My 16 year old son want to go to London for the day alone.

[Blueknees21]

My son is a very mature and sensible 16 year old. He’s an avid Spurs fan and has been to London numerous times with my husband to watch the football so knows exactly where he is going, what train and tube to catch etc.

he’s getting to the point where he wants to go more regularly and get a season ticket, but whilst my husband likes football he doesn’t want to go weekly. My son is more than happy to go alone and my husband is fine with it too saying I have to let go and let him grow up as it’s good for his confidence and independence, but as a mum I am struggling with it. None of his friends are Spurs fans so don’t have the money or inclination to pay £50 for a ticket plus train/tube/food to watch a team they don’t support.

My son is buzzing to have this solo adventure and promises he will be in touch every step of the way but I’m so anxious. Should I let him go? I’d never forgive myself if something happened. Thank you

I’d begin by agreeing to afternoon matches first.

Plenty of teens that live in London navigate there with no issue from 11.

What are your actual concerns and how can you prepare for them?

Maybe the first step is for you both to travel down there together and whilst you spend the day sightseeing it at a show he can go to the football and meet back up for the journey home

My son and 3 friends went to London (from Birmingham) to watch a YouTube match at West Ham at that age. None of them had been to London or had to change trains before- they had no idea how to get from the station to the ground. They had a great day.
You son is used to the journey and familiar with where he is going. I would have no problem with this.

An excerpt from Finding Nemo, if I may;

Marlin:
I promised I'd never let anything happen to him.
Dory:
Hmm. That's a funny thing to promise.
Marlin:
What?
Dory:
Well you can't never let anything happen to him. Then nothing would ever happen to him. Not much fun for little Harpo.

Let him go OP!

I would let him go. If he gets a season ticket then he will get to know the fans that sit in the same area and probably make a group of friends there.

I was 15 when I went to London on my own for the first time. I lived a couple of hundred miles away and although I had a mobile phone it was before smart phones so I didn't have Google maps. I managed to get lost trying to find the tube station because there were works on and it was way more complicated than I thought it would be. But your son sounds like he has done the journey many times before and he can look up any works or delays and make a plan beforehand.

Don't understand the struggle personally. Great he's got an interest to keep him engaged and busy.

For sure this is OK.

For context my ds2 went to a festival when he was not long turned 16. He was with a bunch of mates but he also needed to be resilient about getting separated from them and what to do.

I assume your DS gets to school, into town, on the train to the next city or whatever? How far are you from London? It sounds like a good thing for him to do. As a PP said, lots and lots of kids in London get to school from age 11 on the tube etc no worries. Especially as on rereading your OP I see he has done this multiple times before.

I'd let him go. If there's a fan bus running from somewhere near you it's a great option. Is he sure he'll be able to get a season ticket? Isn't the waiting list many decades long?

There’s a really long waiting list for Spurs season tickets, my DH and DS1 are season ticket holders. If he’s a member, then he can try and purchase tickets for individual games as and when he wants to go, so maybe suggest he does to day time ones at first. My family go by car, but saying that they’ve never really seen any trouble on match days. The problem with night time games going by train is there isn’t enough trains put on and often there are cancellations, so he would need to know alternative travel plans for this, if there were and disruptions.

Of course let him go. The only match I didn't let my son go to alone was the Newcastle.v Sunderland derby and he was younger than 16 when he had his season ticket. So unless there are any particularly dangerous matches as far as crowd trouble goes then I don't see a problem.

In London 11YOs get themselves to/from school solo on public transport. He’s 16, it’s a football match and not anything weird, you say he’s sensible, he knows the journey well as has done it many times with DH- it’s as fine as it can be because you can’t ever guarantee nothing bad will happen wherever you are, even at home. Let him go.

We are less than an hour by train from London, just outside the Home Counties. DS has been going to London, solo and with friends from 16 onwards having regularly visited with us from an early age. Regarding football - a colleague's son regularly goes to see Arsenal. I think he was 15 when he first started doing this. It involves bus, train, underground changes from where they live.

He’s not far from adulthood op. How far is it and how long would he have to spend travelling?
At 16 many of us were already working full time and paying rent.

My daughter has just turned 17 and has been going to gigs solo since she turned 16 and was old enough. The first couple I travelled to London and met her afterwards but now she comes home alone. I do sometimes meet her at the end of the tube but that's mainly as she gets home quicker than the bus so I get to sleep earlier!

Tbh the tubes are so packed in the evenings that I wouldn't even see any issue then - just meet him at the train station when he gets off.

He's 16! He wants to go to a football match! Don't baby him.

At 16 I was weekly boarding in London and hopped on the train every week to go to school. (At 15 I’d cheerfully taken myself to the exams and then interviews for said school). No mobile phones and never a problem. He’ll be fine.

Sounds fine to me. How far away do you live?

I was going to Camden regularly from about 15, with friends but if he's sensible he'll probably be better off on his own. We lived an hour's train ride away (plus tube). No mobile phones back then, not even Google Maps 😂 I'm sure my mum worried but I was more than capable of looking after myself at that age. It's good to give them independence.

I wouldn’t give this a second thought. He knows the route, has done the same trip many times, is a sensible kid. What is it you’re worrying about happening?

Dd was going by train into central London to school each morning from age 10.

I was married and navigating trains from 300 miles away into London every other weekend to go see dh after he got a job in the City

He is 16. At some point you have to let him go alone

My ds was going to away football matches from 14.. he supported a team based and hour and a half away.

Where I live 16 year old can get married, take on a housing tenancy, vote in national elections and join the army. Sure he'll be grand taking himself to London if he's sensible.

My son is a very mature and sensible 16 year old.

so what’s your problem? I suppose he has a phone. Do you think he will magically be protected from any harm the second he turns 18? (And can therefore do what he likes) He sounds great. Let him enjoy his football. Much better than hanging about at home on screens all weekend.

He'll be fine. We live in London so my two have been travelling around London for years. London is a relatively safe city and easy to find your way around.

He's 16 absolutely he can do it.

I think the fact that your son has already done that exact trip with his dad many times makes it an easy first solo London adventure for him. Then when he wants to go to other parts or other cities alone or with friends, you’ll be reassured that he has the confidence and knowledge in place. Sometimes it’s harder for a mid-teen to go into London with friends who are less assured and a little naive.