Due with number 5 and freaking out over birth - help!

[devoncreamtea]

Just this...having a mad wobble, have had great births (last just 1 hour!) but suddenly terrified that my luck has run out and am overwhelmed with fear. Any advice welcome!

I have quick, fast births and don't know I'm in labor until I'm close to pushing. And though I'm not afraid of giving birth (this will be #7 afterall) but I'm terrified of giving birth some place random and all my DC have been early (one on DD) and last was premature so... yeah. Very nervous!

I know people say not to worry but it's so not that easy to do.

Could you write a birth plan just to ease your mind? It may not go according to plan but it might help you prepare and give you some form of control and help ease the fear by writing down your options and that there is pain relief avaliable if you need it.

I'm not great ar advice but couldn't just read and run. Hope someone comes along with better advice for you xx

Thanks multiple - congrats on your pregnancy!

I am just not feeling confident this time, I have had hb's before, but due to a diagnosis of GD (which appears to be v. mild - (diet controlled, no high readings, baby normal size) I am under consultant and she wants me in hospital and preferably induced. It is a bit scary! I am hoping not to be induced but am worried about the whole hospital thing....particularly about actually making it to the hospital! The consultant has said, if it seems fast stay at home and come in after (in ambulance!!) - it is just so much the unknown this time and I don't feel in control of it at all.

Anyway, thanks for reply!

I've had two homebirths. One was BBA and DH had to deliver our breech baby. I was petrified. And that's because I didn't know it was in labour either.

I'm also more nervous about hospital births, and even though I've had previous ones at the hospital, not out of choice, more because I had to, I hated it. I'm petrified of any type of surgery so felt very unsure of how I would cope with CS, thankfully managed to avoid it both times, but I fretted something fierce.

I have you got any homebirth supplies just in case you do end up birthing at home? You can decided when you want to call the ambulance, either after you've had the baby or as soon as you start labouring, so maybe you'd get to the hospital in time. You could even take baby CPR lessons just so you're covering all bases.

I hate not being in control either, I had the perfect homebirth planned for this baby, my brother (he's a mw) was to be here and be my birthing partner along with DH but I've been transferred to consultant care as baby has BPs, CCAM and IUGR :( so now this pregnancy is uncertain, and I feel confused and out of control.

Anyway, good luck with the rest of your pregnancy and I hope whatever happens, you have a wonderful birth experience :) xx

Thank you so much. I'm sorry to hear your pregnancy isn't going as planned either.

Wishing you a trouble free experience x

I've given birth 6 times. With my last baby, I was terrified. I'd lost confidence in.myself. Births 4 & 5 were water births. Never had any complications. Never had more than G&A forpain relief.

I let tho Drs get to me. Weeks of extra scans/ monitoring etc due to my age & being in a medical environment really got to me.

with hindsight, I would had made sure I was more relaxed, hypnosis etc. Better birth partner & stuck to my guns about the location of the birth.

Good luck!

Devon I just found out I'm having number6. I've had forceps hospital all the way through to blissful home birth with doula and home birth without assistance until 10 mins before the end. I am worried about being railroaded into decisions. I was appalled at the care I received 3 years ago for dc5. I'm hoping to employ an independent midwife. I do not want to be bullied. Also a bit scared.

Mrs congratulations!

You've had the full range then?! It is very unnerving being 'advised' from all angles isn't it? I've had so many opinions from various mw's and consultants - so difficult to feel confident in making a choice.

A friend of mine hired an Independent mw and felt it was a great decision. She had a tricky birth, but the mw dealt really well with it and my friend felt it was a very positive experience. For her, the consistency of seeing the same person all the time and it being her that delivered baby, was very important.

I hope you get the care you need.

Good luck!

Hello all, I'm just popping back on to update you (bit late!) with the news that I had a little boy in October. He is Laurie and is such a lovely baby!

Thank you so much for your support back in October - I was really freaking out. In the end I was induced in hospital, which initially didn't work. Broke water and Laurie was born 8 minutes later!!! So Whew, fast and furious!

Hope everyone else is doing well x