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Statement of Agreement - WWYD?

27 replies

KittyCatIsGettingFat · 15/02/2011 19:46

XH and I have very recently split up, and we have no money for an expensive contested divorce. We're both keen to keep it amicable - so he says - but what would you all recommend as the correct childcare agreement to put in place?

He wants DD every second week, all week, but as she's only 21mo and have never spent more than three hours away from me I think this is unreasonable... I am proposing that as I am the SAHM I have her MOn-Fri, he has her Sat & Sun - until she goes to school, in which case we'll switch to every second weekend. Is this too much time with him?
I feel I'm compromising but also feel really anxious about DD being away from me for so long, as XH has never been involved in childcare except bathing her every night - I do all the feeds, night wakes, playing, putting down, nappies, etc etc etc...

Help! I'm confused and need advice... Thanks.

OP posts:
rubin · 20/02/2011 21:58

Hi everyone,

Sorry not replied sooner, but been busy with two young children!

I had not doubt my response would fuel fury, but I stand by it.

cestlavielife, I will of course find you the numerous links to the research that I spoke about - just give me some time to collate it.

I find it incredible that it seems rarely uunderstood that the whole issue is about teh children - not about how may days/nights the parents get.

Niceguy2, I absolutely would 't think any different if I was the non resident parent. HWhat's important is how the poor child feels about being pushed from one person to another.

As I've said before there is an extremely misguided thought process here on what is best for the children or indeed what is what eeither parent wants .............

rubin · 20/02/2011 22:00

And apologies for the spelling mistakes - laptop playing up!

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