Anyone moved to the USA? Would you?

[Atla]

My husband and kids have Irish citizenship, I have British citizenship. DH works for a US company and has the opportunity to transfer his role to the US. It would mean a substantial salary increase and better opportunity for promotion. His job would be based in New Hampshire near Maine/Massachusetts border.

I'm a nurse but I feel like it would be a slog to get my state license to practise and appropriate visa but, as with all things, not impossible.

We are early 40's and have 3 small children - 8,7 & 4 - I have all sorts going around in my head and its very overwhelming - choosing where to base ourselves, finding schools, is it fair on kids, sorting out healthcare and insurance, very different tax/expenses, could I work? Would I want to (!).... are we too old?!

Has anyone done similar? How did it go? I dont even know what I'm asking really. I have previously lived in the states (to study) but over 20 years ago and in the mid-west, so very different area.

It would be a huge gamble and potentially a costly mistake but I am somehow up for it? It is an opportunity that has come a bit out of the blue although obviously isnt going to happen in the middle of covid so we have some time to consider. Wwyd?

I think first of all you need to ascertain what visas you would all be on.

You may need to do some retraining as nurses in the US are expected to have training in all areas of nursing.

You couldn’t pay me ten times my worth to move to the USA right now. Have you seen the news lately? If Strump gets re-elected it will be renamed Gilead I couldn’t get past all of that.

Yes - I certainly have reservations regarding politics, guns/gun control and healthcare.

I would have to pass a qualifications equivalency test for the state I was planning to work in - CGFNS evaluate and qualifying exam, plus NCLEX-RN exam to get a license to practice, as well as an appropriate Visa (hence it being a slog). I have general and mental health training hours, but no obstetrics or paediatrics so might have to do some additional training - I've done a bit of research which suggests requirements vary state by state.

DH would be sponsored for Visa by his company, me and the kids would go as dependants. I could then apply to change my visa status whilst in the US - I'm aware this would take a long time, but it would give me time to organise getting my license to practice etc. Obviously we need to do a lot more research/get proper immigration advice, the opportunity was only mentioned to DH yesterday so hardly had time to think!

I wouldn’t consider it personally as long as Trump is in the White House. Even if he goes in November, it will take a generation to undo the damage his term has done to society, if it ever happens. I couldn’t like in a country where significant numbers of people think the way so many Americans do. Money isn’t everything, my soul would die out there.

And I would be terrified of the potential influences on my young children and their thinking. Just a complete no from me! But good luck whatever you decide.

I just turned down something similar because of the political situation. Read about what's happening with the post office. Trump is not going to leave office quietly.

It would have to be for a large, large sum of money, never mind Trump or anything else, it's expensive in most places that are not dumps.

unfortunately with the cover situation and Trump I wouldn't right now. A few years ago perhaps! It is slowly becoming a pretty dire place to live.

covid not cover

There was time maybe 10-15 years ago I may have thought about it but absolutely not now. It seems to have changed substantially under Trumps presidency.

And even then, it would be very region dependent. I'd move to some places there in a heartbeat for a large salary and a great job with lots of flexibility, but not to other places for any amount. It's like any place else on Earth: some places are great, others are total shitholes.

Yes. I live in New England. I love it. We earn a LOT more, have a great quality of life and we have no wish to move back. As a non white person I actually find Britain extremely (if not more) racist.
I find racist right wing Americans are openly so. In Britain it’s much more insidious. Ordinary middle class people are much more uncomfortable talking about race and much less open to having their beliefs questioned.
Remember Clinton got 2 million MORE votes than Trump. Meanwhile BoJo won decisively.

As a non-white person, no way! I'd worry for my son and husband.

Yeah, the Trump thing wouldn't even register with me if considering such a job. But I'd have to earn enough to send my kids to private schools once they got to intermediate/6th grade.

I currently live in the US and you’ll be going to a v. liberal ( as in left wing) area so I wouldn’t worry about Trump too much. You probably won’t find many of his supporters there ( if he’s even still president, which is v. doubtful).

Def. research your visa status thoroughly and make sure that you can even study on your initial visa, there are so many different types. Personally, if it’s for a limited time, I’d say go for it while your children are primary age and can easily slit back into the British education system. You’ll all experience a very different culture and have some great opportunities. I think you’ll really appreciate what you have in the UK but also see positivity and emphasis on hard work in the US.

It’s just a different perspective on life and I know it’s done my kids good to experience the different cultures, not to mention me!

@Atla Its always been my dream since I was a child to immigrate to the USA. but i chose UK to do my undergraduate (due to the exchange rate and lower tuition fees mainly ) and in many ways, it was correct because the UK is a much easier place to live in many ways as an adult who has to pay bills.

Health insurance would be a big worry for me. With 3 children, it can really eat into your disposable income.

I’ve done it twice.

I think New Hampshire would be lovely. Are you talking the Portsmouth/Exeter area? DH went to high school in Exeter, so I know the area. It is freezing in winter, but nothing proper clothing doesn’t sort out.

Settle in a good school district and your kids are sorted. Presumably if your DH’s employers are willing to relocate him, they will have a decent health care package.

Whether you work or not perhaps depends on how long you plan to stay. If it is relatively short term, enjoy a SAH life. If longer, just jump through the hoops for certification.

As a non white person I actually find Britain extremely (if not more) racist.

This is interesting Cha. I did actually feel a lot less 'other' when we holidayed in Florida last year (compared to England), but not sure I could ever move there.

Thanks everyone. It's a lot to think about for sure.

@CraftyGin - yes, roughly Portsmouth/Exeter area, ha - I've only been in summer but have heard tell of serious snow and freezing winters .

@AmICrazyorWhat2 I agree that it would really benefit the kids to experience a different culture in its entirety- positives and negatives etc.

It's interesting as just discussing all this has been the catalyst for me and DH really thinking about and kind of re-evaluating future plans/options so its positive, whatever happens. Thanks all

I'd go for it, provided that I could live in a majority democrat area.

There’s skiing in the winter- it’s cold in a way that we don’t experience often in the UK, but the clothes/houses are built for it. Re. Healthcare. The company’s package will probably be good, although you’ll have to contribute towards the monthly premiums, just like any type of insurance, so factor that in when looking at the salary.

I honestly wouldn’t worry about Trump’s influence long term. Only four years ago Obama was President- personally I think it’s going to swing back in November and I do think Trump will step down.

@RubieRose. I’d agree with Cha that it’s less racist in many areas here ( I’m white so can only go on what I’ve witnessed/been told). Mind you, I’ve only ever lived in cities and currently live in a majority African-American area. It might be totally different in rural places.

Don’t underestimate how expensive it is. DH earns well on paper but we don’t have enough for holidays, replacing cars, fixing things around the house or much saving tbh. There are a lot of hidden taxes. And we are always paying out of pocket for healthcare. Which is where our spare money goes basically. If the company is going to pay for housing, that would be one less worry.

For schools look at greatschools.org which has school rankings. You’re assigned by neighbourhood unless a school has open enrolment, then you can apply but they won’t get bus transportation to/from.

You can find my sweet, naive posts on here from earlier this year: after worrying about all kinds of things we ended up moving here in Feb and slammed straight into covid so haven't been able to leave since..

However - I don't regret it for a second despite the general 2020 sh*tshow. We moved with a 6 and 7 year old and my husband made it into his new office twice before the stay at home order struck yet the experience for them and us of experiencing a new culture, discovering new things together etc has been weirdly beneficial..

P.S. Completely agree with it being expensive, depending on where you go, but there are sites online where you can work out what living costs you will need etc so can check if it's financially viable