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Life-limiting illness

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Original poster

Stomach, liver & Lymph nodes cancer

87 replies

MouldyOldey · 24/09/2021 19:39

Hi. My mum has been ill for a while. They said it was cancer of the lymph nodes but that was the secondary one, so after having every test in the world (it feels like!) They have now said it's stomach & liver & possibly bowel as well (they want to check her bowel still)

I'm not sure what I want from this thread really other than somebody to talk to.

This is bad, isn't it? She isn't going to survive this is she? I feel like I can only ask her so many questions as I don't want to make her talk about it unless she wants to.

Is anybody there?

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aibusux2u · 24/09/2021 19:46

Sorry you are going through this.

I don't have anything useful to offer but didn't want to read and run.

Have you tried reaching out to Macmillan? They have a phoneline and there is also an online community.

www.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-information-and-support/get-help

All the best to you both. Flowers

Batshittery · 24/09/2021 19:54

Sorry your mum and you are going through this. Try not to think the worst until you know everything. Your DM will need time to process the information herself. There are all sorts of treatment available.
As PP said, Macmillan are very helpful. You can join their forums and ask questions there if you think it may help, but every person has different symptoms and treatment. I hope the news isn't as bad as you fear Thanks

Original poster
MouldyOldey · 24/09/2021 19:56

Thank you aibusu that's kind of you. I was looking at Macmillan earlier.

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Original poster
MouldyOldey · 24/09/2021 19:58

Thanks Batshittery. She said that the Dr said it was worse than he had hoped but she is going to start some chemo tablets.

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Batshittery · 24/09/2021 20:57

Let's hope the chemo tablets manage to halt any progression Mouldy

Original poster
MouldyOldey · 24/09/2021 21:37

Thanks Batshittery but I think, as the cancer in the lymph nodes is secondary, then things are already pretty bad.

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BeautifulTulips · 24/09/2021 22:11

I'm sorry you have this news. As a pp has mentioned McMillan should be able to support you. I found their helpline very supportive. Also ask if the hospital has a specialist cancer nurse – my dad has cancer and the specialist nurse been very helpful for us. They helped me to get him a blue badge which has really helped with his declining mobility . I really hope that the news is not as bad as you fear Thanks

Original poster
MouldyOldey · 24/09/2021 22:29

Thanks BeautifulTulips. I probably will contact them I just don't feel quite able to yet.

I hope things are ok with your dad & thank you for taking the time to postFlowers

I wish I could drive but I can't afford to learn, I know that if I could get mum to her appointment's it would take some of her worry away.

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Shieldingending · 25/09/2021 08:18

The first time I contacted them I mostly cried down the phone, they are used to this and will be very supportive and kind to you. Thanks with my dad are stable which is much better than we would’ve hoped for two years ago when I was in the situation you are in now when his spinal cancer was discovered. There are some amazing treatments now and I hope that your mum is able to benefit from them. Look after yourself too

Original poster
MouldyOldey · 25/09/2021 08:51

Thank you. I'm glad your dad is doing well, that's nice to hear.

My dad died years ago from stomach cancer so I'm trying not to ask 'Is it the same situation as dad's?' But my mum did say that treatments have moved on a lot since my dad.

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Giveronyoursausage · 25/09/2021 08:59

I'm so sorry and this is something you probably don't want to hear I lost my brother to that type of cancer it was 12 months exactly from diagnosis to death and it had spread to his brain at the end. I'm praying things will be different for you and your family.

Original poster
MouldyOldey · 25/09/2021 09:07

Aww I'm so sorry GiveronyoursausageFlowers Thank you for posting. I hope you are ok.
I don't mind, I know the outcome isn't looking good, I've googled (a little, just to get a vague idea)

Did your brother have the same 3 types of cancer?

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Giveronyoursausage · 25/09/2021 09:18

Unfortunately yes he did .He had chemo which did shrink it and it remained stable for roughly 6 months but after that his health just seemed to go on a downward spiral and they couldn't get on top of his pain relief so he really did suffer but he was always the one who didn't make a fuss and I think he downplayed about how much pain he was really in. It will be 3 years this Christmas for us.

bloodywhitecat · 25/09/2021 09:24

My husband has bile duct cancer, it is in his lymph nodes and his liver. He had chemo which helped for a while but the tumours are now growing again. The prognosis for his cancer is poor and I have found Macmillan bloody useless but we do have a good local charity who have helped us a lot. At the moment DH is leading a relatively normal life so a diagnosis like your mum's is not all doom and gloom. My best advice would be to not be scared to seek a second opinion if her cancer is a less common one. If I can help please PM me.

Original poster
MouldyOldey · 25/09/2021 09:35

Thank you Giveronyoursausage Sounds like he was extremely braveFlowers
I do appreciate you talking to me.
My mum is fine at the moment apart from being tired.

Thanks bloodywhitecat Yes things are relatively 'normal' at the moment. I'm glad your DH is doing well ATM tooFlowers
I'm also glad you have found a nice local charity. They do amazing work don't they.

It feels like it is taking ages to get things properly diagnosed but my mum said that she mentioned this to the nurse & they said that it reaally hasnt been long at all.

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bloodywhitecat · 25/09/2021 09:39

DH first got sick in May of last year, we were told it was cancer very early on but it took until Oct to get his diagnosis. The poor man had more botched biopsies than you could shake a stick at. Don't be afraid to fight your mum's corner Flowers

Giveronyoursausage · 25/09/2021 09:39

If ever you need a chat just pm me x

Lotsofpots · 25/09/2021 09:52

Hi @MouldyOldey I'm so sorry you're going through this. There is a thread for those of us who have parents with cancer, if you'd find it useful:

Thread for those who have a parent with cancer? http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/lifelimitingg_illness/4332263-Thread-for-those-who-have-a-parent-with-cancer

Original poster
MouldyOldey · 25/09/2021 10:02

Thanks bloodywhitecat My mum went to the GP in June (after a lot of persuasion)
they said secondary cancer & they've been trying to find out where the original cancer was since then.

Thank you Lotsofpots

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olidora63 · 25/09/2021 23:44

Am sorry about your Mum ….hopefully she will get a diagnosis Asap! It is awful that it is taking so long ,bless you.Reach out to any local charities and Macmillan 💐

Original poster
MouldyOldey · 26/09/2021 09:23

Thank you olidora. I think it's about the same timescale as as bloodywhitecat so far, so its probably 'Normal'.
Hopefully this bowel test won't take too long, then we have to wait for the results & then finally get on with treatment.

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Summerdayshaze · 26/09/2021 22:18

My mum was diagnosed with stomach cancer which had spread to her liver. She was also given palliative chemo tablets. She lasted four months and was in a bad way. I’m very sorry about your mum. X

Original poster
MouldyOldey · 27/09/2021 12:32

Summerdayshaze Thank you for posting. I'm really sorry you lost your mum. I hope you are okFlowers

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Original poster
MouldyOldey · 16/05/2022 10:29

Anybody around for a chat?

I've not posted for a while but thought I'd stay on the same thread.

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Original poster
MouldyOldey · 16/05/2022 14:00

I'm deliberately not going to Google.

Why would you need an ECG for stomach pain? ECG is heart isn't it?

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