Does my brother still have to pay children maintainer for his 17 year old working son?

[Nikki037297]

My brother has a son who is 17 and is working part time and at college part time. His ex is demanding money as my brother is just going back to work after being on the sick after an accident at work and breaking a bone in his neck and not being able to work for around 20 months now. He’s googled it and can’t find much out and it seams a bit complicated and never mentions the child working and what would happen in those circumstances. Does anyone know ?

This cant be real? Thank god my eldests dad has some sense and has agreed to keep paying maintenance while our dc are still in education.
Why would he not want to support his son while hes working part time for some pub money with his mates and continuing education to hopefully allow him to get a better paid carer to be able to support himself in life?
I do wonder how much glue sniffing mumsnetters do sometimes

@Skilovingmama

Why go on the legal matters forum then? If she wanted your general opinions rather than actual advice, she's have posted in chat

If the OP is seeking actual legal advice, she's [sic] should have gone to an actual lawyer, rather than asking on an internet forum where literally anyone can write whatever bollocks they want.

@Bigassbeebuzzbuzz

This cant be real? Thank god my eldests dad has some sense and has agreed to keep paying maintenance while our dc are still in education. Why would he not want to support his son while hes working part time for some pub money with his mates and continuing education to hopefully allow him to get a better paid carer to be able to support himself in life? I do wonder how much glue sniffing mumsnetters do sometimes

That's because your children's father has some sort of humanity, decency and sense of responsibility. Whereas the OP's brother...

@SpikeySmooth

A colleague has 2 sons and is not with their mum. He's helped them financially all the way through university and is now contributing to the deposits on their respective flats.

A friend supports all his adult children with the odd emergency cost, be it a rent payment or just a monthly bus pass.

My DF has supported my DB and I with unexpected costs and we are now in our 40s. They are loans, so we'll pay him back, but still...

Conversely, my DPiL don't have a lot of money in their retirement and I've paid for a new oven for them, because the old one was broken. They are paying me back what they can a month.

It's just what family does, doesn't it? Help each other? Keep their kids safe, fed, warm and housed? Basic stuff? I don't know why anyone wouldn't.

I probably would have bought the over without asking for them to pay it back tbh.

@Skilovingmama

If this was on AIBU, fine, let rip on your thoughts on our child maintenance system. It's not, it's on legal matters. Most of the stuff on here is legally incorrect and simply based on the posters' own judgements about the situation. Therefore it's totally unhelpful to the OP.

No, you don't have to pay an extra 20 months if you have been out of work for that period due to illness.
Yes, it does matter whether the college course is full time or part-time
No, it does not matter whether you think this man is the scum of the earth - the point is to give accurate advice to the OP.

Perhaps the mother should post on legal asking whether she can stop housing, feeding and clothing her son too.

@ApricotPeony The sad thing is that legally she probably can. But thankfully, most people don't parent their children by asking what is the absolute bare minimum they can legally do for them.

@HandWash

'Demanding' it is she?

Why doesn't your brother want to pay for his son? Less time Googling ways to get out of providing and more time working, would be my advice.

To be fair if he has been off work for 20 months he might not have any money, he might have debt.

He hasn't not been working for the fun of it, he had a broken bone in his neck.

Obviously the child needs support but maybe giving him a chance to actually get back to work and get paid would be reasonable.

You would still support a child who has part time job and in education if they are living with you. So why it's ok not to support a child who is still in education just because parents split up? Mind boggles.

The OP came on here for legal advice. Instead she gets a lot of people treating this as AIBU, some making assumptions about how much the boy earns and some making incorrect assertions about the law.

The legal position is that it doesn't matter how much the boy earns - whether it is just pocket money as a number on here are insisting, or whether he is in fact earning a good wage. The fact that the father has been off work for 20 months after breaking a bone in his neck is also not relevant to whether maintenance is payable now.

What matters is the education the boy is receiving. It is classed as "approved education" if it is an average of more than 12 hours per week of supervised study or course-related work experience, is not paid for by his employer and is one of the following:

• A levels or similar
• T levels
• NVQ or other vocational qualifications up to level 3
• a traineeship (assuming the OP is in England)
• Scottish Highers

If it meets the above requirements, it is "approved education" and child maintenance is due. If it does not, no child maintenance is due. That is the correct legal position.

If no maintenance is due he can, of course, choose to pay maintenance to his son's mother but she cannot force him to do so. He can, if he prefers, pay money direct to his son. But he does not legally have to pay anything.

Of course, if maintenance is due it must be paid to the mother.

I probably would have bought the over without asking for them to pay it back tbh. I hope I could do that but everyone's finances are different and if I look back there are times I could have done that and times where it would have been really difficult. These things are hard to judge without all the information.

I'm sorry Op, I didn't realise it was legal matters section until prh47 pointed out. Just came up on active and commented without thinking.

@rainrainraincamedowndowndown

You would still support a child who has part time job and in education if they are living with you. So why it's ok not to support a child who is still in education just because parents split up? Mind boggles.

If you were off sick with a serious injury you couldn't give them much support even if they are living with you.

I'm all for NRP paying but you can't get blood from a stone.

He does need to pay until the child reaches 18. But if your brother has been off work unpaid or on reduced wages then he should have applied for a reduction.

@rainrainraincamedowndowndown

I'm sorry Op, I didn't realise it was legal matters section until prh47 pointed out. Just came up on active and commented without thinking.

I will confess I did the same. I was outraged by this women trying to get her brother out of supporting his son and didn’t look to see what board it was was.

So while I still think they are despicable, I apologise for not checking the board

My Dd is 18 works part time in a shop and is on a full time college course although only in 3 days a week. Her father pays maintenace through the official child maintenance team.
I see the maintenance is to pay living cost like rent, water, gas etc like he would be contributing to if they loved together.

The child still has to eat, he still needs a warm home and clothes, he’s not going to be buying his own food at 17 or contributing to household bills. Of course your brother needs to pay, if he had some morales he needs to be over paying the back log off too!

No idea what the legal position is, but morally I can’t think why he would even question it.

So he's not provided for 20 months whilst I'll, now he can provide, he wants to question it, and you're here asking for advice for him?

You're whole family is beyond unreasonable. His poor son and his poor ex. Disgusting man thinking he gets put of his responsibilities because his teenager has some part time work.

@Bigassbeebuzzbuzz

This cant be real? Thank god my eldests dad has some sense and has agreed to keep paying maintenance while our dc are still in education. Why would he not want to support his son while hes working part time for some pub money with his mates and continuing education to hopefully allow him to get a better paid carer to be able to support himself in life? I do wonder how much glue sniffing mumsnetters do sometimes

Unfortunately I think yours may be in the minority. I know mine (and I also know of several others) stopped paying the moment he could.

His first priority is himself and his new life. His kids come second.
I don't think that's uncommon, sadly.

Once you get past all the pearl-clutchers on here, the rules about child maintenance liability are here: www.gov.uk/child-benefit-16-19

Pearl-clutchers is a disgustingly sexist comment anyway, but used here by this poster, its even more misogynistic as its a deliberate attempt to shame women for being angry at a a Father trying to get out of supporting his own child, (an option not open to the mother).

Its ok for women to be angry at men who try to pass their responsibilities for their own children onto women. That's a normal healthy response.

[quote OnlyAFleshWound]@Skilovingmama

Why go on the legal matters forum then? If she wanted your general opinions rather than actual advice, she's have posted in chat

If the OP is seeking actual legal advice, she's [sic] should have gone to an actual lawyer, rather than asking on an internet forum where literally anyone can write whatever bollocks they want.[/quote]
Lol at the [sic]

Wow, so much aggressiveness. OP asked a question about legal responsibilities and about moral obligation. The answer is it depends on what education he is receiving. If it is a college that does gsce, a level or btec level 3 then he has to pay. If it is something different and not considered 'being in a full time education' then he doesn't have to pay from the legal perspective.
OP, your brother is a big boy, let him deal with that himself. Also might be good thing to gently encourage him to see that parking aside legal responsibility it is duty to financially support his child

I agree that the nasty agression on this thread towards men is quite evil. This is a man eho has been off work for over a year becsuse of an accident.

@Viviennemary

I agree that the nasty agression on this thread towards men is quite evil. This is a man eho has been off work for over a year becsuse of an accident.

Can I ask what your definition of 'evil' is that it includes being outraged at men who want to dodge out of supporting their own children?

And is your definition of 'parenting' this: 'doing what you are legally required to, or not doing what you are legally unable to, but never doing any more than this.'

@Viviennemary

I agree that the nasty agression on this thread towards men is quite evil. This is a man eho has been off work for over a year becsuse of an accident.

Oh give it a rest with the constant complaining about men not being constantly centred on a predominantly female site....Vivienne. The guy is trying to get out of any responsibility for his kid, if anyone's exploiting his accident for a self-serving agenda then it's him, and you.