expecting a baby, not married - what legal protections do i need?

[firsttimepregnanthelp]

As per the title really. Bf and I haven't been together long and aren't married; we don't plan to marry anytime soon as things stand. Both have savings and assets. I have been looking into getting a joint life first death policy. What else should I be considering?

Consider whose names are on birth certificate
Make a will
Protect your own savings, you never know what will happen in the future
What assets do you have, do you have your own home

Why not just get married?

Give the baby your surname.

There is nothing that gives you the same legal protection that marriage does.

BUT, it depends on the situation.

If you have your own home, money, assets, savings etc and are not going to be reliant on this man or his finances/home then marriage isn’t be all and end all.

Get your own pension. If you split up I don't think you can claim any of his, you maybe able to if married.

You and your partner will both have 50% parental rights over your child. Should you not stay together you will both have equal say on your child’s life and you are both entitled to have your child 50% of the time. The law no longer favours the Mother. There is nothing legal you can put in place to give yourself more rights to your child unless there is a serious issue with your partner. Should you split up try to remain on good terms for your child.

During maternity leave make sure you don’t pay for everything from your savings. And ditto when you go back to work - you are not personally responsible for the cost of childcare. He should pay more so that you can build up the pension contributions you missed out on while you are on mat leave (unless you decide to share the parental leave)

Sit down together and work out how you’re going to do finances and budgeting.

If you’re not married then Whats yours is yours and Whats his is his. Even if you split. There’s no financial settlement requirement, either one of you can legally walk away at anytime with whatever is in your own name.

Lost income on Mat Leave or Shared Parental Leave is a child raising cost.

Thanks everyone, I have my own home and so does he., he is going to support me on mat leave. He has no pension so I am better off in that respect.

Are you giving the baby your name?

Make sure you stay in work. If you decrease any hours, make sure that you make up the difference with additional pension contributions. If you separate there is no financial protection for you. Make sure he has no rights to your property, it needs to be clear that any support payments are for maternity leave and the child.

I would just say to the quote above, if you go PT at work make sure HE, or at least the joint pot, makes up your pension contributions.

@pinkyredrose will double barrel.

@HarryVanderspeigle how do I make up the difference with additional pension contributions when I will be earning less?

Baby needs your surname tbh - it makes it a hell of alot easier. If he doesn't like that he can consider taking your last name if you marry

You don't - he needs to paying pension contributions for you.

Also what will the living situation be?

You may want to think about a power of attorney incase you become incapacitated while pregnant.

if something happens to you without one the babies dad won’t be able to make decisions and he doesn’t automatically have parental rights.

@sickleaveornot how does he pay my contributions for me if they are usually taken from my wages? Sorry, this is all alien to me. We will be living together in his house, I am not sure what I will do with mine. I am also wondering about next of kin? I would like to be each other's so that if one of us dies the other gets our assets etc to support baby.

@Wolfpa I will be putting him on the birth certificate

‘Next of kin’ has no legal basis.
If either of you have death in service benefits, you have to nominate each other to receive any payout, however in reality this could mean that the surviving parent could take all the money and spend it in whatever - you may consider having your child as beneficiary. This again, however, can have its drawbacks.
You would both need well drawn up wills but still be aware that either of you could change your will without the other person knowing.

@Soontobe60 thank you, I will definitely be careful with the will - I suppose I'd like it to give me the same protections that marriage does if that would be possible?

Just get married if you want the same legal protection.

But you dont have to marry if you have income and assets yourself
Just keep working. Keep your assets.
Share childcare costs

What's the size of his estate? There is nothing you can put in place to mirror the inheritance tax spousal exemptions outside of marriage.

Re pension, you just make direct contributions if that's what you want to do but you need to be aware of the limits. You should have details of your pension scheme explaining how to do that - you should get a letter each year detailing your contributions and the value of your fund etc. That will have the info you need. Otherwise you can set up a separate private pension.

Did you realise that you will need his consent, or court approval, to move some distance away with your child? You can move yourself - but you can't move your child.
So if you have plans to live close to family, move before your child is born. Otherwise it could be difficult and drawn out.

Make sure you know his NI number - makes applying for child maintenance much easier.

You should both have wills.
You can leave your assets to each other, or to your child.
If you leave to your child, it will be held "on trust" (a special legal arrangement) until they are 18 (or to the age you specify in your will - eg you can specify older if you want them to be wiser before they get control of the capital) . In the meantime, the trustee decides how to use the money for their best interest. You can leCe some guidance in a letter of wishes that is kept in a safe place with your will

re will - remember there is no guarantee that his Will will match your will. It might start off like that, but he can change his Will whenever he wants without your permission.