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Legal matters

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have any legal concerns we suggest you consult a solicitor.

Original poster

Does my brother still have to pay children maintainer for his 17 year old working son?

243 replies

Nikki037297 · 07/02/2022 07:07

My brother has a son who is 17 and is working part time and at college part time. His ex is demanding money as my brother is just going back to work after being on the sick after an accident at work and breaking a bone in his neck and not being able to work for around 20 months now. He’s googled it and can’t find much out and it seams a bit complicated and never mentions the child working and what would happen in those circumstances. Does anyone know ?

OP posts:
forinborin · 07/02/2022 10:20

We've got a country which is on its knees after the pandemic and with a looming social care crisis, and yet it's somehow acceptable for the taxpayer to take up parental responsibility.
At no point has it been said on the thread that the mother relies on the taxpayer to take up parental responsibility. Why this assumption that all single parents are living off the generous taxpayer? Most I know don't claim a penny in benefits.

Skilovingmama · 07/02/2022 10:21

@endlesssighing

Dad of the year award goes to…..

He’s still a child. He has to pay until he’s 18. No part time job will negate that. Does his mother no longer provide food/housing/clothing etc or is it just your brother who thinks he doesn’t have to pay?

Incorrect. Liability is until 16 and then after that it depends on what he is doing but could last until 20 if in FTE.
CanofCant · 07/02/2022 10:21

Mumsnet needs a tiny violin emoji.

P.S. Your 'brother' is a dick.

DrSbaitso · 07/02/2022 10:23

Nobody is saying it’s a substitute but legal advice is expensive and many can’t afford it. Also, there are a number of regular posters like@prh47bridgewho are legal professionals but give up their time to help people. I am also a qualified solicitor but am non-practising. There is plenty of really good advice on here that helps people who otherwise wouldn’t get that help.

We don't know that you or anyone else is a solicitor. You are an anonymous Internet person and it would be foolish for anyone to take what you say without checking it out elsewhere. Citizens Advice is a good place to go if the fees are prohibitive.

The point is, you can't post on a public forum, even one dedicated to legal matters - in fact, especially one dedicated to legal matters - and assume thar everything you're told is definitely true, even if posters claim to be qualified experts. And you certainly can't expect people to hold their tongues on what they really think of you. That's one thing professionals, properly accessed, are paid to do and you don't get it for free on an Internet forum.

Citygirl2019 · 07/02/2022 10:24

College might appear part time but it is likely to be a full time course. Part time work for young people at this age is usually for extra pocket money.

racingnowhere · 07/02/2022 10:25

Nobody is saying it’s a substitute but legal advice is expensive and many can’t afford it. Also, there are a number of regular posters like @prh47bridge who are legal professionals but give up their time to help people. I am also a qualified solicitor but am non-practising

You are not just providing impartial legal advice though @Skilovingmama You are criticising people, and in quite a sneery way, for expressing their opinions. You can choose to use this page to give free legal advice if you want. The fact that you choose to do that in no way means the rest of us should not express our opinions on what many of us consider to be a serious social issue that exacerbates inequality for women and causes real hardship.

Putting ' Legal Matters' at the top of a page does not mean any of us are bound by any professional code of conduct. Its still just a social media site. That should not need to be explained.

Anyway, the hypocrisy of you being unable to hold your tongue on your view of people posting their opinions here, yet expecting women to hold their tongues about a working man seeking ways to get out of paying for his own child.

ChargingBuck · 07/02/2022 10:25

So your brother paid fuck-all toward his own child for 20 months while he was "on the sick"?

Has been a father for 17 years, yet still doesn't know how child maintenance works?
Is unable to google up the CMS website & work it out?
And would prefer to stop paying toward his own child's subsistence, so gets his sister to run to mumsnet to find out if he can continue shirking?

He sounds a delight.
So do you OP - what with your accusation about your nephew's mother demanding money. Money which is for her son, not herself. The son she's paid for single handedly for the last 20 months.

endlesssighing · 07/02/2022 10:26

@Skilovingmama

I meant in relation to the OP. His part time job doesn’t negate his dad’s financial responsibility. He has to keep paying until he’s 18 because he’s still at college.

ThePlumVan · 07/02/2022 10:27

Getting my DC a paper round each - let the good times roll Hmm

Migrainesbythedozen · 07/02/2022 10:27

So your brother is a deadbeat father who shirks hid financial responsibilities to an innocent child and you want to help him shirk it even more? Neither you or your brother seem to have any morals.

Migrainesbythedozen · 07/02/2022 10:29

You should be deeply, deeply and utterly ashamed of your brother for being neglectful and a useless worthless deadbeat pos. Not trying to help him be more of a neglectful and a useless worthless deadbeat pos. Lets hope his son inherited more of his mother's genes than your worthless pos brother's.

AllOfUsAreDead · 07/02/2022 10:29

A good parent does not ask how soon they can stop providing for their child. They want to provide for their child.

This. Your brother is a shite parent and you're a crap aunt if you think this is OK.

autienotnaughty · 07/02/2022 10:30

I would say until they get a job like the main carer does. So that could be 18 or 21 if going uni.

Migrainesbythedozen · 07/02/2022 10:30

How about he BACKPAY his ex for all the times she paid for his son? Your brother owes more than paying until he's 21, your brother is IN ARREARS for 20 months worth.

curlymom · 07/02/2022 10:31

@CanofCant

Mumsnet needs a tiny violin emoji.

P.S. Your 'brother' is a dick.

😂
ChargingBuck · 07/02/2022 10:34

@Skilovingmama

If this was on AIBU, fine, let rip on your thoughts on our child maintenance system. It's not, it's on legal matters. Most of the stuff on here is legally incorrect and simply based on the posters' own judgements about the situation. Therefore it's totally unhelpful to the OP.

No, you don't have to pay an extra 20 months if you have been out of work for that period due to illness.
Yes, it does matter whether the college course is full time or part-time
No, it does not matter whether you think this man is the scum of the earth - the point is to give accurate advice to the OP.

If you are a mumsnet moderator, fine, let rip your thoughts on what PP are allowed to post.

As you are not, your much-vaunted legal opinion means fuck-all, as does your Head Girl scolding about not being allowed opinions on any board but AIBU.

yesitssea · 07/02/2022 10:35

He definitely does, it's a child (have to pay until 18) and potentially up to 20 of the child remains in full time education.

Honestly he should want to pay. Pay for his kids. It's sad that he's been injured but paying parents in general need to step up. There is so much dodging and trying to get out of paying.

Derbee · 07/02/2022 10:36

Of course he has to pay child maintenance for his son. He’s 17 and in full time education.

For further advice, your brother should also

  1. appreciate the fact that his son’s mother has shouldered the majority of the financial and emotional burden of having a child, whilst your brother dips in and out as he fancies
  2. appreciate the fact that his son’s mother has shouldered ALL of the financial burden of having a child whilst your brother hasn’t been paying for the last 2 years.
  3. recognise that it’s pretty despicable behaviour to be googling how to get out of paying for your child, looking for loopholes of part time jobs etc etc.
3peassuit · 07/02/2022 10:38

As it’s a part time course I believe your brother is legally obliged to pay. Morally, too right he should.

Derbee · 07/02/2022 10:38

And an aunt posting on online forums to see if he can get out of paying, means he’s probably not being held to account by his family about what his legal AND moral responsibilities towards his son are.

OnlyAFleshWound · 07/02/2022 10:51

@Derbee

And an aunt posting on online forums to see if he can get out of paying, means he’s probably not being held to account by his family about what his legal AND moral responsibilities towards his son are.
According to the OP's posting history, she has a partner who is about to return to work and has to take strong pain medication. So I wouldn't invest too much in the idea that this is her brother.
Iputthetrampintrampoline · 07/02/2022 10:58

This thread has got me raging, I had no idea there was a time / age limit on supporting your own children what ever age they are, Christ most of us are still at it literally forever gladly and willingly in whatever way possible,think weddings,cars,property then along come grandchildren and same again, That is a parent that is what families do, These fucking sperm doners make me sick.They try to absolve their self of every responsibility going and gladly leave it to someone else who thank god will love and support their child. Thank god for that young mans mother, I am sure he has been badly let down over his young life, Time limit on paying oh fuck off what about love care support be it time or financial which when you have children there never ever is nor should there ever be a time limit on.......disgraceful question. I am sure every penny thats been prized out of sperm doners grubby hands has never been parted with gladly, Makes me sick

Fromthebirdsnest · 07/02/2022 11:04

Of course he does and make a plan for paying back what he owes! How is this a question?

BungleandGeorge · 07/02/2022 11:05

If he’s 17 it will be an apprenticeship which counts as full time training and is low paid. Or it’s a full time course, they’re not in college everyday there can be a lot of independent study.
I’d be absolutely ashamed of any family member not paying for their own child

Couchbettato · 07/02/2022 11:06

Is your brother called Lee 🤨 sounds exactly like the tale my mum was telling me about how my half brothers dad was refusing to pay maintenance now my brother is 17, in education and working part time.

Anyway, even if it's not, I think dad's who don't pay for their kids needs, even past 18, are complete arseholes. It's not like you are suddenly a financially independent stable adult once you hit that magical number.

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