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Infertility

Our Infertility Support forum is a space to connect with others in the same position, discuss causes, treatment and IVF, and share infertility stories of hope and success.

BFP after IVF - the journey continues (part 2)

976 replies

HopefulllHolly · 11/07/2024 15:46

SENSITIVE CONTENT

Continuation of previous thread for anyone with a BFP following IVF to support with anxieties and other worries that come along with pregnancy after infertility.

@AnnieStar12
@DippyDuck19
@DogMummy87
@Edf
@Fluffyted
@Leaf86
@LouP87
@Natty2
@SETTC87
@ThePeachGoose
@jas1996
@lemonyfox
@oliviagrace2307
@summerchild92

Please tag anyone else I’ve missed accidentally!

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35
Edf · 07/08/2024 20:04

soo I just wanted to let you all know we are having another little girl 🩷🩷 scan
all looked good and healthy so I’m over the moon! I was convinced it was a boy so can’t quite get my head round it! Saved myself a fortune in clothing 😂

HopefulllHolly · 07/08/2024 20:20

@Edf Awwww a little lady incoming! Congratulations! 🥳

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DippyDuck19 · 07/08/2024 20:24

@Edf congrats on your little girl 🩷🩷🩷

Natty2 · 08/08/2024 07:05

@Edf thank you! And so exciting to hear about your baby girl! 💕

Thank you @AnnieStar12 @HopefulllHolly @DippyDuck19 @oliviagrace2307
felt very surreal for the rest of yesterday and feels good to get to this milestone 🥰

@DippyDuck19 sorry to hear you were having an anxious day, I hope the rest of the day improved for you?

@Fluffyted thank you! felt like things eased a little bit yesterday but definitely worth the suffering 😅

I missed the pregnancy pillow chat the other day. I'm pleased to hear I'm not the only one suffering with hip pain! I've been trying to side sleep since transfer tbh as I read it helped with implantation but my hips are suffering.

Which pregnancy pillow would you all recommend?

oliviagrace2307 · 08/08/2024 08:26

Congrats @Edf on the news of your little girl!! How exciting I bet your DD will love having a little sister 😍

DippyDuck19 · 08/08/2024 13:17

@Natty2 I have the bbhugme pillow. They're very expensive brand new but you can pick them up second hand. After doing a bit of research on MN this pillow is recommended loads along with the Bella moon pillow. I like the fact the bbhugme is mouldable. Think @HopefulllHolly has the same one too?

HopefulllHolly · 08/08/2024 13:47

Yeah I have the bbhug me pregnancy pillow (and bought another one but can’t remember the name of it - which is apparently good to stop you sleeping on your back, it’s not arrived yet though) 🙂 I shall report back! I’ve also got the bbhugme nursing pillow from vinted which was kind of a mistake purchase as I thought it was the maternity one which is longer. But I’m keeping it as it will be good for breastfeeding anyway!

@DippyDuck19 How are you feeling today? I took my Apple Watch off at 10 weeks because my heart rate was bonkers and it was stressing me out. Plus it gave me contact dermatitis. My heart goes like the clappers even when resting now though, but I think that’s normal so I’m just ignoring it! Hope you’re feeling better today x

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DippyDuck19 · 08/08/2024 14:02

@HopefulllHolly I'm better today but just want to feel some flutters so I know he's ok and wiggling around in there.

I stopped wearing my Apple Watch during my TWW because my temperature dropped and I was convinced i was having an early miscarriage. I don't know why I've put it back on because my HR is all over the place. Not going to wear it now until after he's here because it will just make me anxious.

Am still tempted to book another scan next week for some reassurance as my 20 week scan on the 29th seems ages away. I have a consultant appointment next Thursday. Don't know what that appointment will involve and whether they check foetal heartbeat like a midwife.

jas1996 · 08/08/2024 22:07

Sorry I’ve been MIA guys, currently in mykonos having a lovely time! 🙈
Thank you to the lady who posted the book re negative anti bodies, and your message - really appreciated it 😀 (sorry i’ve read through so many other pages i can’t remember your @!)

Did anyone else not have a slight bit of bump by 11 weeks? Really thought I’d have something by now! I want to buy a BBHug Me but want enough use out of it to justify it and with me looking entirely normal i am still sleeping on my front🤣 I also just want a little bump ofc …

Final q - Did all of you find the NIPT 100% necessary? Been stressing myself out a bit about it, I’d love to do it but the price tag is a bit steep! 🙈 I’m only 28, healthy family history - Am I crazy for just using the NHS screening? I know it’s just a chance rather than actual results which worries me slightly … What’s your opinions on it all?

HopefulllHolly · 09/08/2024 06:52

@jas1996 Hope you’re having a lovely time in Mykonos - was so windy when I was there last summer!
I wouldn’t say you need it at 28 - the NHS tests are fine. There’s more chance of abnormalities when you’re older. I had it because my friend had a v stressful experience with the NHS ones and given I’ve been so anxious it just made sense to cut out that stress and get NIPT so there was no doubt. But most people still just get NHS tests. If it comes back abnormal you can always do nipt after (and some hospitals offer it at that point anyway!)

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HopefulllHolly · 09/08/2024 06:55

@jas1996 Oh and I can’t remember when I got a bump - I think I had a very tiny one at 12 weeks because my mum noticed but every body is different. Some women never get a bump. Mine is massive now at 16 weeks - and looks less like I’m fat and more round/compact. I’m sure it’ll pop out soon - I think most people start to show by 16 weeks so you have a while yet, esp if first baby! Don’t worry it’ll come!

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LouP87 · 09/08/2024 07:07

@jas1996 have a lovely time in Mykonos!

I didn’t bother with NIPT, In all honesty I didn’t know it existed until everyone was talking about it on here, I would have gone for it if my results came back high risk and my trust didn’t offer it, but didn’t need to in the end.

I have the smallest hint of a bump now and I’m 18 weeks tomorrow, I’m really tall so I think my torso is too long to show much at the moment.

I bought a pregnancy pillow a few weeks ago but got greedy and bought a long U shaped one. It’s far too big for our bed so I can’t use it for sleeping! I’m making do with our extra pillows under my leg to prop me up instead

AnnieStar12 · 09/08/2024 07:13

On pregnancy pillows - I think mine is just an Amazon cheapie and it does the job. I’ve got it out the loft now for another run!

@jas1996 on NIPT, most women don’t get it done if the NHS screening is all clear.
I guess it’s more common to hear about now as people are having babies much older than you, and the risk of disabilities is directly related to age. At 28 your base-line risk would be so low that unless something shows up at the 12 week screening you risk factor would probably be one in thousands.

And on bumps, it’s soo different in every pregnancy. People ‘pop’ at different times, and grow at different rates. I remember in my second pregnancy me and my best mate were due at the same time and I was massive and she barely showed. I know it’s easier said than done, but try not to compare to others as it’ll stress you out! I need to take that advice myself as I’m worried in the other direction, I think I’m waayyy too big for 14 weeks and compare to my own previous pregnancies when I wasn’t this big until much later. Mainly worry that it means I’m gonna have ALOT of work to do to get back in to shape afterwards.

Natty2 · 09/08/2024 07:49

Thanks for the pillow tips all 🧡

DippyDuck19 · 09/08/2024 08:52

@jas1996 hope you're having a lovely time in Mykonos.
I didn't have NIPT and just went with the standard NHS screening. I was tempted (as have various chromosome abnormalities/syndromes in the family) but couldn't justify the cost. I discussed my concerns about my family history with my midwife who referred me to a genetic specialist at Guys. They talked me through how each of the conditions are inherited etc and I decided against further testing.

As for bump, I had the tiniest at 13 weeks but really popped at 15!

jas1996 · 09/08/2024 08:54

Thanks all for the NIPT, Bump and Pillow words! hehe 🫶🫶

DippyDuck19 · 11/08/2024 13:01

Hope everyone is doing ok? Anyone have any scans coming up this week??

Am now home from Cornwall and glad to be back home in my own bed! Feeling less anxious now I'm home but debating on having another private scan. My 20wk nhs one is only 18 days away which doesn't seem that long to wait! Have had a few more flutters so taking that as reassurance for now he's happy wiggling around in there! Can't wait til they are stronger and more regular as it's very sporadic at the mo.

ThePeachGoose · 11/08/2024 13:16

Hi ladies,

It's been a while since I've been on here. My mum is visiting so I've been busy entertaining her, watching the Olympics, doing short trips around London in keep with my energy levels. Generally it's been okay and relaxed and my mum's been cooking for me, which she is over the moon about because she can help in some way, and I'm over the moon because I don't have to cook for some of my 5 meals a day lol

But I was clearly getting too comfortable and relaxed in this pregnancy that yesterday I was surprised with a gush of red blood, which I haven't had since week 6 and I'm now at week 11. Always a bit unnerving. It hasn't been a lot, nothing close to filling up a pad an hour and it stopped towards the evening and changed to brown bleeding. I only had another red drop today on wiping, but no cramps and otherwise I'm fine. It might have been from walking too much the day before as we went to Kew Gardens, but I clocked way fewer steps than I would normally and spent a lot of time sitting down. Anyway, I called my local EPU, as they know my history with the haematoma, but they weren't very concerned and didn't consider it an emergency. They were nice enough to book a reassurance scan for Monday though.

So I can relate to your bleeding stress @LouP87 It's always a bit unnerving seeing red, and I would have done the same in your shoes with booking a private scan. Everything else is pointless. Pleased to hear that all is okay and congratulations on having a boy!!!

For me, I'm clearly competing here for most scanned pregnancy ever! I have this EPU reassurance scan on Monday. Then I already had my own reassurance scan planned for Thursday along the NIPT. And then my 12 week scan will be the Thursday after that. This haematoma has caused me so many headaches, my gosh. The bleeds are never fun, now I can't fly, and I've also not been allowed to work out until week 12 at least. And during this time I feel that my muscles have been weakening and definitely been getting injured much faster, mostly my upper back and neck which I've always had issues with. Luckily I have a good physio that can quickly put me back together when needed.

I have a question for the group - are you comfortable flying in pregnancy? I have two trips booked to the US, both in business class so will be able to lie down with feet up, though one I'll probably need to cancel due to the haematoma. But the other one I'm hoping to change into a babymoon due to the timing and the location, and the hope that my haematoma will be healed by then as it's a while away. Either way, if no complications, NHS and the Royal College of Obstetricians say that it's completely fine to fly in pregnancy and the second trimester has the lowest risk of emergencies, but now I'm getting a lot of unsolicited advice from friends and family that they wouldn't step on a plane at all if they were pregnant, which is absolutely irritating for me. Both my husband and I plan to follow doctor advice throughout the pregnancy, not everyone's feelings. And while I have a low appetite for risk in general for this pregnancy due to how difficult it was for us to get pregnant, for some reason I'm more relaxed about flying probably because I fly a lot and I have the opportunity to do business class.

ThePeachGoose · 11/08/2024 13:37

@HopefulllHolly @AnnieStar12 @Fluffyted my midwife kept telling me that even without the pregnancy booklet, I'll have everything to read on MyChart, but I don't. That platform is only for appointments, letters and results. But you're right, maybe it doesn't matter, as it's all on the NHS website anyway and I'm lazily progressing through 2 pregnancy books, so I'm not completely in the dark.

Congratulations on a great week 12 scan @oliviagrace2307 and sorry to hear you've been struggling lately. Hopefully it will become easier soon and you're right, it will be worth it when you'll have your complete family. What a lovely scan memento you got there! I clearly need to move to Milton Keynes lol I'm good, thank you. So close to week 12 myself and while I was quite relaxed and confident in hitting that milestone, now I feel a bit more stressed with my recent red bleed, but hopefully it's all okay again. I'll know tomorrow.

@AnnieStar12 pleased to read you had a good scan and I'll definitely be riding the same train as you, with private scans interspersed with the NHS ones. It's too long to wait between the NHS ones if I keep getting bleeding scares and I was told that this haematoma might not heal by week 16.

Congratulations on your scan @summerchild92

@DippyDuck19 welcome home! I'm pleased you feel more relaxed now that you're home and with my pregnancy scares, I'll always recommend private scans if you have the means to, as you'll find out sooner if all is okay (and it usually is!) and you'll be able to relax sooner rather than waiting another 18 days. I'm pleased you got the chance to go away to Cornwall, though I don't envy your experience with your parents. Hope you were still able to enjoy it overall. Also, I'm so sorry to hear about your stressful hike! It's likely all fine and nothing to worry about, as babies are quite resilient in there after certain milestones. I wear an Apple Watch myself and I suspect that your heart rate took a while to come down because you were stressing out about it. I've stopped checking my vitals, I only check my sleeping stats, as the rest seem to fluctuate a lot and they don't seem to indicate anything useful anymore, when I know from my scans that all is going well despite temperature going down or resting heart rate being lower on some days. Unless you have a haematoma like myself, there's no guidance on heart rate elevation really. I think that the only sign you should follow is your body and the cramps, and that's what the midwife told me to do as well with my haematoma, as otherwise I wouldn't be able to do anything in my life lol The cramps are telling you to slow down and recover, but it's more like a warning rather than a sign of an issue. But a private scan will be able to put your worries to rest.

@HopefulllHolly I would fully recommend seeing a physio. NHS says it's perfectly safe and I've been going weekly more recently, mostly for my upper back and neck which I've always had issues with, and more so now because I haven't been able to work out since the stims phase due to my haematoma. But instead of living through the pain and likely putting more pressure on other muscles which then in turn will become painful, the physio can hopefully put you back together, and give you some tips and stretches to bring some relief on the longer term.

@Natty2 what a beautiful week 12 scan photo! Congratulations for crossing this milestone. How funny that the babies are living their own life in there, completely separate from your own and your own schedule lol

Congratulations on having a girl @Edf !!! I love seeing all these good news popping up in here

@jas1996 it was me with the book photos on Rh-! I hope it helped put your mind to rest, and so jelly you're in Mykonos right now. Hope you're having a relaxing, lovely time and everyone is tending to you with food, fruit and fun drinks. Have fun!

HopefulllHolly · 11/08/2024 13:43

Hey @DippyDuck19 Hope you had a good rest of time in Cornwall! Nice to be back in your own bed I’m sure 😊 You know me, I love a scan so I say go if it makes you feel better! 18 days is still almost 3 weeks really isn’t it and that’s a long time to wait if you’re worrying. Plus will be nice to see the little one ahead of the 20 week bad boy scan. I’m planning on going again the week after next 🤣 not for reassurance though (and sorry if TMI) my discharge seems to have gone through the roof. Yesterday it was like I had wet myself which has worried me a little though. Not sure if it’s normal or not as I’ve not really had much of anything until about 12 weeks and it’s steadily increased. Weird!

@ThePeachGoose Oooh glad your mum is taking good care of you and cooking lots of nice meals for you. How scary you’ve had bleeding again - I guess if the EPAU isn’t too worried then it’s probably fine but I’d definitely be worrying despite that. Hope it’s all ok tomorrow!
On travel - I’d definitely not shy away from it! The only reason we’re not going anywhere is because we’re spending a lot on the house and baby stuff plus a new car - so we’re going to go away when baby is tiny to Bali. It’s super common for people to do baby moons now and if I had the cash I absolutely would be packed and on the plane! Just make sure you have good travel insurance and have a wonderful time! (My mum was flappy when we were toying with the idea of a trip somewhere - I just dont think they’ve caught up with the times and guidance personally! If it makes you lovely and relaxed and you get some quality time together before you have a new addition then that is never a bad thing in my book!) ☺️☺️

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DippyDuck19 · 11/08/2024 14:18

@ThePeachGoose sounds like you've been having a lovely time with your mum! And sorry you've had another bleed but if not much red and now brown that's a good sign but glad the EPU are scanning you anyway!

@HopefulllHolly I have Friday off so may book a scan then but will mean going on my own as DP working.
As for discharge I've had loads and then it stopped for a few weeks around 13 weeks. And now it's back again. As long as it's normal colour, your body produces more mucous down there to help prevent infection.

oliviagrace2307 · 11/08/2024 14:26

Hello ladies hope you are having a lovely weekend and hopefully the sun is shining for everyone! We've booked in our next scan for 7th September to find out the gender which is on our wedding anniversary (6 years this year!) so will be a lovely present! Very excited to see the baby again in a couple of weeks.

@ThePeachGoose thanks for your lovely message! How are you doing? I'm so sorry you've had to go through the anxiety of bleeding it's super stressful I had both red and brown bleeding in my first trimester with my DS and i can totally empathise but everything with DS was fine. How are you feeling? When is your 12 week scan not long I hope! Our scan was lovely thank you, the photo is super clear and was so nice to see baby wriggling about!

jas1996 · 11/08/2024 15:00

@ThePeachGoose
I have my official NHS 12 week scan this thursday, on my exact 12 week date thank god 🙈 I’m currently in that phase i go through right before a scan where i convince myself im not pregnant again because i feel too normal … when will this stop? 🙈😂

Also, if your doctor says it’s ok to fly, fly! I just flew to Mykonos at 11 weeks, flying won’t affect the baby in any way and not sure if this is pessimistic but i told myself if something bad was going to happen, it’s going to happen in england or abroad so i may as well continue my life as much as possible. I don’t know about you but we really put a pause on life during IVF with appointments and injections etc, so now nothing is truly holding me to the UK i was outta there 🤣
(Typing this from a sunbed in 30 degree heat so would 10/10 recommend to a friend)

summerchild92 · 11/08/2024 18:04

Thanks everyone for your lovely messages. I was so nervous on the day of the scan … when the nurse went to measure my pressure I told her it might not be a good idea to do it BEFORE the scan as I was shaking. I haven’t seen a heartbeat prior to this 9w scan so I was nervous there wont be one 😬🫣 But in the end everything was alright … the blood pressure was on a high end of normal haha 😆 but still ok.

My next scan is on September 2nd at almost 13weeks, I will also get bloods done for NIPT then.

Fingers crossed everything will be ok then!

ThePeachGoose · 12/08/2024 09:51

@HopefulllHolly thanks for weighing in on the flying & love the Bali plan. That’s the idea of our babymoon, to just relax and enjoy our time together before our life will change dramatically and likely won’t be travelling as much for a while. Everyone says to get good travel insurance but what should I be looking for specifically? Whether they cover pregnant women and by what week? High value too?

@jas1996 thanks for sharing your first hand experience! I agree with you fully but people were annoyingly getting in my head about all this. I’ll stick to my guns and the doctor’s orders but really good to get some reassurance from this group too. And i get you, our life took a hit during IVF too, and we’ve had no holiday since last year, so this babymoon will be our much needed one in a while! What type of insurance did you get? Loving the sunbed lounging, enjoy every minute of it!

Also @jas1996 you’re approaching the big milestone! All fingers crossed for Thursday! I’m sure it will all be fine but I get you, I’m all fine until a couple of days before a scan and then I get nervous right before. Even though I’ve had a million scans before! But it’s definitely gotten easier overall

@oliviagrace2307 pleased to see you around here again and hope you’re feeling better. I’m okay, thanks for asking. I’m feeling calmer now than at the 6 weeks bleed because I know now that I have a haematoma and we’ve had so many reassurance scans (last one at 9+3), plus statistically it’s more likely that things will go well. But I’ll have this at the back of my mind until I get another reassurance scan and I’ll be super nervous on the way to the hospital today lol The gender scan will come around in no time and it will be a sweet anniversary present. We had our viability scan on our anniversary too and luckily it went well and it made the anniversary more special by seeing the little heartbeat.

@summerchild92 you’ve had the patience of a saint to hold off until 9 weeks for your first scan lol but so glad it went well and the next one will come around in no time!