partner has our child and is refusing to return to the UK

[davejohns]

So we went for a holiday to her home country in the EU, and I had to return a week early for work reasons. On the eve that she and our child was suppose to fly back, she said didn't want to come back. I'm trying to keep things amicable at the moment and intend to fly back out there and resolve things, and is it stands we are not separated, but if that falls apart legally is that still abduction if I do not consent to our child not returning?

This is a very stressful time for me. Thanks for reading

[CloseYourEyesAndSee]

Assuming the country is in The Hague convention, yes. You'd need to go to court here to apply for an order of some kind. You need legal advice.

[davejohns]

Yes, I intend to do that. It's just I'm trying to be understanding with her at the moment. As a father with joint parental responsibility I'm worried it'll won't work in my favour and make things worse once courts are involved.

[Feelingoktoday]

I think you get out there ASAP ie now and talk to her to find out what is going on. If she refuses to change her mind you need to get legal advice ASAP. You are the child’s father I assume? Courts will not be impressed with your partner I’m sure.

[davejohns]

If this can't be resolved amicably, is there no deadline or anything like that. For example, if we can't resolve this months down the line, as long as i refuse permission its still abduction?

[davejohns]

And yes I am the father.

[PaddingtonBearStareAgain]

You need to get urgent legal asvice

[davejohns]

i will ring a solicitors tomorrow. I'm just worried that if this gets messy I'll never see my child again.😓

[spotcheck]

Is she refusing to return ever, or is she just wanting to stay with her family for awhile more?

[davejohns]

refusing to return ever but is happy for me to move over to be with them.

[MoveBitch]

Was this spoken about before, or just completely out of the blue?
Also how old is the child?

[oviraptor21]

What country are your child and the mother in?

[davejohns]

She's said how unhappy she is living in the UK, but this was pretty much out of the blue. At the very least I'd expect her to return and discuss things.

[oviraptor21]

childlawadvice.org.uk/information-pages/abduction/

[davejohns]

so this is abduction yes?

[oviraptor21]

It sounds like it could be.
No. 2 - wrongful retention on the link above

[Pinotpleasure]

@davejohns - please do look at this website from “Reunite International” - the British charity which helps parents involved in international child abduction and custody disputes.

They also have an advice (phone) line and a list of solicitors who are experienced in this field:

www.reunite.org

All the best for a speedy and amicable resolution.

[Wallywobbles]

Speed is of the essence at the beginning of situations like this. And work is really not a good enough reason to not be out there and seeing a lawyer. I'm not sure if you'd need to see one here or there.

You will need a specialist lawyer. And preferably one that deals with the right country. Tell us which one and someone will be able to give you more help.

I live abroad and I always knew I'd lose my kids if I tried to leave the country permanently with them.

[davejohns]

The reason I haven't done so immediately is that we haven't separated yet. Are you saying by committing abduction that could mean the mother could lose custody in the UK courts?

[dreamersdown]

You need to answer the questions people are asking you if you want good advice.

• what country are they in?
• what nationality is your child?
• are you married?
• are you on the birth certificate?

[davejohns]

@dreamersdown

You need to answer the questions people are asking you if you want good advice.

• what country are they in?
• what nationality is your child?
• are you married?
• are you on the birth certificate?

PL
Dual Citizenship
No
Yes (shared parental responsibility)

[Wakemeup17]

Why does she not want to return?
What was the relationship like back in the UK.
If there was abuse in the relationship ship that she can prove it will not be that straightforward to get the kids back to the UK if that's what you want.

[davejohns]

She is homesick. The relationship has been strained with this pressure but there was no abuse in the relationship.

[Wakemeup17]

@davejohns

The reason I haven't done so immediately is that we haven't separated yet. Are you saying by committing abduction that could mean the mother could lose custody in the UK courts?

It's unlikely she will lose custody.

[mathanxiety]

What precisely do you mean by 'strained'?

And are you on the birth cert?

[davejohns]

just the normal stresses of having a baby and her homesickness. and yes i'm on the birth certificate. I state that already.