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Legal matters

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Can I lose my house?

81 replies

Domingofromltoakley · 26/03/2026 21:13

My DH is currently trying to get a financial order with his ex, I know he should have done it years ago, but she's always made life so difficult it's taken years to get this far. He's had to go to court twice already to get her to engage at all, she has form for this as she refused to engage with divorce or return papers etc and cost a fortune to eventually divorce.
Anyway he is now at the second lot of mediation, he's paying for his, she's on legal aid, he's returned his form E which shows he has nothing of value but a 10 year old car no savings really and we're living in my DG house which she kindly let us use when she moved in with my parents until she dies and its sold for the beneficiaries.
I own a house, well its got a large mortgage and a massive loan attached to my parents they lent me money in order to buy it. It's in my name only as I lived there before I met DP, he has never contributed to the mortgage or upkeep that has always come out of my personal account, and now the mediator wants it valued. Surely this isn't a marital asset of theirs that he has to share? Mediator hasn't even asked for the equity(little to none) just the value. Why do I have to get it valued when their FO has nothing to do with me?

OP posts:
LilyBunch25 · 26/03/2026 21:16

Sounds odd- surely its nothing to do with their financial settlement?

wishfulthinking25 · 26/03/2026 21:16

I have no professional input to add however, my SIL was due to get remarried and she cancelled it last minute as they sought legal advice and due to not having a financial order in place was told that if she got married then her exH could come after everything her (would’ve been) new DH owned too. Again, I’m not sure if this is true or not but it’s what she told me.

yeesh · 26/03/2026 21:17

Are you married? You say DH and DP

Chewbecca · 26/03/2026 21:17

Are you married to him or not?

Domingofromltoakley · 26/03/2026 21:21

Yes we're married but the house was mine before we met. It was never their marital home and he never contributed to it. He isn't on the deeds

OP posts:
RoseField1 · 26/03/2026 21:22

Please say you didn't marry a man who hadn't completed his financial order with his ex wife?

WallaceinAnderland · 26/03/2026 21:28

It's because you're married.

MrsKateColumbo · 26/03/2026 21:33

Oh dear, have you been married long? I think you need professional advice asap

Octavia64 · 26/03/2026 21:35

You are fucked.

get legal advice asap

Domingofromltoakley · 26/03/2026 21:37

Thete is no equity in the house. How can this be a problem?

OP posts:
Ophy83 · 26/03/2026 21:38

I don't think your house is up for grabs, but it is relevant to the split of their assets if your dh is financially secure because of his marriage to you

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 26/03/2026 21:39

Following.

Domingofromltoakley · 26/03/2026 21:40

There is literally no assets. He owns a 10 year old car, they had a council house which she kept including the contents, no savings, no pension.

OP posts:
JehovasFitness · 26/03/2026 21:41

I too don’t think your house is up for grabs but it is relevant that your husband has somewhere secure to live.

Wickedlittledancer · 26/03/2026 21:46

If you’re married it is a marital asset.

Soontobe60 · 26/03/2026 21:47

If he and his ex didn’t own their own house, and your house has little to no equity in it, then she can’t claim anything really. Does he have a workplace pension? Does she? Why is she getting legal aid?

Doggymummar · 26/03/2026 21:49

The house goes in the pot unfortunately for you. I was advised not to complete a divorce without a financial order in place and certainly not to remarry.

My last divorce was 15 years ago so things may have changed maybe post in legal?

feralballerina · 26/03/2026 21:52

Kind of unrelated but if you are living rent free in one house how are you not managing to chip away at all the debt on the other one? Can't you rent it out?

BringBackCatsEyes · 26/03/2026 21:53

Yikes. They were ill-advised to get the decree absolute before the financial order and you were ill-advised to get married w/o that in place.

MooseBeTimeForSnow · 26/03/2026 21:54

Was the Form E just for mediation purposes or have financial proceedings actually been issued? I understood that once you have remarried you can’t issue an application to the court.

feralballerina · 26/03/2026 21:54

And if he doesn't have to pay for mortgage or rent then how does he have no savings and no pension?

I can't imagine getting to live somewhere rent free and not building any financial cushion

BringBackCatsEyes · 26/03/2026 21:56

This is what AI has to say about the matter:
I can see why this feels frustrating — especially when you’ve kept everything clearly separate. The short answer is: your house is very unlikely to be treated as a marital asset to be shared, but it can still be relevant information in his financial disclosure, which is why the mediator has asked for a valuation.
Let me break it down in plain terms 👇
🧾 Why they’re asking about your house
In a UK financial order, both parties must give a full financial picture — not just what they own, but also:

  • Where they live
  • Their outgoings
  • Their financial support or arrangements
  • Any assets they might have access to (even indirectly)
So even though:
  • The house is in your name only
  • You bought it before the relationship
  • He has never contributed financially
👉 It can still be considered part of his “financial circumstances”, not his assets. That’s an important distinction. ⚖️ Is your house a “marital asset”? Based on what you’ve said, it’s very unlikely:
  • Pre-owned before the relationship ✅
  • Sole name ownership ✅
  • No financial contribution from him ✅
  • You’ve kept finances separate ✅
➡️ In UK family law, that normally means it’s non-matrimonial property, and his ex would have no claim over it. 🤔 So why does the mediator want a valuation? This is usually about context, not division. For example:
  1. Living situation
They want to understand:
  • Does he have secure housing?
  • Is he effectively being supported by you?
  1. Ability to rehouse
If his ex is making claims (e.g. for money or housing needs), they’ll look at:
  • Whether he needs money to house himself
  • Or whether he’s already accommodated (e.g. living with a partner)
  1. Transparency
Courts are very strict on full disclosure. Even irrelevant things often get listed just to avoid future disputes. 🚫 What they cannot do (based on your facts) They generally cannot:
  • Force you to sell your house
  • Treat it as his asset to divide
  • Award part of it to his ex
Unless there were very unusual circumstances (like deliberate financial mixing or hiding assets), which doesn’t sound like your situation at all. ⚠️ One small thing to be aware of Even though she can’t claim your house, the court can take into account that:
  • He has housing provided via you
  • Therefore, his financial needs may be considered lower
That could affect:
  • Whether she gets more (if she claims need)
  • Or whether he gets less
But that’s about needs assessment, not ownership. ✅ What you can do
  • Provide a basic valuation (even an estate agent estimate is often enough)
  • Make sure it’s clearly stated:
  • It’s solely yours
  • Bought before the relationship
  • He has no beneficial interest
  • If needed, he can add a short statement clarifying this in his Form E
💬 Bottom line
  • You’re not being dragged into the divorce financially
  • Your house isn’t “up for grabs”
  • This is about disclosure and context, not division
Domingofromltoakley · 26/03/2026 22:03

Thank you this is very helpful in understanding why I've been asked this

OP posts:
UraniumFlowerpot · 26/03/2026 22:04

.

MrsKateColumbo · 26/03/2026 22:05

You may also need to take advice if you are due to inherit part of Granny's house in case she dies before it's all sorted.