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So I signed up for Plenty Of Fish

66 replies

GreenDemon · 08/08/2010 13:55

Is there any way to set my profile thingy so that it says on there that I am interested in men between x & y ages, or should I just write it in my bit about me?

I'm sure that the older blokes who have contacted me are lovely, but at 29, I don't really want to meet up with 40yr old men.

How do I reply saying "you're too old" without being a bitch? Or is being a bitch par for the course with these things?

(I'm a regular btw, just don't want family etc knowing about this part of my life just yet)

OP posts:
whiteandnerdy · 08/08/2010 14:25

Goto My Profile->Edit Profile->Mail Settings, this should allow first contact mails to be filtered on age and other stuff.

Can I just add I'm awful at this internet dating, I simply don't reply to people, half the time I'm too embarrassed to read my mail. I just gave up but hope it works for you!

Niceguy2 · 08/08/2010 15:00

Good luck. POF is not for the faint hearted.

TheLifeOfRiley · 08/08/2010 15:46

I think I am too fant hearted for POF, am like WandN, can't get myself to the point of arranging to meet anyone for a coffee or a drink am a right scaredy cat.

Definately get a right mixture on POF - I have had foot fetish guy, bi woman trying her luck, someone thinking insulting me may win my heart, OLD, way too young, serial shaggers, etc. And then when a seemingly nice guy mails me I clam up and daren't reply. Hmm

Hope you have better luck GreenDemon!

knickers0nmyhead · 08/08/2010 17:34

I've signed up too...

I put in my 'about me' bit...'please put X in the subject line so I know you have read my profile'

Amazing how many people actually dont Hmm

Niceguy2 · 08/08/2010 17:44

That's a really good idea. I like that. But from experience, the response rate is so low on POF that like many, I ended up using cut & paste messages. That said, I did have a section which i customised a little.

knickers0nmyhead · 08/08/2010 17:50

I delete messages straight away from people who Dont put 'the word' in the subject line, or who use text speak....which is also mentioned on my profile.

Only actually 'talking' to one person on their at the minute.

Lots have viewed my profile...maybe I scare them off Hmm

atswimtwolengths · 08/08/2010 19:05

Have you tried www.midsummerseve.com? That's free (only 3 messages per day though) and there's a forum, too.

knickers0nmyhead · 08/08/2010 19:08

*there

twoteens · 08/08/2010 20:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GreenDemon · 08/08/2010 20:38

Lol nothing like the odd nutter to brighten your day :o

I've changed the settings, thanks so much.

I have a couple of mates met their DPs through PoF, and they are the nicest of blokes ever, so it obviously can happen. Figured I am at my best online anyway, so I may as well start out online.

I like the putting something in the subject line thing - I'll go do that now too.

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notasheep · 08/08/2010 20:44

I am on Plenty of Fish and was stood up today!! by a planned coffee date.I then went back on the site to find he had deleted his profile.All sounds a bit fishy to me!

GreenDemon · 08/08/2010 20:44

I quite like that I signed up to match a few weeks back and got a message from a bloke who then never heard from again when I finally uploaded a photo. He's sent me a message on PoF - same picture of me. I don't know if I am more appealing on a different site?!

Trying to decide if I am offended or not as he is fairly pretty.

OP posts:
GreenDemon · 08/08/2010 20:47

Being stood up sucks :(

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GreenDemon · 09/08/2010 11:50

Ooh this is fun :o

So I replied to the bloke from before, and he sent me a message asking to add me on facebook. Nothing at all about the stuff I had said in my reply. So he can be deleted then.

I did the bit of putting something to say in the subject line and had a response with it in :o

Am I weird for just enjoying the chatting to random strangers thing?

OP posts:
knickers0nmyhead · 09/08/2010 12:01

Not weird at all Grin

LastOrdersAgain · 09/08/2010 12:16

I met my current beau on PoF. He's absolutely wonderful, and I plan to spend the rest of my life with him Grin I was only on there 4 days, only getting messages from a load of plebs, so thought I'd message one last person (dp) and would unregister if I didn't get a reply by the eve. He replied within 3 mins - the rest is history!

moomoo1967 · 09/08/2010 15:21

I used to use POF, very broad spectrum of people on there. The funny thing is that you can list what you are looking for eg friends or email chat etc. There was one category "Activity Partner" which I told a work colleague about thinking she might find someone to go walking with. Well it turns out that it doesn't mean anything remotely like that, far more sinister !! Thank goodness my colleague didn't sign up and request that !! Smile Very naive of me
I have made quite a few friends on POF whom I am still in contact with

knickers0nmyhead · 09/08/2010 15:54

Anyone having problems trying to get on?

GreenDemon · 09/08/2010 16:32

I only realised what "activity partner" is when someone had it that you couldn't message them if you were looking for one. The same as "other relationship"

But yes, having problems getting on.

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whiteandnerdy · 09/08/2010 16:53

KOMH - from the error message I'm getting looks like POF database has crashed, I expect their trying to fix or restore the database. It all looks very amaturish, as they should be directing people to a holding page instead of showing the .NET error message sigh. Arrrgh I'm such a nerd!!!

gillybean2 · 09/08/2010 17:20

WhiteandNerdy are you looking then? Maybe you should get on the blind date thread and put yourself up as the OP is getting lots of interest, from some 'up north' (by which I mean anywhere north of where I am :) ).

BTW, it's good to see you now have a profile, but I am still confused by your profile on here. It says you're a single parent, but you have no kids!? Confused I guess you just ticked the wrong box or something..

whiteandnerdy · 09/08/2010 17:47

Yeah, with my Mumsnet profile I saw that, it's me not filling in the details of my kids on MumsNet I'm just not happy with putting their details on the site be it "private" or not. And so it shows me as having no kids, [eye-rollage emoticon].

As for me looking, I join these sites, but after a while I realise there's a reason I'm single ... clam up ... and don't contact anyone.

knickers0nmyhead · 09/08/2010 17:47

Some people chose not to put that they have kids Gilly I think Smile

And at 'Activity Partner'

Grin
GreenDemon · 09/08/2010 19:09

any bloody partner does sound quite appealing right now

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gillybean2 · 09/08/2010 19:27

Sorry to highjack
WhiteandNerdy - I simply put the DOB of my ds, didn't put his name or gender even. You didn't hav eto fill in all the boxes. At least you didn't when I signed up. Could be different now I guess.

And know exactly what you mean about those sites. I find them really hard going too and come across as quiet and 'difficult' because I don't give my whole life story after one chat request and won't do webcam or meet up after one 'hi do you want to meet for coffee'.

I would of assumed the 'Activity Partner' meant looking for a friend to do stuff with, like hiking or pub quizes or clay pot throwing. I guess it may mean something else entirely though Hmm