Ivf September 2025

[Klmno]

Thought I would start a thread as can't see one already
Anyone in the same boat who'd like to chat?
It's our first round. Likely to need a freeze all which I'm quite disappointed about as means won't even transfer until Nov.
I'm on short protocol.
Feeling pretty fed up ATM tbh, partly because it's come to this but also just want to get going, currently just waiting for my period early sept and feels like my life is on hold until then!

Hey @pastelheart thanks for checking in on us! How many weeks are you now? How exciting that the news is out in the open...albeit a bit overwhelming! Remind me, are you finding out the gender?

I am feeling a little negative ATM. Well, on the face of things I'm quite happy as I'm away with friends, but I have a gut feeling it's failed again. No cramps, no spotting, no symptoms, nothing. I know I'm only the equivalent of 11dpo so wouldn't expect to feel much but that's the small rational part of me speaking, the overwhelming feeling is that it's not worked.
Maybe I've got the mindset that it's not worked to protect myself as hope is a killer.
I just can't bare to think about how gutted I'll be if I'm right. I'm testing Sunday night and I'm dreading it!!
I don't dare imagine the joy I would feel if it's positive. It just seems too good to be true!

@Klmno i was sure mine hadn't worked and i got a bfp, not having symptoms doesn't mean anything so don't stress yourself out! i don't think anyone actually thinks it's worked (except the every day testers hovering over the faintest lines daily)

That makes me feel a little better @zirafica thanks. Did you get any cramps or anything? I've read so much about cramps being a good thing. TBF though I hardly ever get period cramps so maybe I just wouldn't get any 🤷🏻‍♀️
Just so scared there's something wrong that would prevent implantation, I think I've mentioned I have a fibroid that I've had so many different opinions on I don't trust my own body now.

Aww I totally feel this @Klmno and I have felt exactly the same worrying about lack of symptoms etc. it’s really hard not to spiral but I honestly think if you look for any narrative (cramps, no cramps, symptoms, no symptoms etc) you’ll find a whole host of people who’ve got both positive and negative results. I have to say, I was surprised by the amount of people who say they had NO symptoms and they were super shocked when they saw the positive test. I think if we rationalise it though, how much would we realistically be expecting to feel if we were 10/11/12 dpo? I think because we know an embryo is in there we’re expecting more side effects. Also agree with you that everything is subjective. So one persons “really painful cramps” could be something another would barely notice or feel. It’s so hard not to google every day and see what others feel etc but I found it was sending me into a spiral so I’ve tried to refrain the past couple of days which has helped.

I think it’s natural for us to think it hasn’t worked, and tbh I cannot comprehend seeing a positive test but I guess everybody sees a positive for a first time at some point!? I’m also dreading testing as I know it could potentially burst my bubble, but I am allowing myself to feel some hope that this might just have worked for the next few days ❤️ I kind of decided I’ll feel rubbish either way if it’s negative, so enjoying a few days of hope beforehand could be a nice bubble! I’m glad you’re enjoying your week away with your friends and hope you’re feeling less anxious over the next couple of days. Not long to go! X

Ahh @AnonTTC yes for sure, everything you've said is so so true! And so many months when we were TTC naturally I was like oh my boobs hurt, or oooo I felt a bit sick just then, maybe this is the month...and it wasn't.

I think it is so hard because I feel pretty alone in all this, I don't really have anyone to talk to in real life who understands (or even if they're understanding, they don't have personal experience of it) so thank goodness for this forum. It's so nice to talk to other people who are also finding the wait a killer and to know that other people also really can't imagine a positive test ever happening! You're right though that so many people have been in our shoes and also couldn't comprehend it but it has happened eventually.

@AnonTTC is so right @Klmno. symptoms or no symptoms or some symptoms or all the symptoms means absolutely nothing and it can go either way. My close friend had zero symptoms, was so sure it had failed as she’s read online everyone had pinching or twisting or cramping feelings, went to her beta and now is a proud mum of a 5 year old boy from that “failed” transfer. I had some bad cramping and thought it was a sure sign it hadn’t worked, but then I thought about it and was sure it was actually my bowel as I was struggling with constipation from the progesterone. Honestly your mind and body will play so many tricks on you at this time and nothing is a given until you wee on that test. So please don’t try to overanalyse things ♥️ honestly looking back after the positive I was like AAAH SO THAT COULD’VE BEEN THAT but in the moment I was absolutely sure it was pointing to the opposite. My biggest piece of proof was that “I just didn’t feel pregnant” HOW COULD I AFTER 5 DAYS 😂😂😂 I still don’t and it’s been 2 weeks since the transfer!
honestly try to not hunt for symptoms, our brains are scattered as is. What I will say is if it’s really getting to you, do consider testing early. I made it to day 7 and tested in the morning and had a faint line that I first thought was negative and then when I went to throw it away 20 mins later, I saw a more clear line but then convinced myself it was an evaporation line and that it was definitely negative😂 didn’t test for two more days and then tested with my boyfriends nd my jaw dropped when he said it was a +. It’s so tough whichever way you look at it so just be kind to yourself and do whatever helps you get through it ♥️

Did the cramps feel like period cramps @zirafica ? I've definitely had a bit of an irritated bowel haha causing some cramps but had it last time which was a failed transfer, fairly sure it's just the progesterone for me. Definitely not had any period-like cramps. Like you say it is just completely impossible to know until the test. Last month (which failed) I had some spotting and thought that was a good sign but it obviously wasn't. I also got the strange bladder sensations that I get just before my period, which I haven't had this time...maybe that's a good sign.....but it really will be impossible to know until the test.

I'm away without my partner until Sunday so won't be testing early as wouldn't want to be away from him for either result. As @AnonTTC describes it as a bubble, I'd rather stay in that either way. Even if I was home I think I've learnt that testing early just heightens my anxiety about 'oh is it too early to show up'...but that only works if there's no tests in the house 🤣

@Klmno completely understand. I tested two days early cause I had to travel away from my partner for a family emergency, otherwise definitely would’ve waited for the OTD (despite doing the day 7 test). Honestly at that point I just wanted to know what was what but even that I completely misunderstood so in hindsight I’d wait for my OTD too. They were just very sharp stabbing cramps, that’s why I thought it was my bowel, more like somebody was scraping the inside of my stomach. But again please don’t read into this cause I did end up TMI SORRY having a bowel movement that day when we got home after 3 days so it TOTALLY could’ve been that. You just can’t know. Chin up. Sunday will be here soon and it’s good you’ve got something to keep your mind off of things ♥️

Haha there's no such thing as tmi when it comes to IVF really is there haha. I had sharp pains in either side but I knew it was just wind, I also badly timed some rather bean/lentil heavy meals the first few days hahaha I was so gassy. Oh it's all so glam! 🤣 But the fact you didn't have overwhelming symptoms and 'just didn't feel pregnant' does give me a bit of hope so thanks.

Haha yes this is also SUCH a good point.. usually I am convinced I'm pregnant and manage to find every possible sign so maybe nothing is actually a good sign? I don't know about you but I feel more cautious throughout this process and anything I do feel I'm like 'well must be the progesterone' anyway so it's really pointless (but impossible to not do!!)

& yes, I often try to remind myself that even my friends who got pregnant naturally had months where they saw negative tests and the only time they've seen a positive is when they actually conceived so I think no matter what process you're in you could say 'I've never seen a positive' kind of thing.

I'm the same as you where there aren't any days pre-Sunday that would be appropriate and we're seeing family on Saturday which I know I'd not feel up to if we'd had a negative test, so I'd rather wait until we have a day dedicated just to us. You've just reminded me actually.. I need to order some tests!! 🤣 I think I will start to feel more and more anxious the closer we get because currently I'm in a nice 'could be pregnant' frame of mind. Funny because we're out with friends this evening and before the transfer I was really pleased knowing it was enough time before this night out so that I could test and likely know the result/whether I would still be not drinking but now it's come around I honestly couldn't give a hoot and would rather not drink the whole night!! Hoping it's all for a good cause ❤️

Gosh Sunday is gonna be a big day for you both! Keeping everything crossed <3

If it's any consolation, the worries don't end with a positive - they actually kind of end with a negative as you have time to regroup and reasses.

I feel like the positive has just opened up a possibility of an even bigger pain if things fall through - you've got the hcg tests that can show problems, then the viability tests that can show empty sacks, then I see people not hearing heartbeats at 8/10 weeks, miscarrying at 12... it's just an endless string of things that can go wrong at any point.

Obviously wishing a positive for you both with all my heart but I ache thinking how a positive doesn't mean we're anywhere out of the woods yet!

Aww I totally see what you mean @zirafica and have often thought I bet the relief is momentary before the “new” worries kick in.

However, I do have to disagree worries ending if it’s negative and I think that’s easier to say from a place of an existing positive test. If my test is negative then yes, granted I will accept it and know we can try again, but there will also be worries and doubts in my mind as to whether the next one would “stick” or the next one after that.. and naturally our minds would wander to worrying whether there was a reason it didn’t stick that we’re not aware of.

Completely appreciate brand new worries will arise along with a positive test, but I think I’d take them over worries of whether we will ever see a positive test or not, at least we’d have moved on to the next stage. Fingers crossed I’ll be able to report back on that though soon!!

Yes @AnonTTC I would definitely say pick a day with no pressure and plans. When my last one failed I was so glad I could hibernate for a couple of days. If it's good you'll just want to celebrate or talk about it with your partner loads I imagine.

Can totally see how the list of worries changes and develops @zirafica with a positive. However my last negative definitely didn't end any worries and definitely exacerbated my current worries about my fibroid or some other implantation issue we don't know about. I would feel an immense relief if we could just get over the first hurdle and see a positive test for the first time. Even there were further hurdles down the line.

Oh I absolutely agree with you both on the bad sides of the negative. Of course the concerns are awful there. But things can go wrong at any point with a positive so it feels like the worries will never end… like you said @Klmno you feel like you’ve passed a massive hurdle and then more pop up on the horizon.

Yeah I feel like if it was to work at least I'd be in a chance of things working out. As it is, can't even seem to get off the starting block.
But who knows, maybe after all this 'not feeling pregnant' I'll have a nice shock on Sunday!

Apologies to you both, I really didn’t think how inconsiderate that might’ve come across and that wasn’t my intention at all.
A negative is definitely the worst case scenario. I’ve just been deep into reading about all the things that can go wrong after a positive but you’re right, you need that to happen before anything else (good or bad does).
thoughts with you both and I hope we’ll be worrying about blood tests and scans together soon ♥️
@Klmno can confirm still very much don’t feel pregnant!

Hello @Klmno and @AnonTTC sorry for delay, I don’t really know what happened… feel like i had a busy few days but I couldn’t tell you what i have done lol! I am 16 weeks today, it’s flying! And yes @Klmnowe have found out the gender… we are having a baby boy!

eeeeeek getting close for you both, I know you are probably feeling nervous/worried, so I don’t want to concentrate on that but I do want to say I am thinking positive happy successful thoughts for you both <3 I have everything crossed you.

Also,

I had minimal symptoms…

do you have anything nice planned before you are planning on testing? Xx

Don't worry @zirafica I knew what you meant...just feel strongly that with one failed transfer already I definitely wouldn't feel any relief at another.
I'm actually a midwife so I know in detail all the many many many things that can go wrong throughout, but also know how many pregnancies (which is by far the vast majority!!!) go smoothly, if that makes you feel any better?
I will definitely be a wreck even after the positive test if I eventually get one! But in a different way.
@pastelheart oh my goodness 16 weeks already!!! Amazing. And a gorgeous boy, how lovely.

Thank you @Klmno for understanding and for what it’s worth I completely regret saying it. Appreciate the insider knowledge, here’s hoping it all goes well. So so so so hopeful for both of you ♥️

@Klmno i just wanted to say I’m thinking of you and keeping everything crossed that this transfer is successful. I personally didn’t have any symptoms at all in the TWW. I had cramping the day of transfer (likely due to things being irritated by the catheter, I think) and then nothing at all. I’m 15 weeks now and have still had minimal symptoms - some very very slight nausea from weeks 5-7 (never to the point of retching or ever being sick) and then nothing since. I was the same with my son. So symptoms (or complete lack thereof) aren’t a reliable indicator. A friend of mine was being sick 10+ times a day and she had a blighted ovum x

@babycoconut thank you so much. The more 'no symptoms" stories I hear the better I feel as I've really felt none. I was told to expect cramps after my egg collection as got 26 eggs but I didn't get any....maybe I'm just not a crampy person?! 🤣 So glad you've made it safely to 15 weeks ❤️

Aww don’t worry @zirafica i knew what you meant too, but I just cannot imagine feeling anything other than disappointment and dread if we get a negative test! I do appreciate and agree with what you were saying though in the sense that it’s not just as if our worries all just disappear, new stresses and anxieties appear that we weren’t aware of before because we’re so focused on getting that positive test we don’t really think beyond it. Plus it totally makes sense if you’ve been reading stories and feeling anxious about pregnancy. Sorry you’ve been feeling like that too.. I know easier said than done but maybe try and avoid reading too much negative stuff as I can imagine it can mess with your head (and sounds like you have enough going on in your personal life). Will be nice when you can go for your scan and hopefully feel more reassured ❤️

Arghhh the closer the test date gets the more nervous I am getting. It’s such a mind game that it could honestly go either way and the only way to tell is a test!! I convince myself of both eventualities then have to remind myself I literally have no idea whether it’s worked or not so it’s pointless what I think at this stage 🤣

Congratulations on finding out you’re having a little boy, how lovely! 💙 wow - 16 weeks already. It’s so crazy I feel like this forum started only a couple of weeks ago, it’s all gone so quickly since we all had our retrievals in September.

Thanks so much for your lovely words. Definitely feeling nervous the closer testing gets but also reaching a point where I kind of just want to know now. Keeping everything crossed 🤞🏼

@Klmno honestly, I know exactly what you mean. I was frantically googling “no symptoms success stories” and every post I read, they still had more symptoms than me! I literally had nothing and I’m convinced the slight nausea was anxiety thing over anything else/I was imagining it as it was sooo mild. I had my hcg blood tests and I remember it being higher than “average” for however many days past transfer I was… so, in theory, I should’ve had more symptoms if it’s caused by hcg. I also hadn’t had a positive test before my son. Had a chemical with my last FET in between. And this one, so far, has been successful. So really, every new embryo is a new chance ❤️

@AnonTTC when is test date for you? I have everything crossed for you too 🤞🏼❤️