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Infertility

Our Infertility Support forum is a space to connect with others in the same position, discuss causes, treatment and IVF, and share infertility stories of hope and success.

Anyone starting IVF? Join me (5)

505 replies

waitingimpatient · 10/02/2016 21:11

I don't think anyone has started the new thread yet? Apologies if so and ignore this one if its already been done

I'm hoping by the end of this thread I'll be waiting and impatient for a new arrival Smile fingers crossed

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Indecisivejo · 04/03/2016 07:02

Shellster (I'm on my phone so can't see the bold lettering thing at bottom, why am I so thick ha ha)
I had a blastocyst transfer Saturday how many days does that make me?! Don't know when they count it from?! Mine was a natural fet cycle.

Waiting, everyday is a bad day for me at mo so I feel your pain! I am constantly refreshing this page all day seeing if you or anyone is here to talk to because I'm going crazy I can't cope! I can't help but think this hasn't worked I've just got that feeling plus these cramps are typical period cramps and I would be naturally due on any time now so feel like it's just waiting for me to stop the crinone gel then will come! All I keep hearing is embryologist saying it's still collapsed no signs of expansion (it didn't even actually meet the grade for freezing but they froze it anyway as was freezing another one from same cycle) :(

waitingimpatient · 04/03/2016 10:04

It's hard isn't it, you want it to work so badly but feel the odds are against it, I just feel at the moment I can't possibly get a bfp as I don't have any pg symptoms. Dh has been trying to reassure me that if it doesn't work this time we can keep trying. I'm 34 so feel like I'm getting on a bit now !

I think I will end up testing this weekend. I'm so impatient

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Indecisivejo · 04/03/2016 10:39

Yes it is. If this doesn't work I think it's game over for me now. I'm 34 too.
If you do test will you let me know? My other half told me I have to wait til proper day lol.

Indecisivejo · 04/03/2016 11:25

I'm like a woman possessed! One min I want to murder someone and next I want to cry til I have no tears left! Cramps really bad today sharp too and pink spotting

waitingimpatient · 04/03/2016 11:58

Yes I'll post on here if I test. I think I may test sun or mon as think then it should show up if it's going to. I feel so anxious about it as if it fails I know it's back to the beginning again !

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waitingimpatient · 04/03/2016 12:05

But at least if it is I suppose I know what I'm doing and how I can make some possible improvements with another cycle (trying to be positive)

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Indecisivejo · 04/03/2016 14:54

To be honest I really don't think there's anything you can do to change the outcome of it. If it's meant to be it will be. I rested loads last time, watched what I ate etc and didn't work!

waitingimpatient · 04/03/2016 15:16

Yes same here ! Everything looked perfect-great lining, top quality embryo etc and I rested and ate well. It didn't work. This time I was meant to have two transferred but only one thawed and it was the lower quality embryo although I've heard so many times that it only takes one and that lower quality embryos can still make beautiful babies so I'm keeping that thought in mind!
At least there's a chance however small of a bfp. It's just the waiting.... I hate it I want to know but not long now !
Trying to keep busy I've been going for nice walks etc hopefully that will help blood flow too and maybe help who knows !

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Indecisivejo · 04/03/2016 15:28

It's the waiting that's the killer isn't it! At least when u know u can deal with it as best u can! I don't want to act preg cos if I'm not I'll feel even worse but at same time I don't want to act not preg either cos I'm aware I do need to be more careful not to overdo things etc so it's a very hard balance!

Indecisivejo · 05/03/2016 12:11

U ok waiting?

waitingimpatient · 05/03/2016 12:21

Yes not too bad thanks

Having a day trying to relax and stuff to take my mind off the next few days and what it may/may not bring
Hope you are ok too

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Indecisivejo · 05/03/2016 12:36

Ok good, just checking.
I'm just the same lol, at least it's the weekend so my fiancé is home to help with the pressure a bit.
Are u testing tomorrow?

waitingimpatient · 05/03/2016 12:46

Yes I will be, have a first response early test
Are you going to test early or wait till your test day?

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Indecisivejo · 05/03/2016 13:51

I have everything crossed for u please let me know.
I'm waiting :( lol

waitingimpatient · 06/03/2016 02:24

Had to get up so did a test as it's been hours since I went to the loo

BFN Sad

I know it's still technically early but I'm sure it's the correct result. I'm 9dp2dt so should see something if it had worked. No hint of a second line at all Sad
I'll test again Monday as have a test left but looks like it hasn't worked again this time for us

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waitingimpatient · 06/03/2016 02:29

I'm sure this is a problem with egg/embryo quality Sad

My lining was fine
Embryo although grade two (not too grade like last time) was 5 cells and looked ok
Used embryo glue
TSH level was fine
I've been on steroids cyclogest aspirin and clexane
I just can't see what it could be apart from egg/embryo quality Sad

Ordered 'it starts with the egg' and some supplements to see if they help next time. Obviously won't stop my meds im on now till wed when I have blood results but I'm sure that's it this month

It's so unfair Sad

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Indecisivejo · 06/03/2016 07:50

Oh no waiting I'm so sorry! I'm not gonna try and make u feel better by saying this n that because I know how u feel and no words can help but as u said it is still early and I would still hang on even a little hope until otd. Wish there were words to soothe and heal I really do but for now here's a big X
Oh and I've never heard of embryo glue!!!

waitingimpatient · 06/03/2016 08:12

Thankyou indecisive I just feel so deflated Sad

I told myself this time a year ago that it would work and by now was sure id have a baby or at least be pregnant. Yet nothing and I think by building it up in my head my disappointment is greater

I know it's early I'll test again tomorrow but really feel like I did back in October when FET failed then

Embryo glue is meant to help implantation I had read loads about it. Clearly it's not that great, I might try and find out from those who have had success if they used it or not

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Indecisivejo · 06/03/2016 08:52

This is all just so draining isn't it, physically and emotionally it just takes everything u have! It's all the mind thinks about, lives revolve around it etc! You may feel ok for while then something triggers it again like seeing a pregnant belly or a newborn baby :( the worse thing is when the parent/s are not the most deserving if you know what I mean!
Anyway keep your chin up and give yourself a break, do things that you're not allowed to do when ttc or preg (not just yet obv just incase) but after that.
Have you had any other investigations to look at your womb or blood tests to check hormones etc? I had to have an op (can't remember name) but was to check my womb was ok and had to have loads of blood tests even ones to check my compatibility with my partner, chromosome test or something?! This was all after my free goes were over and I hadn't had success (although first cycle was but was ectopic) so we went self funding and had all these tests. I can't get preg naturally because I've had both Fallopian tubes removed after 2 ectopics but everything else seems fine, sometimes there's just no reason for it to not work it's just one of those things :(

waitingimpatient · 06/03/2016 09:34

Yes had a lot of tests, womb lining biopsy etc. I do have issues with pcos endo and had scarring from infections

Only problem seems to be though with IVF my thyroid problems and implantation

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waitingimpatient · 06/03/2016 09:53

Fingers crossed next time I can get some blastocysts too

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Indecisivejo · 06/03/2016 11:08

I have thyroid problems too and the docs can't get my dose right even now! Hace to have tests every 2-3 months.
I only got to blastocyst stage once.

waitingimpatient · 06/03/2016 11:36

I am meant to keep TsH between 1-2 and have been on varying doses of Levothyroxine. I also have thyroid antibodies and a family history of autoimmune problems that's why they gave me all the immune stuff this cycle

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Shellster52 · 06/03/2016 21:47

Indecisivejo, it's Monday 7.3.16 here, so assuming your blastocyst was 5 days old on the day of your transfer, and assuming you have a textbook 28 day cycle where you ovulated at day 14, that would make today day 29 of your cycle and the first day of your missed period!!!! But I know the clinics always seem to say to test a few days later just to make sure the result is absolutely correct. When is your official test date?

waiting, I am so sorry. Having had 11 IVF attempts, I know that as Indecisivce says, there really are no words that I can say that can make it feel any less horrid than it does. I too remember feeling that each birthday and each christmas was another year that passed without success. I turned 38 during my 11th IVF cycle so I too desperately felt that time was running out. But it does sound like you are exactly like me in that (after my initial food and alcohol binge!), I would look up practical things that could have gone wrong that cycle and would see what practical things I could change for the next cycle.

This is just my personal feeling and of course you have to do what is best for you, but I wonder if pumping your body with Aspirin, Clexane and Cyclogest and putting your bodies delicate balance of hormones out of whack and doing more harm than good. I was a poor responder and started self medicating with Aspirin, thinking that thinner blood equals more blood to my ovaries and hopefully a better response. After a few months, my usually regular cycles started going haywire. Then when I took it during an IVF cycle, despite having 16 follicles at day 2, only 3 of them grew which the Dr thought was very unusual and couldn't explain, until I confessed I was taking Aspirin! So it doesn't just thin the blood - in my case it definitely interferes with my hormones. I am not personally familiar with Clexane and Cyclogest but you may remember blue on here who got a BFP on her first cycle than sadly ended in m/c. She then started those meds too and did another 4 IVF cycles but despite having two embryos that had made it all the way to blast transferred each time, she did not get a BFP again. So it really made me worry that the meds were the cause. I went for a walk with a fellow patient from my IVF clinic who had the same experience - m/c at 10 weeks after first IVF which biopsy showed due to downs syndrome, added meds and did several more transfers that were all BFN. I have not done research on these meds and maybe for my three stories, you have another 3 that might show the opposite result, but I just really worry and wouldn't want this to be the cause of another BFN as I know how heartreaking it is. So perhaps it's no harm to at least ask the clinic or research if it can do any harm?

I guess in your case, it's hard to know if it was an implantation issue or if the embryo didn't even make it to become a blastocyst in the first place as I think in the IVF lab, only about 20% of embryos survive that far. The one thing I personally drew great hope from was the studies online that showed eating a high protein (greater than 25% of daily intake) increased the number of embryos that survived to blast to 50% and increased the IVF pregnancy success rate to 60%. When carbs were also reduced to less than 40% of daily intake, the pregnancy rate went up to 80%. Unlike the meds which are controversial, there is no harm in eating healthy and I was very obsessive, weighing my food and entering it all into a website to make sure my percentages were within range. But it felt like it gave me something practical and pro-active to do while I waited for another IVF cycle, since the diet needed to be done for two months prior to an IVF cycle. My last IVF cycle produced only 2 embryos, but both were top quality at day 3 and one took. So the percentages proved true that 50% of my embryos survived to blast (one out of my two embryos) and that I did have preg success.

Thinking of you xox.

waitingimpatient · 06/03/2016 22:06

Thank you shellster

I have felt that it was a lot of medication but thought this cycle we would go with what the clinic recommended, much like last time when I wasn't sure about the aspirin. I've done what they've said twice now and no luck
I do however think the embryos are not surviving. I felt initially they rushed to freeze on day 2 and one on day three due to a huge drop off from 16 eggs and I think they just wanted something in the freezer.
The fact two transfers haven't worked and one embryo didn't survive thawing makes me wonder. I've read that after day 3 it can be due to sperm issues ? Something to do with different genes taking over from day 3 (I'm not sure)! But dh was unwell shortly before our cycle and had some kind of infection or twisting and was in agony and had antibiotics so I wonder if there was a problem with the sperm?
I feel sometimes that the clinic just recommended that protocol after a failed cycle to make you feel like things have been changed. I haven't even had Immunes done I just have thyroid antibodies and family history of autoimmune problems and implantation failure

I'm hoping a new cycle will provide better quality embryos. I can see the logic behind less drugs but I think now I'm so anxious about this thyroid antibody thing that I worry I'll cause failure by not taking them. Part of me would love to just be brave enough to only have the cyclogest and be brave enough to just see what happens.

The protein diet sounds very interesting, that is something I think I will definitely do. I've also ordered some supplements to take in the hopes of improving things (ubiquinol and inositol).

I think the most difficult thing for me is that I didn't think I'd be here, a year on without a baby and not pregnant. I set myself up for a fall being convinced it would work and now I feel awful. I don't know how you found the strength to keep going as its so draining and heartbreaking. Financially too it's such a struggle and we've had to increase a credit card again in anticipation of another cycle.
What did you take in your last cycle was it just the progesterone ?

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