Children's party invites

[Melly1234]

Hi fellow mums,

My 5 year old daughter is about to have her first big birthday party with friends and I'm unsure of the best way to invite her friends. Should I give her the invites to hand out at school to her friends? Or should I send the invites to her friends parents via email/text?

I'm unsure of the etiquette. Could someone help please?

Thank you :)

Where are you living?

In australia I learned the hard way that at age 5,6 and 7 parents stay.. siblings stay.. even last year at age 9 two mums stayed.. just in case dc needed the toilet ( to be escorted) in the bowling alley.... now they dont expect to be fed at least but in previous years parties have been very very xpensive . Prep year I invited the class and eneded up with 75 people the .. not the 25 kids i invited...but kids plus siblings plus parents (s)... never again... it was a bbq at home and ended up getting more sausages.. buns.. party food... bags... OMG... nearly died! DDs 4th party was in the Uk and only 2 parents stayed...at a play centre... so different...

I am in the US and always email using the PTA Directory. Be aware though, if you are here, that half the blardy parents will not respond at all - drives me up the wall! My best one was a mother who, having been sent a reminder email as she didn't reply to the first one, rang on the morning of the party and demanded of DH whether the party was still happening, "because I got two invitations and didn't know what was going on". Because, obviously, two invitations cancel each other out or something...

We're in Oz too and would second what chloe says - I was surprised that parents expected to stay at parties for 6 and 7 year olds, but luckily had become aware of it before I hosted one. I turned it into a bit of a social occasion and it was pool party for the girls, drinks and nibbles for the adults. Knowing in advance that it was a chance for a chat and a glass of fizz the mums all left siblings, who were inevitably younger, at home and i just didn't invite the child whose mum rocked up to every party with her very badly behaved younger child and expected them to be fully involved. (Obviously not an option if it's a whole class party). There is very little expectation of proper food for the kids which is great.

We are absolutely not allowed to distribute party invites at school, children or parents - we do have a full contact list though so most get posted, some e-mailed.

I just hosted a 4 year old birthday party in the US. I didn't invite all of the class (there are 20+ children and my child barely knows any of them. It ended up as about 12 kids with siblings. Some did drop off most didn't (I didn't mind either way as long as child was okay with being left, all of them were). I used evite, everyone I invited responded. It worked out well.

It depends a lot on where you are.

Having said that I've had from just a text to a train shaped box with 5 cookies, toys and an invitation hand delivered to the door.