Der Herbst ist da - wir wollen aber kein Regenwetter: Life in Germany cont/d

[finknottle]

Too lazy to scroll through the other long one.

Here for Obst und Blaetter - guess what d came home from school singing yesterday?

All welcome, Austria & Switzerland & any German-speaking Leute too

Admylin
Have a look a this thread on Toytown

One of the great things about Mumsnet is that you can have an in-depth discussion about Obama's economic, healthcare & foreign policies, the new congressional & senate seat allocation and lots of goodly political stuff as well as drooling over Obama and discussing his shaggability

I just had an emotional meeting with my neighbour who still has not calmed down yet. We cried and hugged

She is going to a meeting with other "trailing spouses" of our DH's company tonight so has to get it out of her system before she meets up with the disappointed Sarah Palin supporters

That is what we are called, btw. Trailing spouses.

too at 'trailing spouses', makes you sound drippy and needy, bleating behind your husbands in dishevelled floaty dresses, lol.

You sound like you're enjoying life in Geneva Wish we could cheer admylin up

Hi all

Psychology eh, Gabs?! Well we'll make a fabulous case study. This could be your phD in fact: "The psychology of trailing spouses and their latent or blatent alcoholism" ... Not to mention the hobnob attacks.

I think admylin is worn out, it's been a non-stop exhausting stress experience for quite some time and I wouldn't be surprised if she is feeling depressed now. Maybe your body (and head) wants a break admylin. I'm thinking a couple of long walks, some funny films, mooning about all morning painting your finger-nails with a facemask on and serving bread rolls with cheese for meals (German style). That type of thing.

OMG just struck me
I am bleaty and needy and I do wear floaty dresses (not so much in winter though)

This is serious, isn't it? Need my Poirot DVDs and some salt and vinegar crisps, quick!

LOL at Fink's definition of a trailing spouse and Z's angst at being one

Started a new thread about Trailing Spouses

Why are you crying and hugging your neighbour though Mme L? Is this something to do with the American election or a quaint Swiss custom I am not acquainted with?

She is American and a big Obama fan (who isn't over here?) and she is just so excited that he won. She said that she kept bursting into tears when she was watching the news coverage. We were talking about her friend in America, who is African American and how estatic she was.

She texted me yesterday that it was a great feeling, at last not to have to feel embarrassed to be an American.

We are going round for celebratory drinks tomorrow evening.

Well when I first moved to Germany I know Americans were quite "in" and there were a lot of people around who seemed to feel a particular connection to America. In fact they seemed more American than the Americans.

Then it turned about completely and everything American was bad and openly derided. I think it would be nice if Obama being in office creates a bit more goodwill towards America. Hopefully their policies will earn it too. I'm not comfortable with the yank-bashing that used to go on in Berlin a couple of years ago. It was extreme for a while.

I'm not a great fan of the American way of life because I think their society is too harsh and too many fall by the wayside but at times you'd hear things said against Americans all over Europe that people would not have dared say against say a developping country, yet it was somehow salon-fähig to do it with the Americans because it's a powerful country.

You know you are all right I just seem to moan about things at the moment don't I. I need a trip back home that's for sure but the dc would fall into an even deeper depression than me when we have to come back, they always do.

Love the trailing spouse thread idea. What a way to end eh, or is there hope, will we pull out of this laughing? I've just realised that I let h have too much freedom of choice. Infact I shouldn't have let him leave his better payed fairly sure job in Berlin just because he was bored, talk about mid-life-crisis and I fell for it. Anyway his colleague has been telling him off over the phone that he has to settle and stop looking for jobs and just make the most of what he has got - then I realised I should be saying that, I totally forgot to complain. Someone slap me..

Admylin, you're not moaning, you're unhappy and if we couldn't vent on here, MN would be a far sadder place!
Amazes me sometimes when I go along with something and only months later stop & think, "What?" by which time it's too late. In your case, well, you're in Hannover now & we'd like to offer advice & support on how to make it more bearable for you. We all lean on each other at different times.

If I were to offer instant advice it would be to choose a few things that YOU like doing and DO them, regardless of children or husband. Go-onnnnnn, it does help.
So whatya gonna do?

I'll be on the next flight to Newcastle then!

Actually I need to see if I can upgrade the cable connection included in the flat so I could watch decent TV atleast.

How about sod the expense and go home for Christmas? Cheaper than therapy
It will cheer you enormously, you will so enjoy the build-up here, Christmas markets, you'll buy dinky German presents for people & get away with it as they're typical Weihnachtsmarkt thingies and you will send a message to your h that you and the children's happiness is just as important (or more so) as his 'mid-life' job crisis.
Families only function when all the members' needs are treated equally. (That one's from bitter experience)

I'll look into flights - i twould certainly make the dc's day - look there I am thinking of everyone and how I can make them all happy or happier. I need to be abit more selfish, it would make MY day too.

ah, Admylin, but we have all been where you are at some point so we recognise the place that you are in.

I agree with Finknottle, you have to do something for yourself. It does not have to be anything expensive, even if you just go into town and have a coffee somewhere. Go to List and browse some of the nice wee shops. Have a wander around the Markthalle (been there yet?) or around the Maschsee.

I think it is easy to get stuck in a rut of staying at home, I have to force myself to go out some days, otherwise I would sit int he house and mn.

Hmm, DD is at her friends house 3 doors down and DS has just fallen asleep on the couch. I said I would come at 5.30 to pick her up. I dont have the other mums phone number. what do I do now?

x-post.
Yes to TV, when we got satellite TV it made me feel so much less cut off. Have the occasional pang of self-pity at M&S food adverts but it's great.
So many more things are now available Free to Air, my US friend here gets ITV with their German dish.
used this a lot for info

mmelindt, they never want to come home on time anyway do they? How is the French going? I'd love to drop the German and start with French (just because I know I can speak it and will never be able to speak perfect German!)

Have you been watching French TV?

I think I will go for a wander in the Matkthalle - the neighbour suggested we go on or bikes for the exercise and she would show me where the good shops are for all my speciality Indian spices too.

MmeLindt, 3 doors down? Cushions on the floor in case he falls off & leg it down & ask her to do shoes/coat & bring your d back? That's what I'd do, he's not a baby & you'd be gone, what 2 mins max?

Admylin
Do go to the Markthalle, we used to love it. That and Bagel Brothers. You have been to Bagel Brothers though, havent you Their chicken bagel is fab. And the egg one. And the ... bugger, they are all great. Now I am hungry

Finknottle
We live in a villenviertel, our house is the smallest one on the road. They all have swimming pools and huuuuuge gardens. Very leafy suburbia. I was reading that Phil Collins used to live in our village, the website called it "a chic suburb of Geneva" which is not quite accurate but sounds good. It is a lot more rural than chic

Admylin - doing my BaSc with the OU - they are really good although yes, pricey. DH's job paid for my first few years as a perk of relocating and it is a good tax dodge so I am probably quids in.

Yuchy mould - well done for sorting it. I am pants at things like that. We had some in our kitchen (the lardery type bit) and DH sorted it. We've put the fridge in there to try and keep it a bit dryer/warmer.

Looks like everyone has given you great advice/posts so you don't need any input from DrGabster. Book the trip home. The happy kids alone will cheer you up.

Hmmm - Zzen - I think a paper about hobnobs would be much more interesting ..... whether they are culturally transferrable perhaps ....

By the by, think I have some news.

All this talk of repatriating and then DH rings me today saying they have just had a big all employee meeting at work and offered voluntary redundancy package - want to cut staff by 10%.

He has signed up for it .

Apparently its first come first served and we were discussing him leaving anyways after recent hassles so he took the initiative ...... Here we go again. Does that mean I have to buy a floaty dress then?

LOL, Gabster at you wittering away about hobnobs and then as an aside dropping your news into the conversation.

How do you feel about it? Do you both want to stay in Germany or is he applying elsewhere too.

Could he apply for jobs in Geneva?

I don't know what the cold weather alternative of a floaty dress is for a trailing spouse. A cashmere pashmina?

Oh dear - I have two cashmere pashmina's already. It Doesn't look good.

I feel quite good about it. It is something that has been on the cards for a long time - each time the company is taken over we joke about voluntary redundancies as he has been unhappy there for quite a while. I suppose that's why he did it without checking first. He is v. considerate really .... for a man.

Would Lurrrrrve to move to Geneva but not sure there is demand for his type of area there. Still, we are going to give it a few months to see if he can get a job here first. We always did fancy Canada before we came here so maybe look there too. Mind you, has been looking (on and off) for 2 yrs so don't fancy his chances!

Admylin - did you get your day out? Have you booked flights?