how do i get him to sleep in his own room

[dholmes2014]

hi to anyone with any advice, i am a single parent and have been for six years, my son was born with a club foot and has had many operations to re build his foot, however i have been a bit naughty and let him sleep in my bed then he went into his own room but i have been sleeping in there since the last operation in june last year. when i try to go to sleep in my room he just cries and i go back in as i cant bear listening to him cry. i left it an hour and a half last time before i relented. does anyone have any tips on how to make him feel better going to sleep in his own room? I have tried re decorating his room just to how he likes but still no joy. : (

Is he 6 years old or have I read that wrong?

How about a gradual retreat? My HV recommended the following. Put them into bed, make sure they are snuggly, warm, dry, fed and watered and have something to remind them of you, like a jumper you've been wearing with your smell on it. Explain what will happen and reassure them you love them and then back out. If there are tears, after a minute, go back in and briefly reassure. Back out and shut the door and wait two minutes, then 4, then 8... well you get the idea. The key is reassurance (briefly) then doubling the amount of time. Stick with it, it hurts for you but it does work.

I have similar issues with my DS who is eight

Given the choice he would sleep in my bed every night. I have had to take a pretty hard line to get anywhere.

He gets a star if he sleeps all night in his own bed. I let him choose one weekend night when he gets to sleep in my bed.

Is hard. He still cries but ahi stand firm. Some nights it goes on for ages and I wonder why I bother but feel is best for him in long run.

Good luck
K

he is six, but seven if you were to ask him! lol

thanks for the tips, i think i am going to have to just get some ear plugs and try my hardest at being tough, whenever he cries it takes me back to when he came out of his op and it was heart wrenching. its so tough being a lone parent sometimes as there is no one to help keep you strong! will definitely be giving the gradual and the the star chart a go see if i can mix the both for ultimate results. thanks for replying xx