Can someone give advice on what i should do about my Daughters dad please

[19111990]

Were do i begin really.

My daughter is 3 in January, her dad did have a good relationship with her untill he went of the rails. He started drinking all the time taking all kinds of drugs he turned violent towards people (not my daughter though). He decided to get him self sorted and went to rehab... I did support him as much as i could, then his mother re-married and he went abit mad again, he hasnt seen our Daughter for 3 months and has rang me 3 time and all them times has been for a argument and nothing to do with our Child.

He randomly phoned up yesterday damanding he was seeing our Daughter, i dont have a problem with that, as long as he is with his mother while she has my Daugher. His mum has her every Monday the reason i dont want him near mine because the last time he was there he started kicking things around while my daughter was there.

Any advice on what i should do? I mean should i let him take her out by himself? or am i right for doing what i doing?

I'd give Womens Aid a ring to see if they can suggest anything. I'd be reluctant to let him see her without setting some ground rules and being able to have a civil conversation with him. You could try mediation, although it costs and there will probably be a wait for it.

Are you on good terms with his mother?

Yes me and his Mother are on good term's.

He still speaks to his mother, thats why i suggest he see's her when she is with his Mother. That way he can see her and i dont have to see him and get into arguments and put the baby in that situation.

If you trust his mother then have him see her at his mothers for now and se how it goes.

Firstly, is he still drinking and taking drugs? If so tell him he can see his DD when he stops. If not, letting him see herwhen his mother is there is a good compromise if you can trust his mother. Best of luck.

solidgoldbrass - He says that he has stopped it all but tbh i am not to sure thats why i would rather him see her while his mother has my Daughter. That way if he turn's up Drunk or Been taking things she will not let him in the house or near our Child.