Considering US move - head spinning!

[MissPlumBroughtALadder]

DH came home from work lady night with the news that part of his team may be relocated to the US and the company would like to know if he's interested in moving to either Boston or San Francisco. We're not opposed to the idea in principle but I don't even know how to start thinking about making the decision. I'd love to pick the brains of people who have done similar - what did you find helpful? What did you wish you'd known about before moving/deciding to move?
My first question: would I be able to work? Would DS be eligible for any sort of childcare or play group place? He's 2.5; we'd be moving before he turns 3.
I've spent some time in San Francisco, but it was ten years ago, long before DH and DS came along. What are the two cities like for families? We're very much into healthy living, organic eating, attachment parenting type stuff. I assume they're both good places for such stuff, but could be wrong. And can anyone comment on the general standard of living and what we should be looking for in a relocation package?
Sorry for the string of ill thought out questions - my head just doesn't know where to go!

Hi, have you checked out britishexpat.com? Its a great source of information and has a forum section too

San Fran would be perfect for you - spiritual and actual home of the Green Market, Locavore movement (think Alice Waters) and full of young cool parents.

I have a major case of envy.

We are currently on a 16 day California road trip, partly cos we want to see if we could live here. Spent the first 4 days in San Fran. Visited a friend who moved here from UK with his family a year ago. I had a gazillion questions for him.

Bank accounts - if you bank with HSBCyou cash setup a US bank account whilst in the UK still.

Tax - California has both federal and state taxes. Not all states have state tax. So tax rates (with sales tax thrown in) area in similar to UK in Calornia. (Washington State for example has no state tax so total tax is around 10% cheaper, not sure about Mass.).

Climate - it is perfect here. Massive bright blue skies, lovely and warm without being too hot (she says from Death Valley where its currently 39!). Boston would have proper serious seasons.

SF is expensive. Our friends live south in San Carlos. They have the most amazing views over the bay. Palo Alto is lovely but expensive.

We are loving it here and don't want to go home!! We would come in a heartbeat and certainly hope to be out here in the next year or two. Although we have a huge worry re schools.

Good luck. Can you come out on a reccy?

Wow! Some amazing words of wisdom; thank you. I'll come back later when I have more time but wanted to say a quick thanks. We do bank with HSBC. DH is going to Boston next week for a work trip so will hopefully gain a little feel for the place then. We're not under time pressure to make any decision yet.

SF is more the flavour you want, but either would do. Both expensive but SF more likely to cost more. I assume your DH must be very well paid.

Check the medical cover, see if it includes dental especially.

Lived in Boston for a few years & our eldest was born out there. The most difficult thing we found was a lack of credit history which meant we couldn't even get a mobile phone until we'd been there a while therefore I'd recommend getting an American Express credit card here as that'll start you off here & then they'll give you a US card of similar credit value when you're there so you can start building your credit history.

Boston is an amazing city & id definitely recommend it as a place to live. Feel free to PM me if you do decide to move there. (I've only ever visited SF as a holiday so don't know what it's like as a place to live, but it's a fab city to visit).

You will need your own visa if you want to work though so check that out properly. Good luck - all v exciting!

HolidayCriminal my DH is not especially well paid in the UK (just does something a bit niche and currently works for an American company) but that does bring me to a rather indelicate question: what is well paid in the US? Particularly for the two cities mentioned? I have absolutely no idea at all how to compare salaries, particularly once you start tryi g to compare health insurance policies etc. But as a rough guide, could anyone say what would be considered a good salary? Say, would give you a lifestyle similar to earning 100k in the UK?

Onedev thank you for replying, I'll think up some Boston questions for you when I have some time!

I was going to say get an Amex, we were able to transfer my Canadian Amex history to the USA for a card, couldn't get a c/c any other way. We were able to get phones through verizon without our SSN but it was a hassle and we paid $400 deposit per phone line. Also had to pay deposits to the utilities, about another thousand.

It depends on if your company will consider you an expat or will relocate you as a local hire as to what you get in benefits. We came as locals unfortunately so got a lump sum for the move and settling in accommodation. Tbh it didn't even cover the freight to move let alone air fares, so make sure you add all that up. Also allow for 60-90 days temp accommodation in serviced apt. We are in Texas and paid 3k per mth for 2 bed, basic furnished apt, others we know we're paying 6k/mth!

Check if your company has a relationship with a bank for mortgages (if you want to go that route) or car loans. Ours did and didn't tell us. We ended up buying as rent was more than a mortgage and it was coming out of our pocket any way. We had to have 20% deposit and was okay to provide all details from UK accounts but had to justify every income and transfer over 1300quid for money laundering laws.

We were able to get a car loan on a new car after being here 6mths as well, so it is quite quick to build up a credit history.

We would love to more to either of your city options, we were just talking about San Fran today as our company head office is there technically, but they no longer send people there, just the lawyers. Boston is a lo Ely City in a lovely Area, beautiful country side, not far from the coast and a couple of hours to Montreal.

We managed to get a dual phone contract with Sprint on the day of arrival with some sweet talking from the Radioshack folks - there are so many foreign students in the USA with no credit history that phone contracts does seem to be something you can negotiate on.

We also had no problems opening an account at Bank of America with just a letter confirming salary and employment from DH's work.

Negotiate relocation terms before agreeing to anything. We negotiated on holiday (they initially offered 2 then settled on 3 weeks) and flights home (they were able to pay for 2round trips for the whole family in the first year, non thereafter) and assurance they'd start our GC applications within a year of arriving.

We live in LA which is prob comparable cost wise to SF. DH is paid much more here, some things are more expensive, some cheaper. There is no help with childcare until DC start at kindergarten aged 5

I've never been to Boston but sounds like California would really suit you!

We were just grappling with the same decision but to a different City. One thing we found really impacted us was the capital gains position. If we rented out our house in the UK, we would be taxed on the income in the US, which was fine, but if we sold it while living in the US we would also have to pay capital gains tax on it even though in the UK we wouldn't because it was our primary residence. There is an exemption, which is about $250k each, but unfortunately our gain would have been greater than that. Given our placement was only for a short time (2 years) it didn't seem worth it. If we had been going indefinitely I would probably have made a different decision. Also schools, it is important to live near a good school. There is plenty of info on the internet. If you are buying, check out the property taxes. If you are renting, it looks very expensive!

SF & entire Bay Area are notoriously expensive to live in outside of the areas that are considered slums. A Lot more expensive than Los Angeles.
Boston only somewhat less pricey (Harvard + MIT effect).
Oh yeah, you'll have to file complicated tax returns alright.
High property taxes is good, it means the local govt. schools are well funded.

Some comparative numbers for salaries.

DH & I have what I think of as a comfortable lifestyle (minimal mortgage, run 2 ok or good cars). One fairly expensive holiday every 4 yrs. We don't have expensive tastes so we can buy most things we'd like to have. We reckoned we'd both need to be earning > $70k to have a similar lifestyle in southern california, which is definitely cheaper than commuting distance to the City or Santa Clara valley.

Are your kids up to date with vaccinations? Can you prove it?

We don't own any property so hopefully that takes care of one lot of complications.
HolidayCriminal my DS is NOT fully vaccinated - will this stop us being granted visas?

nothing to do with visas, don't worry about that, lol.

It's schools, they demand jabs, although I don't know precisely which. I even got bumped off of University courses until I got my measles jab up to date. HepB & some R-virus, plus chickenpox, those are ones USA might demand you won't have yet. There are ways to get out of it, but not easy.

Yes I thought it might be a school requirement. I'm not too worried about that as at the moment we're only planning on going for a year or two so DS will most likely not have reached school age.

Nurseries might have same req, or clubs, preschools. But you may not get any issues.

We have been in the US for over 6 yrs but just moved to LA from Ohio last year. Both cities you are looking at are fantastic and offer amazing experiences for you all. Try real estate sites like Zillow to get an idea of house prices, etc. they also show school catchment areas and the ratings for the school. I know you don't have a school age child but a good rated school usually indicates an area with a family atmosphere, if that's something you look for.
Also remember that Cali is an even bigger time difference and longer, more expensive flights from home. Not a huge obstacle but worth thinking about if you are used to having a support network around you.
It's pretty scary when the prospect of moving so far comes up but treat it like the adventure it is and you'll have a great experience!

If the company, who are sponsoring you to move, mention Ares as your move management company, tell them no.
They really were a sack of shite!