Pg with no3 - big gap, should I think about a no4?

[girlfromdownsouth]

I am nearly 10wks pg with No.3, there is a big gap between this one and my other two. DD is 8 and DS will be 7 when this one is born. There are only 19 months betw. DD and DS and they are inseparable and best friends. It has been such a joy watching them grow up and play together. My worry is that No.3 will grow up like an only child with nothing in common with his/her much older siblings.

Should I think about having a 4th quite soon after No.3? Am certainly not opposed to having 4 children, but must mention that I will be 40 when No.3 is born and hubby will be 44 so time is kinda running out and am feeling very sick with this one...

Sounds a great idea, age shouldn't be a problem if you managed ttc this time.

In some areas GP's see more Mum's to be in their 40's than 20's!

ps , could it be twins, then you wouldn't have to worry

Hi there,

congratulations! Our No 3 was born when
No 1 was 8 1/2 and No 2 was 6 1/2. Felt exactly the same as you so had No 4 2 years later. It really felt 'balanced' when no 4 arrived! I felt 'complete' if that makes sense??!! As you say, our first 2 (although they have their moments!) generally get on very well and have heaps of fun together. Worried that No 3 would be lonely once others were older. I was 38 and hubby 44. Go for it!

Liz

Your eldest 3 have similar age gaps to my eldest 3. I went on to have DC#4 21 months after DC#3 and it worked out wonderfully. They're so close and I can't imagine not having the pair of them. Twins would be good though

My parents had me and DSis1 within 18 months then a 6 1/2 year gap to Dsis2. My Mum thinks it was fabulous and really enjoyed having a baby after such a long gap. She feels that DSis2 had lots of advantages of being a third plus having older parents. My parents were in a very different stage when she was growing up, more time and more affluent - so she did have some amazing opportunities that me and DSis1 never had. Plus she had older siblings who let her get away with and do stuff that we could never do.

But I think my perspective is very different. I feel that she did do much of her growing up as an only child with lots of parents rather than having siblings. I know she was lonely a lot of the time once we had left home.

So if I were you, I would try for DC4 if you can. I wouldn't think your age would really be a problem. Plus you will have 2 older helpers - hopefully!

Just for the record my parents did try for number 4 but it didn't happen.