Antagonising siblings!

[Tillytoes1]

Hi,
I have three children, the nearly 8 and 4 year old have started antagonising each other a lot recently. It normally starts about 30 minutes before school drop off in the morning. My 8 year old always starts it by saying “You’re not a big girl, you’re a little girl” my daughter doesn’t like it when he says that and she always reacts and then they spend all of their time antagonising each other, it does sometimes stop after a few minutes but can continue for a good 20 minutes. I do tell them to both stop but they still carry on regardless. Is this a case of ignoring the behaviour? Or should I put sanctions in place for them both? I’m feeling a bit lost about what to do! Thanks for reading!

They’re not antagonising each other. Your son is picking on your daughter and you need to put a stop to that. There’s a huge difference in understanding between a four year old and and eight year old. You start the morning by warning your son bit to tease his sister and that there will be consequences if he does, then you follow through.

*not to tease his sister.

Agree with @S1naidSucks your 8 year old sounds like he's antagonising your DD and she is reacting. At 8 years old he is much more able to understand his behaviour than she is her reactions.

Yes I did think this but sometimes my daughter says “I’m not a little girl, you’re a little boy back”. I’m not sure what consequences to put in place, as he’s not huge on iPads/gaming etc but I did think that sending him to bed earlier would work. They play really well together most of the time and my son is most of the time really kind to her, shares sweets etc but there is always this problem recently with antagonising behaviour, which always happens before the school run.

Yes I did think this but sometimes my daughter says “I’m not a little girl, you’re a little boy back”.

What do you expect a four year old to say? Seriously OP, your daughter is in NO WAY to blame for this. Why can’t you see it’s entirely caused by your son goading her. Poor wee soul.

I would talk to son about his behaviour, I would also perhaps try and find something for them to do together or separately before school that will keep them busy, I often find mine get bored in the little bit before getting ready and leaving for school while I am running round trying to get things ready however if they have a game set out or a bit of tv time they behave much better.