Xmas arrangements

[Narabug01]

My soon to be ex husband has dictated the days he wants the children over Xmas to fit in with his own festive plans. It is Boxing Day and the day after, then back to me for the weekend, him for 2 days and then he goes off to a News Years party so they come back to me for the afternoon and night, then back to him for the rest of the week and the weekend!

The children are 2 and 6 and I think this arrangement is unacceptable as they will not know if they are coming or going and their routine will be all over the place!

He is getting all alpha male about knowing his rights and wanting to be with his children but this arrangement does not put them first, it only priorities himself.
Any advise?

what are current contact arrangements?
Think very carefully about this as it sets president for the following year too...
Lots of people either split xmas day or take it alternate years.

I agree all the coming and going seems too much for the 2 year old in particular... someone has mentioned before how undemanding some parents seem to be about new years as that is not the fun part...

The kids are priority at christmas

That's far too much coming and going. It just sounds like he's shifting them around to fit in with his plans and not thinking for a moment what would be the best thing for them :(

Hi Star
Current arrangements have been pretty sporadic depending on when he goes away for weekends with his friends/girlfriend. the plan originally was Sundays and morning pick up and take to school and nursery 2 x a week. Now he is demanding every other weekend, but has also announced that he cannot do 2 weekends in Dec as he is going away!!
It is very frustrating as he really thinks he can just demand having them when it suits him.

Devonfolk yes I think it is far too much moving around. It is going to disrupt their sleep for weeks and who will be the one to get them back on track with their routine...yes muggins here!

Why don't you suggest that you have the Christmas Eve until 11am Christmas morning, then he can have them for Christmas lunch through to boxing day. That way you get to open presents but not have the hassle of cooking lunch.

Reverse at New Years so that he has them from New Years Eve through to New Years day (although you may want to make pick up a bit later on New Years day). So you see them on the first day of the New Year, but can spend some time with your friends New Years Eve.