How was your day today? Come share.

[BellevilleRendezvous]

Evening. I lurk more than I post, but I was thinking that one of the crappy things about being an lp is that there is no-one to ask how your day went each evening (though appreciate some partners might not have asked either!).

So I thought I would start this thread as a place to share the ups and downs of our days. I'll start.

I had a great day with ds (3.4), he was being really helpful and co-operative. I took him swimming then to the supermarket. He had a lunchtime nap and I did a massive cooking session for the freezer and to help out a friend with a new baby. Played a few games with ds in the afternoon. Fairly mundane but no tantrums (him) or shouty impatience (me) so definitely a good one.

How was your day?

I find meeting anyone is hard tbh.I am invited to various evening things via school and in the village (fairly new to the area) and have managed to get to one and had to leave early. It's very hard to get to the next level of friendship with people when you can't ever go out or certainly not just casually or spontaneously .

Belle, the local (not to me now) LP group met on a Wednesday early afternoon at the Surestart. I challenged them as to why they provided nothing but a Dad's group at the weekend ad a LP group in the middle of the week as so many LPs obviously had to work and couldn't attend.The assumption that LPs could attend a group in office hours as we wouldn't be doing anything else staggered me. And it really pissed me off that there was no weekend provision as that is the time I've found hardest as a LP - because all my friends are less likely to want to come out to play as their partners are home.
Sorry, rant over.

FWIW, I too find tax credits bear no relation to any estimate of what my entitlements are and live in fear of re-paying

Tippy, how daft re the LP group on a Weds pm. I want to find LP friends precisely for hanging out with at weekends, I don't need company on a weekday afternoon! but I am about to start a new thread in this section re eligible man ... come post!

I know! And they had the cheek to tell me that the reason there was just a Dad's group at the w/end was that most Dads couldn't get there during the week because of work! It's still 1955 here some weeks.

very stupid. now my group is for everyone, mums and dads, it is for having fun and just for having someone to chat to in the playground.

I really hope someone joins soon...

I was supposed to go to work cleaning..went out to start the car..flat bastard battery.

Got recovery people out. Jump started car then got to garage and had to pay HUNDRED BLOODY QUID for new battery. Gggrrr

Ds has been a star in potty training.

Scaffolding up next door so haven't had sky/any telly now for nearly 2 weeks. Watched countless DVDs.

Made chips and lamb burgers for my tea but did DS a scrummy smoked haddock, boiled egg and steamed rice kedgeree type thing. With cream. He ate the lot.

I get bored in the evenings.

Mowed the lawn, cleaned out the fish tank, dug up some rancid pansies.

Also rang nursery school about possibility of DS getting a place next year. Looks like he will

Have got the electric blanket on my bed (did it last night) and boy, I recommend everyone has one. They are fantastic for helping you sleep.

Do you not worry about being zapped in your sleep Unlikely? I would (mentaller obviously but I would ). Do they use a lot of electricity?

My ds's dad isn't in our lives at all either btw - he left when ds was 6 months old. No contact, no financial support. He is having a lovely time however, diving and shagging in Thailand.

Good luck to the stupid arse

Nope, the leccy blankets are cheap to run. They might have zapped people in the early fifteen hundreds when they were first invented, but I can honestly promise i leave mine on low all night and have never had the slightest tickle of a shock.

hmm, maybe I could get used to one. Am currently relying on feather eiderdowns, a dog and DD crawling into bed at around 2am to warm me

Your ex sounds like a real charmer. Maybe he'll step on one of those stonefish

well done to your ds on potty training UA - makes life a lot easier once they have the hang of it.

your cooking sounds deelicious, lamb burgers, chips, kedgeree! I am about to finally get round to dinner, finshing off a butternut squash and sweet potato casserole with couscous. It needed paprika and I bought smoked paprika by accident, so it is a bit ... smokey! Have to add a lot of greek yoghurt and then it's quite nice.

Tippy, I always thought leccy blankets would electrocute you in your sleep. but I am too hot at night so would never want one on anyway. hate getting into a hot bed!

I like a hot bed and a cold room. Windows open in January and six duvets, that's me

Me too tippy.... I like a cold room and toasty bed. I wear thick, soft bed socks too.

I am going up now. Ds is waking in the night needing a wee and I am too knackered to fight him to get back in his cotbed aferwards, so the last few nights he has ended up in bed with me.

The way I look at it, I want to make the most of these rare events. He is growing up so damn fast. The sound of him lightly snoring and sucking on his thumb is lovely.

Me too UA. Plus I figure that if she needs a bit of comfort after the last year by getting into my bed then fine. Kudos to you sharing the blanket though

ha ha. What sacrifices we mothers have to make! night x

I had a very productive day today. I am well pleased with myself....:-)

Finally got my arse down to college for enrolment.

Made dinner, did some cleaning, ironing, put washing out to dry and havent spent the day sitting on the pc...so im happy. :o

Hello had a good day after being angry and on egde all day yesterday about nothing in particular. Did a nice meat and veg dinner for dc which always feels good.

Sat with my dd and we are doing a collage of our holiday in Cornwall which is bringing back nice memories. Also memories of how I organised a whole holiday way out of my comfort zone ,first one without xh, and it was a complete triumph .

Sorry some of you dont get any support from your xh/p's. Mine is pretty good although of course the down side is is he is very much around. At times Thailand would be preferrable but I suppose I have to consider dc who are 11 and 13.

UA dont fancy an electric blanket but an electric duvet would be nice .

How was everyones day ?

Well I had a better day today. Still laid low with a bug but managed to make some calls. One to the CSA. Currently trying to persuade ex to pay realistic amount of support. Had been paying £50/month but then stopped (said he was told to by the CSA). Offered me three times that as a revised payment but I asked for four times. He didn't respond so I called the CSA. They said their revised calculation is more than six times what he had been paying!! Means he has to pay that plus loads of arrears.

I texted him to let him know that I knew he was taking me for a ride and he called telling me it was my decision not to abort 'the foetus' and therefore everything down to me. 'The foetus' is now 6!

He had suggested we resolve things between the two of us but after his comments today I reckon it is better for the CSA to collect (I won't be entitled to arrears if I agree that he pays me direct). Have felt very down about all this but suddenly I seem to have rediscovered my strength and feel more positive about things.

Ex still wants no contact and doesn't care what I tell 'the foetus' (which has a name of course but ex won't use it ). Makes me realise with that sort of attitude no contact is probably the way to continue. Ds is a delightful and well adjusted little boy and I'd worry at ex's no doubt negative influence. When ds is older he will know he has a sibling and it will be for him to make contact.

Got an interim payment thingy from student finance that i can activate at college next week so am relieved that it came in time. Now it has I have sorted HB and tax credits properly and can apply for bursaries. So all good there.

I do like getting things straight

Tippychocks it's a nice feeling isn't it? I feel today as if a weight has been lifted from me as I now know exactly what I need to do (I've been way too nice where ex is concerned).

Me too. One of the split reasons is that I can't cope with the Ex's seat-of-the-pants attitude to money. I am much happier on my own

hello good to hear people feeling more positive. though MollieO and at your ds's father. from what you've said here then I would agree better for your ds to go the no contact way.

I had another good day, on a roll of good ones! went out this evening, had a great time. ds is not happy at nursery though which is a big worry.

Can I join? New to this and finding my way. Yesterday was a better day - did loads of filing, tidying and so on while dcs were at school, then we came home, had tea together (really enjoyed that, always used to eat when they were in bed) and they went to bed. Lots of cuddles and laughter. Made the horror of the situation slightly more bearable. Arse Husband currently downstairs getting them ready for school as he is taking them so am going to lounge in bed reading for a bit before tackling my chore mountain...

Morning everyone, hope today will be a better day.

stillcrying, I have been thinking of you.

I am still achy from crying and sadness, haven't reached the point where I can sleep or eat just yet. When, when I ask you, I am so tired!

mummalish and stillcrying
Indulge yourselves: stay in bed, watch crap telly and eat chocolate oranges.Or do something you love, snuggle o te ofa with dcs.It won't matter if the house is dirty or stuff doesn't get done - much more important to be a bit kind to yourself .

Hope everyone had a better end to the week. My Friday was amazing.

Ex being a complete arse so spoke to the CSA today to get claim re-assessment back on track. Wasn't hopeful of much progress as nothing seems to happen quickly and they regularly seem to have computer issues. Also was expecting ex to challenge the assessment I'd been advised verbally by them yesterday (which he said he would do in an abusive call yesterday).

Spoke to a very helpful chap (not put off by my never ending hacking cough) who said he would take charge of my case personally .

Got a message this afternoon to call them. Ex has paid several thousand pounds in arrears today following a call from them (still a drop in the ocean to what he should pay but way better than the current nothing). Assessment is also likely to be confirmed at more than six times what he was paying (before he arbitarily stopped). Probably not the end of the battle but I cannot believe how helpful the CSA have been today.