ex-spouses and harrassment on MN

[flaminhoopsaloolah]

If an ex-spouse were to manage to find a mumsnet member on here (and ex spouse had not been told by mn member that they are a regular member here) and the ex spouse deliberately made a membership and posted a nasty reply in a thread the member started, would that be allowed to be partly used as evidence to try to gain a non-harrassment order of some sort? Also, would the ex-spouse be able to take the member's postings and use them in Childrens Act proceedings?

My own view is that people rush off to get these orders in all kinds of spurious cases and very unfairly to exclude a parent from their own home etc. Obviously if someone has been chucking bricks at you or beating the children and his wife fair enough but if someone is just a bit nasty sometimes I don't think the orders should be granted.

If a nasty reply on a mumsnet thread upsets someone I think they should get therapy and get a thicker skin not go off to the courts for a non molestation order. We didn't build our empire on people hurt by words on a page.

It depends on the context. Recently had a client's ex (deservedly) punished for breach of a non-mol for sending her what would have seemed to someone ignorant of their history a benign message in FB.

If you could prove that the ex is the other poster it might be of some evidential value, but still it depends in all the other stuff that's been going on.

Thank you, Collaborate.

Xenia - I agree with you. One simple message on a forum would be overkil l - however this is part of something much larger (which I alluded to in my original post) the phrase "partly used" was the clue there.

Yes, it's a question of where and when and how much. If someone posts very nasty things on line in all the places you write and does that about 200 times and it says I will kill you rather than just a comment disagree with your view on capital punishment or whatever then it moves into the realm of an ex standing outside your house shouting swear words at you 15 times a week.

However some of these people want attention from the person they are hounding and giving them that if you take them to court can sometimes be walking straight into their hands. Totally ignoring them sometimes is a better course but as people say you need many more facts to judge properly.

Collaborate, do you know if the ex-spose could use the member's posts in Childrens' Act proceedings?

Xenia - again I agree with you - playing into these people's hands only rewards them - in this case though the context is that of a domestic abuse case and the forum member has experienced several years of abuse in various guises....the finding the member on internet forums and calling her names in posts she has made is a new tactic.

I know someone in RL who is being encouraged by her solicitor to gather screenshots of social media sites as part of her child related court case.