IVF/ICSI April 2024

[Vian67]

Hopefully find others in a similar boat 🙏

Just made my ‘Day One’ call to the clinic this week to set the ball rolling this will be my second cycle, first one failed on 12th Feb 2024.

Bit of background to how we got here, I have had 4 ectopics since Nov 2020 2 resulting in emergency surgery and losing both my tubes. No reason why our first cycle failed, we will be doing IVF/ICSI this time round.

Anyone joining me in the April emotional rollercoaster? X

Morning Ladies, hope everyone is doing well. @Lucylaughing sorry to hear about your numbers, I imagine how frustrating it must feel… I’m still keeping everything crossed that this transfer works 🙏🏻

For those of you doing stims, hope you are feeling okay and not having too many side effects. Keep the ice pack coming to avoid major bruises 🤗 if any of you have DOR or previous experience with poor response to stims, can you please share what meds/dosage you’ve used and what seems to work best for you. I want to educate myself a bit better on different protocols ahead of my review consultation next month.

My collection yesterday went as well as it could have been - all 3 eggs collected, all mature. A positive note, if I can say from my 2 cycles, is that even though I’m a poor responder, whatever is available and they get seems to be good enough for the freezer. Last cycle 4 out of 5 were frozen, so my dropout rate is minimal.

@Crushed23 good luck on your egg collection tomorrow. How are you feeling and how was trigger last night? How many follicles they were able to see on scans? I’m with TVFC in Berkshire, to be honest compared to what I hear elsewhere here in the UK, I don’t have much bad to say about them. All staff has treated me nicely and never dismissed me when I have a question or concern. They are quick to respond and have things sorted too…very organized, from nurse planning meeting to scans, I know all that in advance. Despite the mishap mentioned a few days ago, which I will raise with consultant on my review meeting, I believe that’s just the world of fertility and that we have to educate and advocate for ourselves when we feel something “doesn’t feel right”. The thing is, knowing more now than when I first started on this journey, I understand that things are not an “exact science”…there are a lot of experimentation and “shots in the dark” on this field. For example, certain clinics favor certain medications over others…consultants might have different views on what works/doesn’t in terms of supplements, protocol, etc - but overall, every clinic has a system going on and tends to follow that for almost all of their patients that fall on so and so criteria (regardless of patients’ smaller particularities). It is sad, but based on what I’ve read here on forums and from friends that have also done IVF, it’s still a business first and foremost, so they are not as thorough as WE probably would like them to be bc that wouldn’t be too profitable to them 😏 in other words, you have to be proactive about it and educate yourself and not rely SOLELY on whatever people at your clinic say.

Hope all goes well for you tomorrow @Crushed23 let us know how you feel, we are here for you 🤗

@ViVRe thanks for your good wishes. I'm still very disappointed but less upset than yesterday. Like you say, so much of this process is unknown and down to luck. I'm so glad to see your EC went well and you got 3 mature eggs. My experience is proof that more eggs doesn't necessarily mean more good quality embryos. We went from 12 mature down to nothing suitable to freeze / give us a good chance. Really hoping these 3 do well for you.

Our day 6 update was that the few they were keeping an eye on mostly developed further overnight but nothing was A/B quality, so nothing to freeze.

I've asked about getting access to our notes to pass to a different clinic (really would be better to have something closer to home, all the driving has been tiring in itself) and we will have a consultation after our test results so at least we can ask questions as to what can be done differently on the next try.

The embryologist I spoke to today said not to lose hope as it is possible to be pregnant from the two embryos transferred yesterday, but I feel it's more reasonable to be pragmatic. I think our chances are very low from my googling.

I'll pop back and see how everyone else is doing. Good luck to you all x

Thank you @ViVRe !

The trigger shot last night was okay. I’ve actually had very few symptoms during the whole process so far and I am wondering if I’ve been under-stimulated. It’s quite worrying! For one thing, most of my follicles are still really short and have no chance of producing a mature egg.

It’s been a learning curve and I’ll definitely go into my second cycle with a better knowledge of what to ask and what my body can handle.

Congrats on your egg collection! Take yourself out to celebrate getting through it 🤗

Failed egg collection.

Trigger shot didn’t work. Over half the follicles already wasted. Taking a different trigger tonight and going back in a couple of days to see if they can retrieve anything from the very few follicles left.

I am beyond devastated. ‘Emotional rollercoaster’ doesn’t even begin to explain the last few months for me. I feel like I have wasted my life and will have nothing to show for it. Plus it’s £6.5k from my single-person savings down the drain.

Not sure how I am going to climb out of the emotional hole I’m in and move on any time soon. 😞

So sorry to read this was there any indication or explanation giving to why it wouldn't work?

Hoping the trigger tonight works and the next one is more successful 🙏

My consultant popped in to see me after and just said “it’s incredibly bad luck”, but I wonder if she felt like she couldn’t go into the details while I was in floods of tears and was focused on trying not to worry me? So I have no idea if there was a medical reason for this. Perhaps we’ll go through this on our final consultation when everything is done.

I always knew I would need multiple cycles but I think I need to increase my budget because this cycle is basically a write-off.

So sorry to hear that Crushed.
Thats not even a possibility that I’ve prepared for

Fingers crossed for you that the second trigger gives you a positive outcome

So sorry @Crushed23! I don’t think I’ve read anything about the trigger failing before. Maybe once you have a bit of a less emotional head you can speak to the nurse and consultant and get some answers. If it’s a failed cycle in some clinics you might be able to get some money back?
Sending you hugs xxx

I’ve just read what I can online @Crushed23 and maybe it’s that you ovulated before the trigger? Or that they were over the size they should have been so gone? Either way, hopefully you can get something from the remaining eggs, and next cycle the doctors should know to monitor you much more closely so it doesn’t happen. Really sorry how it’s gone for you, I haven’t prepared myself for that outcome so I’m sure it’s a total shock and really sad and hard for you. Hope you have someone close to give you a big cuddle xx

Thanks @HopefulllHolly The doctor did say it was very rare, so I have just been unlucky. Perhaps they would have seen if I had ovulated when they were trying to collect the eggs?

They seemed happy to give me a different trigger shot and try again anyway.

I am not getting my hopes up, there aren’t many follicles left for them to retrieve from. So the whole cycle is basically a write-off. I need to make sure I push for much closer monitoring next time.

I just hate how much of my time and energy this process has taken. I had the consultation and fertility MOT in mid January then due to various delays (that I won’t go into) it’s mid April and I’m thousands of pounds down and made no progress.

I was hoping to have all of this out of the way by summer so I could have a second half of the year that wasn’t riddled with stress and anxiety, but that’s now shot to shit.

I don’t know how to feel better about this (and I’m usually quite a positive person, believe it or not).

What have people’s experience been with their nurses?

I’ve dealt with two nurses at my clinic who have both been cold and curt with me. It’s like they can’t be bothered to be friendly. My consultant on the other hand has been absolutely fantastic, and she is the only reason I’ll be using this clinic for subsequent cycles.

@Crushed23 Im sorry 😔

Yeah they would have seen you had ovulated (when I went for a scan when I first started the process the consultant showed me the ovary I had ovulated from so I guess it’s easy to spot).

In maybe more positive news though, there is a thing called duo-stim where I think you do one stim then they do egg collection and then another stim and egg collection back to back, which sounds like what you’re doing. And from what I’ve read duo-stim gets better results, so you might be lucky? 🍀 I’m no medical expert just an avid researcher (it helps me feel calm knowing the good and the bad) but I’m hoping it will be positive for you too.

Either way, you’ve got an extra go from this cycle which is better than waiting another long month, so keep your chin up and think positive thoughts.

Im like you, we had our first consultant and scan back in December so it’s felt like a stupidly long wait to our first round, which is annoying when I’m not getting any younger. Everything is on hold, my little brothers wedding is in Malaysia later this year and I can’t say to him whether we can go, we have no spare money really and being so strict with food and all the fun things in life is gruelling. I’ve missed so many social events already because I just don’t have the emotional energy or willpower to sit through it while everyone else is drinking and eating what they like and I’m just sat worrying about IVF and how many carbs I’m eating 😖

So yeah, I feel you on the time thing!!

Hope you feel a bit more hopeful after a sleep xx

@HopefulllHolly God yes, I’ve had no social life for 4 months!

I need to check with my doctor when it’s best to do the second cycle. I want to do it in May (so my first period after the post-EC bleed), but that might be too soon and it might be worth giving my body a break. But then the more I delay the more that the third and fourth cycle will eat into the summer…

@Crushed23 Maybe see how you feel once you’ve had this second stim and egg collection. You might feel motivated to do it in May or might want a rest. As much as you’ll want to get on with it you also don’t want to burn out physically from it.

I can’t see from your posts - so you’re doing this single (which is amazing), are you just collecting eggs or are you using a sperm donor? I’m guessing you’re banking eggs but didn’t want to assume!

Im like you where I know ill want to go straight on to the next round after the first cycle (I’ve already prepared myself for at least 3 cycles, and have already written off the first cycle for my sanity!). I have low egg count and a low AMH so we only have 18% chance of a cycle working according to the consultant, so by those percentages I’ll need 5 cycles 😖😫 oh god I don’t even want to let my mind go there, I will likely run out of time before doing 5 cycles!

@HopefulllHolly Yes, doing this single and just freezing :)

My consultant gave me a range in terms of the number of eggs to aim for (for my age etc.) and I will definitely need multiple cycles, which I am prepared for, however with an essentially failed cycle behind me, it’s looking like ‘at least 4’ instead of the ‘at least 3’ I was hoping for.

Are you going through IVF with a partner? Best of luck, I hope my story hasn’t freaked you out - it really is very very rare for a trigger shot to not work at all!

@Crushed23 Good for you, I wish I had frozen my eggs but I never had the money when I was single 🤣 too busy out partying so double good work!! Do you have friends you can rant to? I bet it’s quite an empowering but isolating thing to do solo.

That’s good you have a range to work towards, and I guess the first round is always a test round to see how you respond. An effing expensive test but the next round I’m sure theyll tweak it for you so it works as it should have. And you’re not out for this round just yet, you’ll likely get some eggs still! Did they say how many you had that weren’t quite big enough before you triggered?

No no not at all. There’s a million things on my list that could go wrong to be honest. I’m 37 so my egg quality isn’t great, my other half has Nemo’s that swim the wrong way and are a funny shape, and I have a low egg count for my age too. So there’s loads to go badly, but we won’t know until we try. I’m interested to see how it goes to be honest, I’ve prepared for the worst so at the very least I can learn a lot and be able to set some realistic expectations for myself rather than just having to wonder. Like you I am actually a really positive person but I’ve really had to ground myself through all of this. But fingers crossed! We’re doing our absolute best aren’t, and that’s all we can do! 😊

@HopefulllHolly Yes, I have a few friends who I have told and they’ve been very supportive. I’m quite unusual in that I haven’t told family (they’re generally incredibly judgemental and them knowing wouldn’t add anything positive - but that’s a whole other thread!) which means I have to hide how I’m feeling when I talk to them, and I’ve been avoiding visiting them over the last few months just while I get through this first cycle which I’m getting grief for. But apart from that, I feel supported 😊

Totally agree that we’re doing the best we can - who knows, maybe our future selves will thank us for going through all this turmoil!

@Crushed23 Oh bless you. That’s a shame your family aren’t there to help you. To be honest my mum did not understand IVF at all (years ago she once said to me that those who need it shouldn’t have them 😫😤🤬) but since she’s known we have to do it she’s completely changed as she knows how badly we want a baby. She’s fully researched it and knows it all now, which is so sweet. So I’ve been really surprised, maybe they will surprise you if you tell them in the future. I get what you mean though, it’s easier and not worth the grief they give you to just do it privately.

Fingers crossed we can both check in one day (hopefully not so far away) with good news or little families. That’s the dream!

Hope you feel better tomorrow, keep me posted on the next stims and collection. When’s the date for them? Sometimes things feel easier in the morning so I hope that’s the case for you xx

@Crushed23 I am so incredibly sorry to hear about what happened to you today. Gosh, I had no idea that was even possible…did they say you ovulated earlier or that the trigger didn’t work? (What trigger did you have? Have you taken an HCG test to check if it is your system? Were you not taking any suppressants to prevent early ovulation?) Also, did you make it to procedure and then when you woke up they told you all of this? When was your last scan prior to collection?

Sorry about all the questions, really don’t mean to pry, but this is all so utterly strange and confusing, so once you get through the hurdle of this second trigger shot/collection I think it is definitely worth it questioning the clinic about all these things and how it all happened. That’s a whole lot of money, stress and putting your body through a lot especially if there were good potential eggies in there that went to waste, if no refund at the very least they owe you a proper explanation.

I can only imagine how devastated you must be feeling today…this journey truly is a rollercoaster, but I hope you know we are here for you. We are on this boat together and tomorrow is another day…keeping everything crossed for you 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼

Re. Nurses: I think it depends, I have a closer/better relationship with the nurses and midwifes at my clinic than I do with consultant. I only saw/spoke to consultant on initial meeting, review consultation after cycle and procedure day. I hope that there are at least a few nurses that you feel more comfortable with than those two that treated you poorly…maybe make it known on reception or with your consultant that whenever possible you would prefer to have your scans/procedures with nurses that have treated you better.

Re. Social Life: yep, this process definitely affects all aspects of that…financially, what we eat/drink, traveling, family life, work, our surroundings, monitoring the stressors, etc - after 1yr3months in it, it has definitely taken a toll in day to day life with my husband, so I’ve decided to take a 6 month break after this cycle to have a breather bc I’ve been thinking about FERTILITY non-stop, 24/7 this last year. I still set certain goals related to it (like start to use less plastic, increasing sun exposure, and in 3 months time start new supplements, but overall I want to enjoy summer without worrying too much about it). I hope you can get your next cycle done in May, so that you can enjoy a bit of your summer too! 🤗

sending you a big hug and I hope you are able to get a proper rest tonight!

Hello how is everyone going today?

I had my halfway scan,it's nhs so was in and out in record time so no real time for questions,hoping someone might have the answer here !

I had 6 eggs in left ovary and 4 in right,however due to where my right ovary is the consultant isn't sure he can reach it during collection and might have to forgo them eggs...said ill be heavilty sedated so they can try their best.

if they dont reqch it does this mean I can't have a fresh transfer ? I am funded for one fresh and one frozen transfer so really hoping I don't have to forgo any chances.

@Hopingtobe4 No, they’ll just get the 6 eggs and see which mature ok and one of those will be your fresh hopefully 😊

Aw ok I thought I would maybe have to wait for a period for the other eggs to go if they can't collect them ?

@Hopingtobe4 no they would just disappear on their own (I think they get absorbed in to your body) 😊
It’s really common for consultants not to be able to reach one of your ovaries. One of mine is higher up too but my consultant has got something to enable him to reach them (not sure what it is, he did tell me but it was a technical name)

@Hopingtobe4 hi, I had the same issue flagged on my scan but they managed to reach my ovary fine on the day so it was not worth worrying about. I actually wish they hadn't mentioned it, but I guess it would be worse if they couldn't reach it and you weren't prepared. I asked about it on the morning of EC and the main nurse was pretty confident it would be fine and it was, so hopefully yours will be the same x