need advice

[cuteboots]

My son was seeing his dad after not seeing him for about 3 years. It was going ok but then he sprang the fact that he may be going to prison? Hes now in court for the next five weeks and being charged with some stuff that I find really awful. I havent spoken to him for 2 weeks and my son is also not phoning him. Hes not fully aware of whats going on but knows that somethings not right. Even if we have fallen out shouldnt he still be talking to his son? Shall I just leave well alone?

If I was unhappy about the cause of the charges I would find it very tempting just to leave it there.
I think this is probably morally wrong, because your ex and his son have a right to spend time together...BUT the effort is your ex's to make and not your responsibility.

I would view it quietly as a probably-just-as-well silver lining, and not push for contact. If you get what I mean?

how old is your son ?

I think you are right and Im going to leave well alone. Its is tough and has been affecting my sons behaviour at school and the other morning he wet himself and hid his pyjamas as he thought I would tell him off!!

cestlavielife- He will be 8 in january

so he is only 8.
you make the decisions.
he is "being charged with some stuff that I find really awful" wait til you know if he will be in prison or not then you can make deicsions about contact.

keep channels of communication with your DS open - talk open ended quesitosn in car of before bed, let him exppress whether he wants to see him or what? does DS know about the court, prison?

cestlavielife- Yes he does know a bit about the court case and the possibility of prison. He has said he doesnt want to see him as it just upsets him as he know hes been lying! : 0 (