Scottish family law.

[OldLadyKnowsNothing]

DS has a DS with his exP, and she is being difficult about contact. He has had to engage a solicitor. She claims to have done the same, but hasn't provided the name. The earliest possible date she could have engaged a lawyer was Monday last week, and she claims she had her copy of her solicitor's letter to DS "days ago." No letter has arrived here.

Am I right in thinking that this letter, if it exists, should have been sent to Ds' lawyer rather than/ as well as to DS?

If anything has been sent via a lawyer, it would be sent via Recorded Delivery, so a signature is required. I went through a difficult time with my exP (he kidnapped DS so I stopped contact, in the fear that he would never return), and he claimed to have a solicitor feeding him information and sending me letters. I asked mine, who told me explicitly that any information sent would be done so through them, and would need to be signed for. That way, nobody can ever claim to have never received anything.

Failing that, it would have been sent to your DS' lawyer, who would notify him of anything having arrived. If nothing is to be found anywhere, she's likely outright lying.

Thank you, hope you got your case sorted satisfactorily. Last time he saw his solicitor she looked surprised when DS mentioned his ex was claiming her lawyer had told her this, that and the next blatant bollox, and I was pretty sure she said any correspondence should be going through her.

He's seeing his sol. again on Monday, it's possible she's received this letter, but I very much doubt it's existence.

Just don't understand why she's being so difficult about seeing a sodding lawyer! She's not working so she'd get Legal Aid.

It isn't unusual for solicitors to send copies of letters to their client. It's even possible her solicitor has sent her a daft for approval before sending the letter to your son.

... or his solicitor.

Hadn't thought of the draft thing. I'm a bit suspicious about the timing though, when she told him to get a lawyer or he'd never see his son again, he couldn't get an appointment for about 10 days. I'm surprised that not only has she sought, but found, seen and instructed, and seen a draft copy of the proposed letter, and all within a week.

I am also astonished that, going by what she claims the letter says, her lawyer has apparently taken a very aggressive stance and isn't mentioning mediation, which he's asked for several times. :(

Suppose we'll find out the truth on Monday. Thanks for your reply.

I would like to think any dad that wants contact should be given ever opportunity; it's so often the case that a lot of fathers don't seem to be bothered.
I would question the existence of the letter too, it's like my solicitor told me; they get blamed and 'used' for a lot of things and excuses, because they're the scapegoat when people want to act threateningly in a passive-aggressive way :P

On a side-note, it's really endearing to hear about your DS fighting for this, and asking for mediation. What an admirable father! :)

Thank you so much, ModdedMummy, I realise that we're sort-of looking at this from opposing sides, but my DS is a brilliant dad and until very recently had access/custody/whatever you call it three nights a week, which, given daytime hours, often meant pretty much 50/50. He was/is also paying way over CSA amounts of child maintenance. There really is no reason for his ex to have changed this arrangement and we are at a loss. (Ds is only 21, and living back "at home" since he and his ex broke up, hence my perhaps over-involvement.)