TTC for 18 months or more. Moving onto IUI/IVF/ICSI -part 2

[bluebird3]

We have relocated from the conception board where we were previously chatting under the thread 'ttc for 10 months or more'. A lot of us are now long term ttc-ers and are going through infertility treatment or looking to take steps in this direction so we feel this might be a more suitable home for us!

Feel free to stop by and say hi and hopefully we can share the journey together and make it a little easier along the way!

Thanks maple that's exciting you are starting so soon. Yes I was expecting the hard sell too!

Hello Scottish yes that thread was rather annoying, I haven't gone back to it since. Sorry you got a mouthful elsewhere - it's a shame you can't have a reasonable debate and share opinions without it getting nasty on some of these boards.

I'm glad conception and infertility are so friendly!

Happy Friday girls, hope you are all doing well.

DH got his third SA back today and it was very good - he's at 96% abnormal forms with a high count and motility.

Technically he's now in the normal range. He has to do one more SA for the hospital before our follow up appointment - that's where they refer us.

I don't know now if they will refer us or not?

I mean its amazing, I'm absolutely delighted, but we are not conceiving?!

Hey London, that's really good news... maybe his sperm has been moving in the right direction and hopefully you could be successful in the next few months. Keep trying, but push for a referral anyway - if it doesn't happen you'll want the option of ivf, believe me.

Geeup, how was your scan today? Are you starting stims?

Happy Friday everyone

Thanks star, yes hopefully we won't need it, but I want the option!

Ah yes gee I hope your scan went well today hon

Hi all, sorry to pop in and out...my weeks are quite busy lately and I can't get sucked into MN too much.

London, congrats on the new sperm count. My DH had the same, his second was just into the normal limit, but only just barely. Our consultant said he would still refer us for IVF as we have been 14 months TTC and the low normal SA is an indication for ICSI.

Gee, hope the scan went well...please update us when you have a mo.

Scottish, sorry for the abuse on another thread. Glad we have the supportive of the lovely gals here. I find it hard too to not read conception articles (and anything really related to pregnancy.)

KCT, how are you feeling?

Shary, welcome...we all hope none of us is a permanent member but are happy to support each other whilst we're here

I forget who mentioned about talking to DHs about taking care of their bits in this journey. I find it quite hard too as we are being referred partly/mostly for MFI. DH is optimistic that we will have a baby with our genes and doesn't seem to understand my concerns and sadness. I gently nag him to take his Wellman conception vitamin, but he seems to think that science will save us, which is frustrating as we've really only got a 30% chance on our one NHS round. In fairness, he limits himself to one drink per night and doesn't smoke, but is happy to sit with a bag of crisps in front of the telly at night and isn't a great fan of veg. I suppose it is a balancing act between feeling normal and tyring to do what's best for TTC. I wonder also whether men feel ashamed with MFI and so are more resistant to our suggestions to cut out drinking, mates nights at the pub, etc..?

Happy Friday and BW for a peaceful weekend.
xx

Meadow - totally understand. My DH definitely thinks science will save us. Hasn't really curbed his drinking (doesn't drink loads but would easily have 3 pints at a sitting at the weekend).
London - great news on your SA. That is my dream but we haven't had much luck shifting the dial on DHs results :(
I had my baseline scan and all good to start menopur (stims) tomorrow so that's good news. Onwards and upwards!
Happy Friday all!

Great news geeup, fingers crossed for the next stage. And also great news for you london... Fingers crossed it keeps getting better.

Hope you all have good, relaxing weekends. I'm in the middle of the 2ww but still in the optimistic first week!

Fingers crossed for you jelly. Hope everyone had a nice weekend. I did some rugby watching and gardening!
I'm on day 2 of menopur (2 vials) - what a massive faff!! Buserlin feels like a walk in the park now. Counting down the days till it's just the pessaries to deal with. Had my first proper headache this morning but managed to get 3 litres of water down throughout the day so feeling better now.
How's everyone else?

Well done gee and jelly! You're both getting there and fx you'll have the results you want in a few weeks!

london great news about your dh's sa. Many couples take up to 2 years to conceive so you could still be on your way to a natural bfp...possibly it's just been bad luck that it's taking so long.

Hope everyone else is well. I read up every few days but don't have much to add. I'm really struggling with my emotions. 2 weeks past - hpt and I'm still having some light bleeding. :( most days I feel like I could burst into tears at any second, but they never come....even if I want them too. don't know if I'll ever feel positive about this process again.

Oh bluebird you poor thing. Is there anything you enjoy doing that you could try and do more of? Baking, swimming, maybe an art class or yoga class? I wonder if it might help a bit to having something to look forward to each week? I can't imagine how difficult it is and my heart goes out to you.

Blue I'm so sorry you are feeling crappy and low 2 weeks, although seems long in ttc terms, isn't that long. Give yourself time and love, don't be hard on yourself. I hope you can find some things to try and not think about it too much, although I know it's easy and will always be plaguing your thoughts. We are all here for you to rant / cry / scream at

Scottish I didn't see that thread - don't think I'll go and look for it either!!

London great news about SA! How long have you been trying again? I'm unexplained so technically no reason not to conceive but haven't.. IVF can sometimes be seen as a diagnostic tool so not sure if they will find anything!

Gee hope the stabbing is going ok! Have you got another scan soon?

Star I think you have your protocol appointment today - good luck! Presume they are likely to reduce the dose this time?

Yes star I meant to ask what dose of menopur (or gonal) you were on. Hopefully they get the dose right this next time!
My next scan is Friday to see how follies are doing. Am being pretty good on the high protein so far. Been adding chia seeds and nuts to everything and reduced but not eliminated my carb portions. Hardest bit for me is to stop snacking between meals as I'm a natural grazer but clinic said to not snack to try and keep blood sugar level. Day 4 today of stimming (hopefully) 10 more to go!

Blue, so sorry you are struggling. It feels like the lows with infertility are unbearable. I have also had the no tears left feeling....it is really a cruel despair and when you are sad and can't cry anymore, I think that is a sign of depression. Are you able to attend any counselling? Perhaps you would find it useful?

Hi everyone,
So sorry Blue, I know the feeling. I woke up in the night and cried silently for two hours at the hopelessness of our situation. I'm on cd2 today which explains it a bit, but the underlying sadness is always there. Take heart from what the drs said, give yourselves time and when you're ready look forward to the next cycle.

Well done gee, so pleased things are going well. Good luck for Friday. Gee I didn't get any of those instructions... I'm gonna make notes for next time!

Yes, had my protocol appointment and they've changed to short protocol. Start 125 gonal f straight off the pill then add in cetrotide after 5 days. Scans and blood tests on days 4 and 8 to check I'm responding but not over responding. Also putting me on metformin which theoretically can help avoid overstimulation. I've been on it before (because of my high antral follicle count) and it gave me a horrid stomach. Dr said I can ditch it if it doesn't agree with me, but I'll give it a go. Feel really happy with the drs at Kings. Can't start til May though so more waiting than I thought but not too bad.
That's the good news. However, because something has to go wrong every time, the administrator is now saying that they won't fund me as I've moved out of the borough. Even though the ccg rules say you only need to be registered in the borough and my gp is happy to keep me registered. Grr. They won't book me in until this is resolved! I really don't want to go through the whole process of registering at my new borough and getting a referral and ccg decision again, so hopefully they'll see sense.

Hope everyone doing well. Maple, not long til you get going.

Hello, i'm 37, have been TTC 4 years have done one round of ICSI that didn't work and about to start 2nd ICSI cycle. Have unexplained infertilty. Feeling very negative about the whole hing, never had a BFP never used birth control just think im not built for it and worried we are throwing money away. Anyone had any positive stories to keep spirits up? I am so fed up :(

Ive never posted on a board before so incase i have put my post in the wrong place i apologise :)

Good to hear they have a new plan for you Star. Will have everything crossed for you that it works a treat!
Welcome boo. Sorry you find yourself here but it's a great supportive group.
So I just got babybombed but from a friend who's first baby took years and 3 rounds of ivf. She wasn't trying but it's happened. Feel happy for her and better than I would have done if I wasn't half way through a cycle but she's the second friend in my group of 7 to announce her 2nd pregnancy in a month. Now I'm just dying for this cycle to work so I can join them. If it doesn't it's going to be so so hard watching them have their second babies when I can't even have my first. Trying not to put pressure on myself but failing miserably. So scared now for my scan on Friday incase the drugs aren't working. Anyone know the percentage chance of icsi working first cycle attempt?

Thanks everyone. Have been feeling really sad lately and have considered whether I'd benefit from counselling. It's weird bc I do counselling in my job so feel like I know all the strategies and things they will say but still struggle to take them on board from myself. Maybe it would be useful to hear it from someone else.

Glad things are well planned star. Hope it's smoother this round. And fx they get the chance issue resolved. Sounds like one more problem you don't need!

Welcome boo. Sorry you find yourself here but everyone is lovely and supportive. It's nice to have a place to chat where people get it.

gee... babybombs are the worst. Especially when it's their 2nd. I'm dealing with the same and also have lots of Pregnant ladies at work and ladies just back from mat leave. So it's all baby talk all the time and I just want to curl up and cry when it starts. My clinic told me that ICSI is a 1 in 3 chance of working. Hope this round is a winner for you.

Hi Everyone, Thanks for the support! The whole infertility thing is so isolating sometimes, i spoke to my DH last night and he is amazingly supportive but cant understand how obsessed you get by it all, it being my body etc. I literally cant focus on anything else and I feel like my life is on hold. I spoke to a friend the other day who had been trying for three years but was too ashamed to tell anyone, its only because i am so open about my IVF that she felt like she could say something. Anyone else feel like that? I think like everything in life comparing yourself to others is nothing more than futile and depressing but its so hard not to feel jealous when people get pregnant so quickly. Im glad to meet you all :)

What you said is how I feel boo. Hopelessly unfair and futile.

Maple we're at 16 months now. I'm pretty sure the morphology has had something to do with it, but like you say it could just be bad luck. He's got yet another SA to do in two weeks so fx we see same or more improvement

Star sounds like great progress and May is not far off. I hadn't thought too much about changing CCG - we're about to move to a different borough in London and that means different CCG. I really hope we don't have to start again

Welcome booboo sorry you find yourself here but I hope you find the support helpful. When do you start your next ICSI? I'm totally obsessed by it all too - it's never far from my thoughts and my life feels like it's been in two week segments for the last 16 months. It's so encompassing. Glad to hear you have a supportive DH that makes such a difference

Gee I sincerely hope it works for you and you can join the excitement with your friends. I'm sure I've read that IVF when it's male factor has some of the highest success rates as it bypasses that problem - and there is nothing known that's wrong with you or your uterus. Fx for you and for Friday

Hugs bluebird I think that's a really good idea to have some counselling. I also second gee's advice to do some activities you enjoy - it can make a difference

Booboo Welcome. Sorry that you find yourself here . I am one of those people only my DM, DSis and one close friend know's (Unexplained for over 2 years). I would love to tell people but ... i just cant. Not yet (Im a happy person and dont want the shadow of infertility in public when people talk to me.(I really dont want to be seen as that poor woman))

London thats fantastic about the SA.

Geeup I have my fingers crossed this works for you.

Blue There are no words i could say that will make you feel better but please remember that we all have you in our thoughts Counselling sounds like a good idea... I know that you said that you do counselling in your work but sometimes just a chat helps.

Hope everyone is doing well. Wishing massive BFP's for everyone

London, all I would say is think carefully before changing your address with the GP. I'm currently waiting for a call from my GP today to let me know whether they are happy to let the CCG fund my treatment even though I'm currently out of the borough. The clinic thinks they won't want to put that in writing and then I really don't know what to do. It's making me so anxious the thought i'll have to wait even longer for treatment - had another sleepless night last night. If you're far off treatment, say 6 months, then I'd maybe risk it so there's a good chance of getting all the paperwork lined up without affecting things.

blue. My partner and I tried counselling and whilst i don't think I found the right therapist for me, he found it hugely helpful. I would give it a go if I were you - this is so so hard to go through.

Gee, I heard success rates are about 40% and you have a really good chance with confirmed male factor. Good luck tomorrow - hope you see good progress.

I am getting so terrified we have some horrible underlying issue- it's been over 2 years now, latest SA absolutely fine, consultant confirmed fibroid location shouldn't have any impact and yet nothing. So desperate to do an ivf round to at least see if anything is being fertilised or if I have crappy eggs or what.

Welcome booboo, it's such a long old road. Hope you have success soon.

Maple, do you have your drugs yet? Have you signed all the consent forms and ready to go?!

London/star - re changing address. When we started fertility testing I was still registered at my family doctors with my parents house as my address I just always liked my family GP so never moved and parents are quite close (but different CCG). My husband was registered at a different practice near our actual house. That caused no end of problems (married couples are supposed to live together to have ivf haha!!). In short, our consultant couldn't put in our paperwork till we were both registered at the same doctors in the same CCG and a lot of paperwork was sent through the mail to our house. Do whatever you think best but I'd be wary of trying to play the system - there seemed to be checks in place to stop exactly that and if anything it slowed down our decision because I'd tried to hedge my bets.

Hmm sounds like an absolute minefield! Do you think I should contact my local CCG to ask? I really don't want setting back any further.

We move a week tomorrow.

We could keep popping back to previous address to pick up post? It's not that far from where we are moving to. Hmmmmmmmmmmmm