I need some support, please. Pancreatic cancer in DF. Long, sorry.

[mineofuselessinformation]

My DF has pancreatic cancer.
Diagnosed last week.
Stent into gall bladder attempted earlier this week, not successful.
DF has had a bleed which was found this morning. Now having a total of five units of blood and god knows what else. He's really unwell, and for a man who's never really ailed anything in his life has been brought really low, it's worrying that he's so weak.
He faces being sent to another hospital for a different type of stent via the liver.
I'm trying to support my DParents whilst relaying news to my siblings who live overseas, and am trying to carry on working (I don't want to ask for too much as they're very supportive at the moment), so am working mornings, then going to get DM, take her to the hospital (she can't drive that far), and then come home to relay news to siblings and answer questions.
I honestly don't know how long I can go in like this - it feels never-ending (and I've been handed a pack of useful information with leaflets of symptoms, how to get help via Macmillan etc.) DParents didn't want to take it, I didn't either, really.
Has anyone else been here?
Sorry for the long, rambly disjointed post.
I had a thread here before, which I can't face trying to link on the app.

So sorry to read that your DF is now in ITU sending you and both of your parents {{{cyberhugs}}}

IME it is the time to tell your other siblings/family members that he is now in ITU then the decision is up to them if/when they come over

Am so sorry to hear that he is now so poorly. We are all thinking of you x

Just read the thread and sending you a big hug. I used to be a specialist nurse looking after patients with pancreatic cancer so have seen how hideous it can be.
Do you have support from an upper gi nurse or palliative care nurse?

I hope you are managing to sleep. When my Gran went she was admitted to a hospice Monday lunchtime and fell asleep forever on the Tuesday eve. I hadn't slept since 4am Monday morning. I didn't leave her side.

I hope he had a peaceful night

Sorry to hear your dad is so poorly. Thinking of you all.

We spent the night with him. There is no change in his condition. Poor DM is exhausted so we have come home for the night. Dsis is here too and has spoken to him.
We will go back in the morning.

I'm glad to hear you have come home for the night Mine, it's exhausting and you need to get some rest when you can.

I'm just so sorry you're going through this, you're all very much in my thoughts. I hope you DF is free from pain and is comfortable.

For all of you

November is Pancreatic Cancer Awareness month and on 17th November many landmarks will be 'going purple' for World Pancreatic Cancer Day.

pancreaticcanceraction.org/support-us/awareness-month/world-pancreatic-cancer-day-2/

I'm very sorry to hear of your situation. DMIL died of this horrific disease two years ago. Try to look after your eves and DM too.

DF passed away this morning, only 26 days after his diagnosis. Far too soon, but at least his end was peaceful.

So sorry to read this mine, it must be such a shock for you. Have been where you are right now and remember looking out of the window and feeling disbelief that the world was still carrying on when my world had stopped.

Sending you an unmumsnetty hug and I'm glad the end was as peaceful as it could be. He'll always be with you, he is part of you and that wont ever change.

Thinking of you. Thankfully it was peaceful.

Sadly with pancreatic cancer it is usually too late after diagnosis.

I'm so sorry . How terribly quick, what a shock for you all. Hope you can now take some time to focus on yourselves and DM.

I'm terribly sorry to read your sad news, my sincere condolences, it's a horrible disease. Lost my mother to PC in 2009.

Please don't feel you need to rush anything. One often feels that things should be done, tidied, arranged, sorted.

In fact, except for the funeral, nothing needs to be done, so give yourself time to grieve (although that never goes away anyway) and don't feel pressured to do stuff you (or your mum) are not ready for.

I am so sorry 🌺

Oh I'm so sorry.

So sorry for your loss.

So sorry to read that mine That is desperately quick. My condolences to you, your mum and all your family.

mine I've just read through your thread and want to say how very sorry I am about your DF.

I lost my aunt to this horrible disease some years ago, again it was terribly quick after diagnosis.

My condolences to you & your family

I'm so very sorry to hear this. Look after yourself x

So sorry to read your dad has died. Didn't post before but you have been on my mind. Take care

So sorry to hear your news, it has happened all so quickly for you and your family...you must be in shock. I have been thinking about you
Be kind to yourself and take your time , your dad is no longer suffering

Thank you all so much for your kind words - mumsnet at its best and most caring. I'm very grateful.
to everyone affected by this truly terrible disease.

So sorry for your loss. Hugs. Go gently on yourself the next few days xxx