What things do you struggle with that are culturally acceptable?

[Amapoleon]

Yesterday I was in the dr's waiting room and watched a mother repeatedly smack her child. The child was very aggressive [I wonder why] and every time he was aggressive she whacked him.

Although illegal in Spain, smacking in some quarters is still acceptable. I am only speaking from my experience in my area and don't want to make sweeping generalisations that all Spanish people smack their kids. There were 4 or 5 other mothers and no one batted an eyelid.

Yes, I agree with the nursery schools thing. DD has learnt som much since she started in Sept and she's having a brilliant time too.

Lol at the Brit inability to dress for the weather. I suppose it goes the other way. At least we're unlikely ever to see some one out in Milan with bare legs and white stilletos in winter. Apart from Posh that is, but she just proves the point.

That's because we are hairy Brange

Lol yes, I have a pair of in-built woolly tights I suppose.

If you think 1:7 ratio for babies in belgium is bad, in spain it is..

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wait for it
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1:8!

It´s awful. My mum looked after ds til he was almost 1 but then I had no choice but to put him in nursery from 9am-2.30pm 5 days a week, at that ratio. I just had to not think about it. And the nursery has 1 extra helper between the 3 rooms (0-1 8 babies, 1-2 13kids I think, 2-3 18kids!) who they do say spends most time in the baby room.

He is now 22 months and in the 1-2 yr old room with 12 other kids but in a couple of months he is moving to one which has a max of 10 per class for both 1-2 and 2-3 yr olds. Thank goodness. I had to just reason it is the norm here and the kids all seem well adjusted enough, but it is hard to accept.

Maveta -

I'm shocked about the ratios in nurseries! It must be hellish to work there I work in a 1-2 room and we have 4 adults to 12 children - the under 1 room has 2 adults to 6 babies. And it's still hard to keep an eye on all of them.

I lived in Germany, and definitely noticed the differences in regulations in the kindergartens compared to UK nurseries. A group of 16 two to five year olds had just 2 adults, and they would often just take them to public playgrounds and turn the kids loose. It would never happen in England. I think German parents expected a lot more independence from their children and were happy for them to run off and play by themselves.

Our kindergarten had 24 kids and normally 2 or 3 adults. That was 3 - 6 yo children, and they normally had a student or two to help out.

Talking about the school dinners, that is something that took some getting used to here. The school lunches are prepared by the same woman who makes the meals for the retirement home in the village, so the children eat the same as the elderly residents. That means that this week they ate

Monday
Salade fromagèree
Ragoût de veau marengo
Gratin de choux-fleurs et de pommes de terres
Clémentines

Tuesday
Potage parmentier
Saumon à l'oseille
Nitchines (pâtes)
Julienne de légumes
Banane

Thursday
Salade mélee
Palette de boeuf braisée
Gratin dauphinois
Aubergine grillée
Crème Danette

Friday
Salade mixte
Endive au jambon
Grnocchis de pommes de terre
Tarte aux pommes

Not a turkey twizzler or oven chip in sight

Dd is at nursery school (3-6 yrs old) and she's in a class of 22 children with 2 teachers and 1 TA.
Not sure about creches, I think it's 1:4 for the babies, but it's upped for the 2-3 yrs old

Sounds good Lindt.
They have very sophisticated menus here as well. I'm told that parents often complain because the olive oil used to dress the salad is not extra virgin

wow mmelindt my experience here in NZ is there are no lunches as a rule at day care or schools. a few larger schools occasionally have contractors supply food which is pre-ordered and pre-paid for by parents but is usually chips, pies, pizza and biscuits. So it's packed morning tea and lunch for both every day . As it's what they're used to kiwis think it very weird we give our children hot food at lunchtime. The exception to the rule at ds's school is that on Fridays the parents were rostered to drive to the dairy (corner shop) to pick up lunch orders, again pies, hot chips, crisps, biscuits, cakes etc etc.........

Once a month the PTA organises a sausage sizzle (bbq'd sausages).

All this despite healthy eating being on the agenda.

Mme Lindt sounds lovely.

I'm with the others on the carseat debate. DS (7mo) was screaming his head off in the taxi the other day and the driver asked me why I didn't take him out of the car seat and give him a cuddle. I politely explained that in a lot of countries (my own included) it was illegal to travel without a car seat and that I thought the standard of Singaporean driving was pretty bad and so I didn't trust it enough to travel without one and he'd just have to put up with a bit of noise till we got home.

Also agree on the direct comments. My colleague kindly pointed out on my return to work from maternity leave that I still had a few kilos to lose to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight - like I needed reminding!

I also find the whole grandparents looking after little ones a bit strange. Yes it's ideal if you have someone you trust to look after them whilst you're at work but when it's to the extent that the kids (as young as 3 months old) don't even go home to their parent's homes during the week because they work such long hours seems very alien to me. 2 of my colleagues sent their LOs to their parents in Malaysia during the week (5 hours drive away) and only saw them at the weekends. One was still breastfeeding as well and had to make deliveries of milk at the weekend.

I know we are lucky, I would like to hide in the corner of the cantine and beg for scraps some days. It is great for the DC as they are getting used to proper adult food, and trying things that they would not touch at home.

at the children being brought up by their grandparents, Expectant.

It is an advantage sometimes to be the crazy expat lady doing things differently.

italy,

gp's constantly trying to sneak dd off to get her ears pierced against my wishes.

when i was bf i used to go into back room and the visitors would come follow and have a wee grope telling me i wasn't doing it right/had great boobs for bf

open comments on weight/appearance

pasta for EVERY lunch.dinner. aparently not a meal unless pasta involved.heaven forbid you have just a sandwich.

drink driving

when you go to supermerket/town/petrol tation....everyone has to come. EVERyONE

you're not painting a good picture of italy ridingjoker!

Are there any good things?

I second the earrings on babies. Ugh!

And toddlers with nail varnish

Nasty food colourings like tartrazine and brilliant blue all over the place.

Ridingjoker
you just reminded me of the "Brotzeit" tradition of eating bread and cold cuts in the evening in Germany. I found it weird to begin with but have got used to it.

Carmen- my dd's nursery school teacher painted the nails of all of the girls a rather vibrant pink.

Didn't bother me at all. Except the colour, it was rather bright.

My favourite shop here is Hema, a cross between WHSmiths/Woolworths/Boots, and it has lovely clothes and toys, but you have to be careful about the sweets, they are full of radioactive waste e-numbers.

good things about italy.....hmmmm.......i am struggling....oh now that dc dad is now my ex...when he goes to the house over there he will take them on his own and i will get some time to myself

and i forgot...being told you have your seatbelt on wrong. should go under your armpit aparently so you dont get a red mark on your neck if you have an accident

Belgo
I love Hema. I could wander about for hours looking at cheap plastic tat/things that I don't need. I bought curtains there, they were great value for money.

mmeLindt - I spend far too much money in Hema, their children's clothes are so lovely and bright compared to the brown/grey/black clothes that most belgian children wear. The craft stuff is also very good.

I do the opposite - I notice things that the expats do which would be very normal in the UK but are not as usual here. Little things like dummies and wearing armbands in the swimming pool (which is a wave pool and so very shallow at the entrance.)

I live near the airport and frequently see families who have just picked up a hire car and have 3 children completely unrestrained in any way in the back. Not sure what nationality they are - but if I see one, sure as eggs I'll see another 3 soon after so it must be one particular plane.

When I first came I noticed people refer to "Asian drivers" in the same voice I have heard for "woman driver". But I don't hear that as much.

Re. the kindergarten's, dd has been in a class of at least 20, with ONE teacher only since she was 2.5. And they all go on trips to the park and the local supermarket. As someone said earlier, the dcs are used to it and are very well behaved. The teacher hands out lollipops for outstanding behaviour . She doesn't put up with any nonsense though.

Belgo, like you I am happy to bring up dd here - there are a lot more opportunities and facilities available to children here, and they are mostly so cheap!

portofino - yes the nursery school teachers have up to 28 children, from the age of two and a half. When they go for a walk into town, (probalby two kms) they have one adult at the front, one at the back, and all the children walk two by two holding hands.

Even my own children don't walk that nicely when they come out with me!

DS's school teacher took all 22 children to the natural history museum alone. We dropped the DC off and picked them up 2 hours later. They are 4 - 5 yo.