What things do you struggle with that are culturally acceptable?

[Amapoleon]

Yesterday I was in the dr's waiting room and watched a mother repeatedly smack her child. The child was very aggressive [I wonder why] and every time he was aggressive she whacked him.

Although illegal in Spain, smacking in some quarters is still acceptable. I am only speaking from my experience in my area and don't want to make sweeping generalisations that all Spanish people smack their kids. There were 4 or 5 other mothers and no one batted an eyelid.

I have to say that when I was living in the UK, what made me really uncomfortable was the lack of direct comments. It makes you feel as if no one really cares.

franca - decoding English is very complicated .

My mother says:

"Do you like beans?" = Would you like me to serve you some beans right now?

"Is the white wine chilled?" = Could you please serve me a glass of white wine now?

And can't understand why my DP doesn't understand what she is saying!

It is Anna, and it is also very fascinating, I love the subtleties. But it can be exhausting, especially when you are new and in need of a real friend or at least a warm chat.
I don't mind being asked personal questions, or being commented on things, it is how you start a conversation here.
I know Italians are rude (and rude is an euphemism to describe the behaviour of a vast portion of Italian society) and I love/admire the British respectfulness, but you always know where you stand here and relationships feel "easier" and more relaxed.

Both my parents come from the type of traditional English family where no-one says anything important directly. My sister and I, having spent many years in other countries, have had to learn to communicate with much greater clarity. But my DP still catches me saying things in "English-"English" (even when I am speaking French!).

The last word I would have thought of to describe Italians would be rude. Are Italians really rude? Never noticed that. I always thought they are extremely courteous.

Mind you I didn't speak great Italian so maybe I didn't notice what they were really saying!

lol Anna

Zzzen, you are right, Italians can be/are very courteous . They love a chat and they try to be helpful.

But they are rude. They don't have a clue what a queue is. They always try to be 'smarter" then the rest. They don't respect the laws. They drive like mad. They don't pick up their dogs poo.
It is a country of rude people, and it got worse in the last 10 yrs

they sound a bit like me actually

except I queue very nicely

Yes, I would agree that the Italians and the British are at opposite ends of the spectrum when it comes to ability to queue! The French are somewhere in the middle.

Zzzen, you should move here my dear, I can teach you Latin.

I'd like to make a statement:

I've always queued like a true Brit, way before my years in the UK . I always get overtaken.

On directness: I once bought a huge cantaloupe melon, and thought I'd take some round to the neighbours as it was delicious, but a bit much for the 3 of us. When the neighbour opened, the door she didn't say hello, just stated, "We don't like that." Her DS started jumping up trying to see the plate, asking what it was, and she said "You've tried it before, we don't like it." Then she turned round and went inside. Other times, she is perfectly nice and polite. God knows what was going on that day...!

I get p'd off with French drivers never using their indicator on roundabouts. You spend ages trying to guess where they are going, before you dare take a chance...But maybe that happens in the UK, too, I hardly ever drive there.

odd rogue comma between opened and the door...

Seeing as everyone is complaining about europeans driver, every time my dh drives in England he gets really annoyed with cars hogging the fast lane and driving slowly.

every time I drive, my dh gets annoyed

Anna
My DH found it difficult to understand me when we first met.

MmeLindt: "I would love a cup of tea"

translation: make me a cup of tea please

MmeLindt: "That dress/ring/scarf is lovely"

translation: I want it. Buy it.

MrsLindt

mmeLindt - my dh never did get what 'that dress/ring is lovely' means.

I even had to buy my own engagement ring! (his money though)

dd is working hard at getting us to move to Italy in fact Franca. She has decided that we are going to live in Rome.

I was discussing Blackadder with some Flemish speaking colleagues yesterday, as it was on TV a few a days ago. I questioned as to whether they "really" understood it. They laughed at me, and said - yes, their English is perfectly good and anyway there were subtitles, and they think it is really funny.

But in Blackadder, so much is word play and "silly" words and references to English history and "Olde Worlde" language, that I can't imagine that a non-native English speaker would ever fully "get it" IFSWIM. And whether it is really possible to translate it. Maybe if they had lived in the UK for a long time......

Ah Rome is beautiful...

"Seeing as everyone is complaining about europeans driver, every time my dh drives in England he gets really annoyed with cars hogging the fast lane and driving slowly."

Mine too!

Here in France, my (French) DH is always complaining about how many people love the middle lane and drive up it for hours on end, regardless of what's happening elsewhere...

Me too! But DH does it sometimes.

The directness thing makes me laugh. We live in UK but DH has Greek family. I had been warned... and sure enough, within 5 minutes of meeting them they'd asked us what we paid in rent and what our respective salaries were and then spend the next 15 minutes working out what we would then have left over...