but i think with it been holidays aswell its messed things up a bit only usually do 4 hour shifts while kids are at school then on a sunday but have changed some shifts to avoid childcare problems.
Its the housework really and come home and the dogs peed all over kitchen floor from not been able to get out think ill have to get a dog sitter as well as a baby sitter :(

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UncrushedParsley · 13/04/2014 22:55

Hang on in there...

giantpurplepeopleeater · 13/04/2014 22:56

The tiredness is a killer. Some days I jack it all in and go to bed when DS does. Sod the housework!!!

Original poster
mummyOF4darlings · 13/04/2014 23:00

I cant even go to bed yet my 2 sons always go to the toilet between 11 and 12 so its easier fr me to stay awake and make sure they get back in bed than them disturb me whilst just nodding off

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Meglet · 13/04/2014 23:01

I'm miserable but at least I'll have a pension. The house is a tip and I struggle to control the DC's .

I wanted to be a SAHM when XP went but resigning meant I wouldn't be entitled to JSA.

Original poster
mummyOF4darlings · 13/04/2014 23:07

It is hard Meglet. I only work p/t i dont think i could manage full time while kids are still young.

Oh i resigned after having eldest dd and went on income support it was the best move at the time but i did end up stuck in a rutt around 7 years a sahm was a killer for me and employers didnt want to know lucky i knew someone who worked where i am now and pulled some strings, my manager cant believe id been out of work so long. I do really enjoy it when im there its the thought of coming home and walking through the door to all the mess and noise

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Monetbyhimself · 13/04/2014 23:13

I'm knackered too Sad Holidays always throw routines a bit awry though. I've just lowered my standards re housework and gardening.
I'd find not working very isolating. I enjoy the adult company.
And I have expensive taste in shoes Grin

Hope things feel brighter soon.

Meglet · 13/04/2014 23:24

Yes, I'm P/T too, 3 days a week.

I've set myself a deadline of summer 15 in my current job. Once I've finished my NVQ I'll job hunt for a term time job.

monet my standards are currently so low I haven't even cleaned DD's scribble off the table today. The good housekeeping threads are like a strange parrallel universe Blush.

Original poster
mummyOF4darlings · 13/04/2014 23:30

I wouldnt mind a term time job ive only ever worked in catering and hospitality places so its all i know, i know could do school kitchen assistant but those hours arent enough

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Paddlingduck · 14/04/2014 08:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Minime85 · 14/04/2014 08:52

its definitely hard that's for sure. feeling exhausted myself and like I run from one thing to the next achieving anything much. my job saved me though when ex left last yr. I honestly believe that.

hope you're feeling brighter soon Thanks

VelmaD · 14/04/2014 16:40

im exhausted. I work 25 hours and study and have the children 6/7 days. Broke up for Easter last Friday, spent all last week ill :-( ive never been out of work, was two days when they were babies and 4/5 days now they're in primary, but I often dream of giving up!

justtoomessy · 14/04/2014 21:03

I work full time in 12 hour shifts including nights but longer including travelling time to drop off and pick up DS and then get back home. Plus not paid for breaks. No contact at all with DS dad so I rarely get a break myself or even get out without DS. I'm shattered, over weight and unfit as never have long enough to myself to actually exercise and I drink vino of a weekend.

It sucks but no way would I be on benefits.

Original poster
mummyOF4darlings · 14/04/2014 22:12

Hiya oh god you know what i think i would love a cleaner, but i am usually a bit better organised when kids are at school thank god. Feeling bit brighter today anyway have had no work so been out with the kids and my friend and her kids, got tomorrow and weds aswell :)

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mary4A · 16/04/2014 11:54

I am planning to go back to work FT, and fear that my salary won't cover all expenses.
Problem is leaving such a young baby (6m) so many hours in day care is too much guilt to carry, and I'm sure i'll strugle very much to keep a healthy baby routine if leaving the office at 5.30, it is unlikly to pick her up before 6pm.
Anyone else in the same situation?

liam12 · 27/04/2014 09:57

I so feel like you , Im on my own with 4 year work and feel like packing it in by time I pay travel my lunch I have hardly anything left

Solasum · 27/04/2014 10:05

Mary, my just turned 4mo is in nursery and has been for a month, this week coming is the last week of just 3 days as I now have to go back full time. He seems to love watching the older children. Be warned though that I had to take 3 days off work in the first three weeks as he picked up every germ going. Might be worth asking work if you can finish earlier then make up time in the evenings to make it more baby friendly? My employer agreed to my leaving the office at 4pm, I was astonished, and very glad I asked.

Loverdose · 02/05/2014 08:34

I have just separated from my H (was a SAHM) and have just taken on an evening job working 7pm-12am. Before having dd I was a legal secretary but there are no jobs of that sort going. The job I have taken on is pretty banal minimum wage stuff, but I don't want to live on benefits. I start next Monday and I think it's going to be pretty tiring!

LineRunner · 02/05/2014 08:38

It is exhausting. It is better now the kids are older, but in the past the place used to be a tip.

Pinkballoon · 02/05/2014 12:52

Tired, but prefer it to when I was a SAHM. I see my working time as 'my time' whereas I never had any time at all to myself when I was at home.

But like a number of other posters here, I put the children to bed, and then just go to bed myself. Whacked.

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