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Infertility

Our Infertility Support forum is a space to connect with others in the same position, discuss causes, treatment and IVF, and share infertility stories of hope and success.

Original poster

Trying to conceive baby#2 following ivf treatment for #1

998 replies

lucieloos · 17/03/2018 18:34

I thought I would start this thread as I can't see anything similar. We underwent many rounds of icsi and following a couple of bfns, and an ectopic pregnancy we were finally blessed with our beautiful daughter last year.

We recently started thinking about baby no 2 and had 4 frozen embryos of which 2 had been tested and found to be chromosomally normal so are meant to have a better chance. We didnt have the other 2 tested.

A couple of weeks back we had our first fet with one of the tested embryos and got a bfp super early at 4dp5dt. Sadly by 8dpt the line was barely visible and resulted in a chemical pregnancy. I've been feeling really down about it as this was meant to be a super duper embryo with no genetic problems which they said was the main reason embryos fail.

I thought it would be easier trying for #2 and of course it is in a way as I realise how lucky I am to have had a baby but I can feel the infertility fog starting to descend again as I realise although I've had a brief respite I will never be like my fertile friends and I do really want another baby and a sibling for my little girl.

Im feeling a bit negative at the moment. We will probably go back for the other tested embryo in the near future but I can't see how I would ever get lucky enough to get 2 bfps in a row. These things just don't happen to me so just not too hopeful about it at all. We said that if we used all of our frosties with no success we would be happy with what we have but already I am thinking should I do more fresh cycles. I will be 39 soon though so time isn't on my side for that.

Anyway just wondering if anyone else is in a similar situation and would like to share the journey. Please come and say hi.

OP posts:
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PonyPals · 11/06/2018 11:07

@Mountainsoutofmolehills
You do come across very bitter and I know infertility can twist a person until they become an ugly version of themselves. But just because someone has 1 child it doesn't diminish their want for a second one.
Second infertility can be very hard and it is an individual pain. Perhaps keep your frustrations to your self and try to be supportive.

twinkledag · 11/06/2018 11:23

Thank you @PonyPals Thanks

twinkledag · 12/06/2018 20:02

I just wanted to come back and thank everyone for your (mostly!) helpful replies. They were so informative and useful.

I have spoken to my clinic today. They have advised if we want to try again to spend 3 months getting DH healthy to see if the sperm improves.

So we're going to take a break for a while. I may pop in and say hello from time to time.

Wishing you all all the best Thanks

Snowdayfet · 12/06/2018 23:07

Twinkle that sounds like a good plan. All the very best. Come back and update us on your progress! I really hope everything works out for you Flowers

Original poster
lucieloos · 13/06/2018 07:52

Good luck twinkle x

OP posts:
Cariad2017 · 13/06/2018 08:58

Good luck Twinkle. I’ll be rooting for you. Do keep us posted as to how it goes.

PonyPals · 13/06/2018 11:49

Good luck @twinkledag

Snowdayfet · 13/06/2018 21:47

Still spotting. Scan tomorrow. Dreading it Sad

Jenbot78 · 13/06/2018 22:23

Haven't been on for a while as nothing doing round here till I get thyroid test results...twinkle so sorry to hear about failed cycle. A break sounds good and I'm you will feel stronger for the next cycle after a break. Back to back cycles sound hardgoing (though this is what we will end up doing if FET 1 fails...if I ever get there that is...)

pony couldn't have said it better myself. If anything the infertility pain is worse the second time around as you realise how lovely being a mum is.

twinkle hang in there. Good luck tomorrow 🤞

Jenbot78 · 13/06/2018 22:24

God sorry can tell it's late...I meant good luck snow. Sorry twinkle

Original poster
lucieloos · 13/06/2018 22:39

Good luck snow will be thinking of you.

OP posts:
Snowdayfet · 14/06/2018 12:31

Thanks guys. Everything intact - foetus measuring 8+4 so right on track with a little head and arms. So relieved.

Doctor couldn’t find any obvious reason for the bleeding so just said to sit tight for the 12 week scan. Fingers crossed!

Original poster
lucieloos · 14/06/2018 20:30

That's amazing news snow well done! Hope you can relax a little now.

OP posts:
Snowdayfet · 14/06/2018 20:57

Thanks lucie. I don’t think I’ll fully relax until the 12w scan but it’s good to have he reassurance for now. Anyway, am relieved and happy and grateful.

Hope you are feeling ok too!

HelloMist · 16/06/2018 10:50

I'm sorry Twinkledag. It's good you are going to take some time out.

So pleased the scan was good news snowday. Hope you don't get much more spotting now.

I'm carrying on with the crinone and progynova and just waiting for Tuesday now. Will be desperately hoping that our single embryo thaws OK so transfer can go ahead.

twinkledag · 18/06/2018 20:18

Good luck for tomorrow @HelloMist Thanks

Snowdayfet · 19/06/2018 12:27

Good luck for today hellomist

Jenbot78 · 19/06/2018 18:09

Hope all went ok today mist…

Nothing new this end just waiting and waiting some more. Had latest thyroid test and will find out the results of this in a couple of days. All set to go at beginning of next cycle on 3/4 July if this was well UNTIL...

I decided to go to the doctor about a lump I thought I might have found in my boob. My boobs are pretty lumpy anyway especially since stopping breastfeeding 6 months ago. Anyway he had a good feel around (awks) and just generally said I had lumpy breasts so difficult to tell and I should go to the breast clinic, appointment in two to three weeks (aaarghh!) So now we are stuck waiting for this.

Actually the appointment is likely only to be a day or two after starting Progynova IF we start the next cycle so I am a bit torn about whether to go ahead with this anyway or wait another month. I read the stats; only 10 percent of those who go to breast clinic have anything wrong...So I'm not too worried (well a bit worried maybe but trying not to worry.)

DH thinks we should wait another month, I am unsure...The other thing that is making me indecisive is that we have two weddings (Friday and Saturday) on the same weekend in July, one four hours drive away and the other two so need to drive between them. By my calculations embryo transfer would be three days after that. I worry that being physically exhausted won't be good for embryo transfer, or does it not really make any difference?

On the other hand, I would love to just get on with it. By my calculations even if this FET cycle works I would be just turned 41 by the time DC came along, this is SO old in my books! I just had this thing about not wanting to be older than 40 before having another one. I know it's silly, it's just everything turned out so differently than I expected (thought I would have completed my family by now.)

I don't know, I guess I am just SO fed up of waiting. We thought we were starting the FET in May and still no sign of it starting.

Any thoughts ladies? I realise that this is quite a long post! Sorry!

Jenbot78 · 19/06/2018 18:39

Also, just to add with the age thing...I don't want to offend anyone who is 41 plus on here! I think I am just thinking what if these two FETS don't work, will be knocking on to be doing a fresh round again....

I'll shut up now. Thanks for listening to my rantings!

HelloMist · 19/06/2018 19:54

Thanks Jenbot, Snowday. It went well! More after replies.

Oh Jenbot, keep us updated. Hope it isn't anything to worry about. Perhaps your DH has a point if delaying will mean the weddings aren't right before transfer? I've felt tired enough on the drugs without travel and social occasions to handle. The wait must be very frustrating but one more month won't be so bad really. Just my thoughts though.

AFM, one blast on board. Still can't quite believe it as was really preparing myself for the worst. I know it failing to thaw was unlikely but with only one frozen I was quite anxious, or at least thought that it would be downgraded after thaw as has happened before. It actually got graded up. :)

Now we have the horrible wait ahead but I'm happy we've got the best chance we could. This might be our last go so it seems a good place to draw the line if that's where we end up.

HelloMist · 19/06/2018 20:33

Forgot to say ET was a bit nail-biting briefly as the doctor said my cervix was at a funny angle today. She had to give up with the original tube and the embryologist went back into her room with the embryo. Then they managed it with a different tube and said all went well. It felt like a very long few minutes and was a little uncomfortable. I couldn't see the screen past a staff member so only got to see a replay which wasn't quite as magical! And was scared to speak in case I distracted them. All good now though. Smile

Snowdayfet · 20/06/2018 07:53

PUPO! Congrats mist. Keeping everything crossed for you.

jen really hoping your tests all come back ok. I personally would go to the weddings and have a great time. But I am relatively unfazed by travel. I would go, have a right old knees up and then have your transfer and take it easy after that.

DuchyDuke · 20/06/2018 09:51

I was told by my embryologist that the freezing process itself can cause embryo destruction. She was trying to make me feel better I think because I probably won’t have anything to freeze - but you need to gain some perspective? What’s the worst that can happen? You have to do egg collection again - you did it before and it worked and you can do it again. Think positive!

twinkledag · 20/06/2018 12:11

Oh @Jenbot78 you sound so fed up, I feel for you. I hope your tests come back clear.

Might be worth waiting if you feel like everything is happening at the same time?

Jenbot78 · 22/06/2018 09:55

Thanks for all your kind words ladies! Think I am just a bit sick of the waiting...

Mist the waiting is torture isn't it? Keeping everything crossed for you! Duchy thanks yes you're right, I can do IVF again as have managed it before. The physical process doesn't concern me too much more I am concerned about my age for doing a fresh cycle if these two embryos don't work. But I am getting ahead of myself. If there is one thing that I have learned on this journey it's to take one step at a time and try not to think about what's next all the time as you just can't predict the outcome!