Thinking of leaving DP- not married

[yawningbear]

I have 2 children, live with DP, have done for 11 years, not married, joint mortgage. I put more money in as a deposit but not much more. I would be happy to split the profit equally if we sold to keep things amicable.

However I doubt he would be amicable & I'm not sure he will even agree to sell. I know I have no rights to his pension or anything really. But presumably he would need to split any profit & then pay maintenance for the children? They would live with me with a small amount of time each week with him. I think he would agree with that.

I'm not really sure where to start. Keep reading threads where people say 'I've got all my ducks in a row' but I'm not really sure what I need to get sorted.

I just tried to use the child maintenance calculator to work out how much maintenance he may need to pay but need to know his income pre tax but minus pension. I don't know exact figures. And how would I go about ensuring he actually paid anything without taking him to court?

Hi. Firstly good luck. You sound like you have it all set out in your head. The only thing I can advise is seek legal advice. I know it boring, but it will solve any bumps down the road.

Good luck OP, I agree with seeking legal advice. What do you mean split any profit?

You may have a joint mortgage but what is on the deeds of the house?

Do you own your house as joint tenants or tenants in common? This is likely to affect the position regarding how much of the proceeds of sale you will be entitled to.

Re child maintenance, it's a fairly crap system with all the burden on the receiving party to provide evidence that the paying party is earning more than he (or she) declares for income tax purposes. However, assuming your ex-P is honest, the CMS can deduct the maintenance from his income and pay it to you if you use the "collect and pay" service. You have to pay the CMS a 4% fee for this, and your ex will also have to pay fees. CMS will only let you use Collect and Pay if there is good reason to believe exP will default.

Do you have a job? Where will you live once the house is sold?

Thanks for the replies, I am not sure what is on the deeds. I have totally assumed it must be us both. By split the profit I mean any funds left over once the house is sold & we pay off the remaining mortgage.

I also don't know Wanda re: tenants in common or the other option. That was never mentioned by our solicitor when we bought the house. I found something online the other day, a registry or some way of checking relatively easily so will do that.

I do have a job, that I love so that at least is a positive. As to where I will live I have no idea. I can't afford to stay in the current area really but the kids would be really upset to move schools. It would be so unsettling which is why I haven't done anything but equally we can't continue as things stand.

Thanks again, will get legal advice, a friend saw someone recently who she has recommended so will look into that.