Terrified of losing children 😞

[charM89]

Okay here's my story any advice please...
I'm private renting, our landlord is evicting us for 2 reasons...
he's selling (no argument ofcourse I understand he needs/wants to sell)
ground 13- we have deteriorated the condition of the property (this one I'm arguing here's why)
We have lived in the property for 10 years, we have had many structual repairs that needed doing, I approached the landlord who told us that due to us not ventilating property it's caused the damp and mould.
I went and bought dehumidifiers, opened windows etc... cleaned all the mould off however the mould would always return!
I called environmental health round an improvement notice was served to the landlord, he was advised of every repair that himself as a landlord needed to fix!
However this was not followed up as the envirmental health officer at the time passed away.
However the landlord was still aware of the problems and chose to not do them!
I contacted environmental health again recently as the damp,mould and other issues were still not resolving no matter how much we cleaned the mould or using a dehumidifier.
A new improvement notice was served to the landlord.
He has now issued us with a section 8 notice using grounds 1a and 13 :(
Again I'm not arguing that he needs to sell, but ground 13 I find extremely unfair as most of the condtion of this property is down to him!
He is now also increasing our rent :(
Ofcourse there are days we forget to open windows and we don't always keep the home to a high level of cleaning, I have depression and anxiety (have done since my son passed) my partner is autistic our 4 year old is autistic and I have a typical teenager!
If we're found to be intentionally homeless due to ground 13 the council won't help us and we are passed to social services which could mean we lose our children :(

My personal opinion is you will be staying longer with your parents than you anticipate - depending on your LA social housing and how many private landlords there are.
Anxiety is horrendous - I get it. I too have to think of the worst case scenario in things just to feel prepared. Your dc won’t be taken off you if they are looked after fed etc. Try and focus on what you can do - talk to your LA housing. They should have a list of LLs they liaise with who don’t advertise on the open market (they do in my town anyway)

What if who doesn't?
Social services don't have housing. If they absolutely need to, they will find it, and pay deposit/first month rent etc. The contract will be with the council, and you pay towards the rent. I don't understand what question you are asking.

Sorry I mean if we were intentionally homeless and social couldn't find anywhere even private they just didn't have any options that's what I mean?

Surely it will be the LA who help you with any housing issue? SS won’t i dont think - they don’t have any housing stock. All they want to know is your dc are fed, have a roof over their head and are safe?

If we're found to be intentionally homeless the la will have no duty to house us.

What has the council said to you since you sent the eviction notice to them? Why are you ignoring this question?

I'm not ignoring any question, I just clearly never saw it!

My housing officer has said "he wouldn't make an intentional homeless decision when the primary reason is the landlord is selling"

What have housing specifically said to you? Have they told you how they will decide if you are intentionally homeless or not? I understand you are panicking, but you need to break it down so people can advise you properly. When you called your LA housing department what did they say? If you haven’t called them sue to your anxiety can someone call on your behalf?

What else has your Housing Officer said about how things will happen moving forward?

So why are you still panicking?

My housing officer has ofc advised to look for another private accommodation, I'm doing this everyday.

He advised that as the landlord wants to sell anyway, he wouldn't see us as intentionally homeless.

Plus I have mental health needs, my partner and 4 year old are both autistic.

Our rent is completely up to date, the landlord has now increased our rent however it will still be paid.

My fear is if the landlord gets possession back through ground 13 (where the tenant allowed the property to deteriorate) then we would be seen as intentionally homeless and ofc social would be involved.

All I know is I can provide accommodation for my children, my rent is paid every single month on time!
Our place isn't always spotless, I have physical needs due to nerve damage and my partner being autistic tries to clean to the best he can.

But not being extremely clean doesn't give the landlord the right to evict us in my opinion

The main source of damp and mould is in my daughters bedroom (the landlord was advised in 2024 by a contractor that the radiator in this room is too small) however he ignored it.
The window in that room is blown, the damp and mould would just constantly come back, I bought dehumidifiers but still returned.

I contacted environmental health again and the landlord has been issued with a new improvement notice.
Now the landlord is using ground 13 to evict us he's also using the ground he wants to sell I'm completely understanding of this.

He says he's been wanting to sell for years however he has issued us 2 section 21s in the past both invalid as he never gave the gas certificates council told us this.

I'm sorry but if a landlord is so desperate to sell then he would makesure the section 21s are valid.

The landlord becomes aggressive if I try to talk to him, he even raised his voice to my 16 year old daughter!
I felt I couldn't reason with him as he just kept on constantly blaming our lifestyle for the damp and mould even though environmental health said otherwise.

They would. It would not be very nice or luxurious but they would find a roof to go over your heads.

Right so why are you still panicking?

You are catastrophising. The council will support you (as will SS if they end up getting involved) what everyone wants to happen is you and your family to be housed whether it is with your parents or in a b&b. Has anyone specifically said to you that SS will take your children off you?

Honestly it's having a plan for worse case scenario, such as if social are involved I don't care where we are as long as my children were with us

An early help worker told me that they will explore all options if the options all were unsuccessful then the children could be taken

Are we all getting confused with what the OP means about ‘social’?

Op who do you specifically mean when you say ‘social’ do you mean the Local Authority or Social Services? It would be helpful if you could be specific to get the right support. Who exactly has given you the impression you could lose your children? Not from your thoughts or your anxiety - which professional has led you to believe thus could happen?

An early help worker definitely told you that you could lose your children?

Why are you posting as you're not listening to anyone? You've admitted not understanding the process as well.

Just speak to the council, as well as looking for private rented properties, and go from there. You need to just try to sort your new home and stop focusing on why your landlord wants to evict. He clearly wants to sell, he's been telling you this for ages (albeit with incorrect paperwork).

Focus on what you need to do to get a new property.

(Autistic doesn't mean you can't keep a house clean, by the way.)

But you have your parents' house as a last resort.

Do you have anybody a bit calmer who can advocate for you?

Ask your early years helper to put in writing exactly what they said to you. Not because I disbelieve you but I know with anxiety one can misconstrue what is being said. Were you alone when they said this or was your partner there?

This is a good idea - I think you need someone to help you understand all of this.Can your parents help?

OP - be honest are you hoping for social housing? No judgement here as I had to rely on it. After my nightmare I was lucky to be housed and work full time and pay the rent myself. But you have to open and honest about what you are expecting. My dc and I were placed in a b&b that was 1 1/2 hours away from their school on public transport and we had to be out of the b&b between the hours 9-5 with only shared cooking facilities. I did it with my 4dc on my own (1 autistic) then we got offered a house and I dragged myself up with every ounce in me. I panicked like you. I had to learn to engage and at those times when I couldn’t engage I gave all professionals permission to speak to someone else on my behalf. It is doable. Where is your partner in all this? What is he doing to help?

From different websites and what people are telling me, if I cant provide accommodation for my children then they would be taken.

So nobody from the council or SS has told you this?