Making children available for contact - what does this actually mean?

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When a CAO requires the resident parent to make the children available for contact what does this practically mean?

More specifically if you have a child who doesn't want to go at any point, say, and you have driven all dc to the NRP handover point but that dc refuses to go. Have you made them available by taking them there and trying? Or are you required to literally force them?

Obviously resident parent should do all they can to encourage, help, reassure, be positive about contact but if even with all of that the child is adamant about not wanting to go there must come a point where it's detrimental not to listen to their wishes?

@collaborate Please show me where I said PA does not exist? I'm also curious why you choose to disregard the point I make: that resistance can arise for many reasons.

You say you cannot comment on whether it is real, but then acknowledge that there are a number of reasons whereby a child may be alienated from a parent. Which is it? A previous poster has suggested that the notion that a parent with care can turn the children against the other parent is wrong and I am doing my clients a disservice to suggest otherwise.

I did not say that. I said there may be other reasons (unrelated to the RP) which cause the child to resist contact.

You seem to believe resistance can only be caused by PA. Are you unable to see that a child, who for example, does not have a positive experience of contact may reasonably not want to see the NRP? Consider the list below, all of which are reasonable justifications for a child not wanting to have contact. Which do you feel is a reasonable way to treat a child, or caused by the RP alienating or not promoting contact?

• child who is neglected & emotionally abused during contact by the NRP
• child who hears the NRP disparage the child's other parent during contact
• NRP who lies to the child, who then discovers the truth (not from the RP)
• child who is denied the right to complete their home work, bathe in private, see their friends, speak to their other parent during contact by the NRP
• child who is told they are bad, nasty, selfish by the NRP

@Pinkyxx

I did not say that. I said there may be other reasons (unrelated to the RP) which cause the child to resist contact.

You seem to believe resistance can only be caused by PA. Are you unable to see that a child, who for example, does not have a positive experience of contact may reasonably not want to see the NRP? Consider the list below, all of which are reasonable justifications for a child not wanting to have contact. Which do you feel is a reasonable way to treat a child, or caused by the RP alienating or not promoting contact?

• child who is neglected & emotionally abused during contact by the NRP
• child who hears the NRP disparage the child's other parent during contact
• NRP who lies to the child, who then discovers the truth (not from the RP)
• child who is denied the right to complete their home work, bathe in private, see their friends, speak to their other parent during contact by the NRP
• child who is told they are bad, nasty, selfish by the NRP

Children are hardwired to love both parents in all but extreme circumstances. In my relative's case, the child's mother disparaged the father, and refused to let the children complete their homework, or bathe regularly, or speak to their father freely, yet the children still loved her fiercely. It takes an awful lot to stop a child loving both parents.

Parental alienation definitely exists. To say it is a used by "abusers" to estrange children from their mothers does a disservice to 40% of victim parents who are women.

Children's social services in our area said ex's behaviours were because she wanted me out of childs life. So I said "parental alientation then?" and they said "we don't use that terms it's American".

I don't how many levels of cognitive dissonance someone needs to go through to believe corrective control of an adult is a thing but coercive control of a child aka parental alienation isn't.

Children are very perspective to adults and sloppy language and body language can be all a child needs to pick up a lead from a resident parent.

Our two year old didn't want to go back to mums after being here since Thursday and 5 nights this week but I always use encouraging language and am positive about the ex. If she ever decided not to go back I would be clear in my own conscience that she didnt get that from me.

As I have our daughter on a shared care basis and I was a douche I could begin to alienate her against her mum. Does anyone actually think a vindictive person given that opportunity wouldn't? What would stop an abusive man in my position doing that? Same applies in reverse.

Yup - I agree, PA is a thing.