Neue Stifte, neues Maeppchen: new German school thread

[finknottle]

Am starting in positive manner as we're 7 weeks into the new school year and all 3 of mine are settled and happy.
Well, d won't be if she does have head lice and has to stay off because she loves school so much.
S1 is in the second year of secondary & still thriving. Is class prefect for the first time which was a great ego boost.
S2 is in Y4 & has been doing better in class but his test results are still lousy (unfortunate choice of phrase if we are lice-ridden) and his teacher is convinced it's the language issue. He's trying harder which is a good sign. He lost the prefect election by 1 vote to his best friend and was chuffed to bits to be his "deputy" and that so many voted for him.

Had forgotten how wonderful the "erste Klasse" is.

I wrote a note like this :

Dear ms X, I'm extremely sorry to inform you that I have misplaced the audio-cd which came with the work book so ds was unable to complete number 4b. I can assure you , when I find it he will complete any missing work. Yours sincerely Admylin

I'm now prepared for any such notes as the one the teacher sent the first time shocked me - we'd been doing homework and I make him pack his stuff etc the night before ...but now I'm going to be as chilled out as you and just sign them with no comment, headache, stress ....right ?

Westvan you are going to be so helpful on here, I think you have the dc furthest on in the system of us all so you and finks might help us all through this eh!

could you borrow the same cd off another kid and make a copy?

If you have previously communicated with the teacher in English, I'd write note in English, but if all previous communication has been only in German, I'd personally send a note in (badly-written) German.

Went into Kg this morning and they said no problem for him to remain at Kindergarten, and even offered for him to stay full time in current class and not move up to Vorschulklass, to minimise moves and disruption for him. I doubt I would do this, especially if his friends move up, but was impressed they were prepared to think of the best senarios for him, rather than forcing adherence to the rules no matter whether it's in the child's best interests or not. Just got to fill out forms for the school to delay entry, but still have to have doctors untersuchung which I'm not delighted about, but hey ho.

Thanks for your advice.

Arghhh, don't say that Ernest! I've already sent it in and it's in English (now just have to hope ds hands it in ) She is the English teacher.

Good news about the Kindergarten. The test they do is usually something like repeating words, repeating rows of numbers and drawing something like different shapes or a face I think. My dd burst into tears after about 3 minutes because she didn't like the woman doing the test and then she refused to draw the shapes, then she drew them when the woman went out ofthe room but she said she didn't know if dd had really drawn them then, but they still let her go to school a year early so not really sure about the real value of these tests.

ah no, I'm a bit thick - she is the English teacher, so yes, I think it's fine you wrote in English. doh, my fault. I just think it gets people's backs up when English people start speaking or writing in English on the assumtion that they should understand them. But of course, if she's the english teacher, then it's a reasonable assumption

Well, as ds3 has bust his glasses, I hope I can schedule the test once he's got his new ones, or he won't be able to see chuff all anyway. Not that I want him to do well. what am I on about? It's all getting too much

How are your 2 getting on at school Ernest? Do you see what they are doing? I'm worried about my 2 going back to UK someday as they are in German schooling and it's hard work trying to get them to do some English work after all the German homework.

I know they would catch up as they are bright enough but it's a worry isn't it. Just another worry on top of all the others!

I hink hey've done amazingly well given they've started school 2 or 3 years later than most of the other kids and had to learn (written) English off the hoof, ie they never got taught phonics or spelling rules or anyhing. When they started, they wrote everything phonetically, like German, but seem to be good spellers etc already.

How they compare to brit kid tho no idea. How school is in terms of standards etc also no idea. but it is lovely fun school. Am v. happy & any proplems we have had (and there have baan a couple of big ones) have been immediately and thoroughly dealt with. been v. pleased with that.

it is a worry though, more for me for ds1 esp as he's 'out of year'. Once in situ I guess it'll calm down. actually, who am I kidding, no it won't, as we'll have to prepare for the madness that is 11+, assuming he gets to stay down the year.

Gah, it is tough. How's your ds today? How old is he?

He's 10 and he's not speaking to me today or he wasn'tthis morning. He kepes getting bored and then fighting with his sister which I usualyl ignor eor leave them to it as they both give as good as they get. However, yesterda yhe was teasing her and thought it funny to rub his hand on his foot and then rub her face with his hand. So I took his nintendo ds away.

We'll see if he speaks to me when he comes back from school! Dd is on a day trip to a bio farm and I have to go and pick her up at the bus stop later which is just near his school so i might see him. Still, I'm worried about a 10year old who comes out with things like life is so frustrating and why do we have to live so long.

That's hard.

My ds said to me he didn't want to live anymore, life wasn't fun anymore and he wished he could be young like ds3 (5) again.

He had so much fun in CH, it really was an idyllic life for them. He was so happy and still cries about CH. Dh gets cross and is v. unsympatheitic. I'm trying to find the balance bwn empathy (I really know how hard it is to be forced to leave somewhere where you were so happy) but this makes him worse, and jollying him along.

I pray though, that we get this move to the UK right in terms of town, type & location of house & school etc. I've learnt a lot with this move and hope it helps us to make the right decision.

Is your dh still looking for other jobs in UK? Does he feel your ds's pain in the same way you do, or is he more like my dh?

I think your ds will be ok in with his age group ernest. Really I do. The only thing as I said before is I would investigate maths - have a look at the online Bond books to see what his year is currently doing in maths and see to it you fill any gaps, or order a maths workbook and see what it contains.

I think 11+ is a whole other kettle of fish though. Someone posted some sample questions on MN and when I read them (maths) my brain went weak and fuzzy and I could not be bothered even TRYING to get what they were about. I really think they do not as much test knowledge and potential as how well the dc have been trained/prepared to do these particular tests. That is why if you want to do the 11+ exams you'd have to get the 11+ workbooks and train your ds to understand the tests and know how to go about them. If you send an intelligent dc in and confront him for the first time with those kind of questions, I personally think he'd fail.

I agree. Just need an informed person to tell me to buy book x y and z, and do x amounts of minutes per day/week - really no idea what best to get or how to help him, there's just too much variety

link lizs gave was good, but also baffling amount

OMG Ernest, how did you react when your ds said he didn't want to live any more? I don't know how to deal with ds at all. I don't understand why he's so stroppy to me and then again I do understand and feel sorry for him. But I have to tell him off coonstantly for saying Pech instead of answering me and for being rude or unfriendly. I just don't know how to help him.

I've had another person tell me I should be leaving here as soon as I can and that was the neighbour. Gawd, I've only known her for 4 months. So much for positive thinking in 2009!

Have to say, it wasn't my best mummy moment I wanted to burst into tears and scream, but managed to keep calm head on. I understood he wasn't actually really talking about suicide, just trying to explain how sad he was atm.. It did really help me decide we should move back to UK, I know it just isn't working here, and tbh, don't think it will. I've enver missed the UK, and don't feel homesick, so it was a reasonably cooly made decision. (cool meant as in free of emotion)

TBH, if I may say so, your sadness at being in Germany leaps out of every post. It is almost tangiable. I don't know what you can do, or how you do it, but for your mental health (and I ean that seriously) if I missed the UK as much as you do I would certainly look into making it happen asap. It's not a Q of positive thinking or not, either you're happy or you're not. No amount of positive thinking if^s going to change an aching in your heart like that.

Your ds may either be picking up subtle (or not so) signals from you that you're unhappy, or he may completely independently also feel unhappy in Germany, but my God if you are so sad in a place, and your ds is too, I think you owe it to yourself and your son to try to fix it. I hope that came across right. that was meant totally 100% sympathetically and supportive, not telling off.

Thanks for that Ernest, it's about what the neighbour said to me this morning and I'm working on it, even it means having to do it without h. I just wish we could get some great job offer for him then we could try family life in a place where we would be happy too. It might make a big difference to the way we just live along side each other at the moment.

hard thing to hear your dc say.

I'm sorry admylin I don't know what to say about ds. What made your neighbour say that to you?

I agree with ernest you have never sounded as if you were happy in Germany.

How are you today, admylin? It must be so difficult to hear your ds say stuff like that, especially when you are struggling yourself. I agree with the others that Germany is probably not the right place for you atm. Hard though to just up sticks and move but maybe that's what you all need?

We're getting back into the old school routine after 3 whole weeks off which were bliss. Ds, in particular, was like a different child - so much calmer. The time off seems to have done him good and I'm hoping that he'll settle down more at school now, but doubt it'll be that easy....

I'm off to an Infoabend this evening for all the parents of dc in the 4. Klasse. Then in one month is the dreaded Empfehlung.

Hi everyone.
Well, ds has heard whta he'll be getting on his half term report for German - it's a 4. H is going to flip and nag and ds wants tojust not show it when we get it in the hop ethat h hasn't clicke dthat there is a half term report.

Another thing, I'm from the north so want to ask if by any chance, any of you southerners say 'offen' when pronouncing the word 'often'??
Ds hates English lessons now, he says the teacher speaks wrong and she has told the class to say offen instead of often never heard of it myself but it could just be me...?

Hi admylin. I'm a southerner and I think I sometimes pronounce it with the 't' and sometimes without. Found this discussion on that very subject!

It's a shame that he hates his English lessons. Do you think the teacher resents having a native speaker in the class and gives him a hard time?

Wow, that discussion is great, I should try and get ds to give her the link! I'm infact one of the 18% who pronounces the 't' according to that poll.

Ds has quite a few problems with English lessons. He says it's painful when he has to listen to the German accents and then he finds it boring but isn't getting good grades as full points are knocked off for silly little mistakes.

Had to try it a few times, seems I don't always pronounce the "t", probably most of the time.

I think the teacher is maybe trying to emphasise the "no t" pronunciation because it is not what a German speaker would automatically do. Since they have "oft", they would presumably automatically say ofTen. I think it is being very picky though because I do think I sometimes say the "t" and as you say, if you do as a native speaker, why should your dc not follow your example? Weird.

Perhaps though we cannot realistically expect a German teacher of English to be aware of and sensitive about all the possible variances in pronunciation. When you think about it the situation is quite odd, isn't it, teaching English as a non-native to a native speaker of the language.

I suppose he couldn't change to French as a first foreign lanuage? Out of the frying pan..?

It's hard for us to figure isn't it? I mean, if ever a native speaker was available in our school the teacher was always delighted to have the chance to practise and to get us to try to speak to, and understand a native speaker.

I once had a French girl staying and she was welcomed into the French lesson. Recently I heard of Spanish and german dc going to my niece's school and being praised and offered the chance to sit their GCSE in Spanish and German at the age of 12. And all my 2 get is the feeling that they don't speak proper English.

I wonder if this will happen to dd next year.

Does your ds have to participate fully in the English lessons or is he allowed to sit and read a book?

How's your dd getting on atm?

Hi girls. Taipo, I think it will depend entirely on the teacher. In general he will be expected to do exactly what the class is doing, as you know, German teachers don't do different activities/goals for different kids, they are just boxing through the curriculum, the book, it's all the same for everybody.

Admylin I think secondary is often different. Your ds has been a bit unfortunate with his teacher. I am assuming that if you teach English at secondary, you will have studied English and therefore be more confident and perhaps also more motivated to keep learning from native speaking dc yourself. Whereas a primary school teacher has not studied English and may generally not be that confident and want to go fully by the book, not be capable of coping with any variance

I was hoping it might be at least one subject she won't have to get stressed about. Seems that might not be the case....

Remembering back, in primary school in Berlin ds was happy with the lessons as he was given an advanced book and was allowed to work through it at his pace and the teacher would mark it for him. She also brought him books to read. This school he goes to now, I thought would be better as you say ZZZen - Gymnasium teacher, studied English etc, thought she'd be pleased to have a native speaker to help her but she seems to be cracking under the strain and stress of teaching. She's quite young but she doesn't seem confident or happy when I've seen her.