The hut of gl/doom: ttc against the odds

[PhoenixFromTheFlames]

This is a safe haven for those ttc with difficult, with ?sub-fertility or sub-fertility labels. Where like minded people offer encouragement at times and commiserations at others.
I've decided the theme is Cocktail style: Flanagans. With a pink neon sign: Cocktails and dreams. Blinkity blink.
Newbies are welcome. Come share your tales of woe

Yup I think luck is evading us playing silly games!

No, no IUI for me as there would be no point, the egg has already gone nevermind im sure AF will be here right on que 14 days from Friday... Nurse is doing a blood test on Friday so I'm assuming that they think ov happened Friday ish that's 7 days so maybe next Friday well see its anyones guess these days!

Carrie are you waiting for HSG?
I have to wait for the lap and dye because my Consultant wanted me to wait three months to see if I get pregnant again having had the chemical pregnancy.

maybeBBaby I do cp too, and often find a small amount of blood on the cervix a couple of days before AF arrives. The month I was pregnant I had implantation bleed but it was different. Like EWCM but very pink. I also noticed a big difference in the position and shape of my cervix.

pink fingers crossed for you this month.

Still feel down this morning. I would like to phone my Cons this month and ask them to bring my lap forward but he's been so awkward so far I don't think he'll go for it. I just find this waiting so hard. I'm 37 this year and feel like time is slipping away from me...

You both do what now? What on earth is Cp?

I have googled it. I'm really suprised. I want so much to have a child but think that's a step too far. Sorry if I am upsetting anyone its not my intention. Everyones different and I don't want to cause offense but I think its a worrying sign when you start giving yourself internal examinations.
I would have thought with medical advances and ovulation tests that it wouldn't be necessary. There's no reason I can see that would mean you need to know the position of your cervix. If you even think you might be pregnant then I wouldn't advise it at all.
Sorry if this seems long winded and ranty I'm just gobsmacked

Really? I find it really helpful in conjunction with looking at cm and especially when I chart..in fact if I'm getting lots of cm sometimes cp is the only way I know if I am fertile or not. I suppose I'm just not bothered about checking it. I never got on with opks myself. I'm not exactly squeamish being a nurse and all.

I dont know if i do it correctly, i simply note on my app the height and texture / openess of my area, i have not been doing so long, but it helps the app to be more accurate. Its often dp who tells me after sex as he has noted it during foreplay. I don't think its any more unnatural or whatever than anything other steps one can take in the process to combat infertility, in not sure i will do it regularly or am even doing it correctly but don't find touching myself like that to be weird. Maybe its just me? I plan to start OPKs this month but there are studies which state that with PCO and PCOS these are mot always accurate as it affects your hormones, which is why i also record CM, cm and cp ate said to be more reliable for those of us with hormonal issues. And it helps me feel like im getting to grips with knowing what and when is normal for me

Phoenix and queen if you have any pointers for me on wht i should be looking for ( i believe high soft and open?) then im
Grateful to recieve!

Pink ive been thinking of you all day on and off and im thinking (and hoping) that the whole follicle escape will be a lovely quirk of fate leading to natural conception, thats my wish anyway! Gives me hope and sense in this crazy and seemingly unfair world!!

Oh and queen i would ask, and ask why not if denied! At least then you know and im of the feeling that it cant hurt! Altho patience (along with temperance, and many other things!) is not my fortè!!

I think if you were to ask a random test of 100 people you would get the good majority of people thinking that its a step too far. I don't think I am alone on this one.
How many signs do you need that your ovulating? There's other ways such as the tests, charting and temp with are far more effective and less intrusive.
I know this is my personal opinion and won't make me popular. I just think that maybe in the desire to become a parent that its possible to get lost in what is considered normal and not normal and sometimes a step back is in order

Opks are expensive and as ive said not reliably compatible with my issue. Im not confident in what to look for other than ewcm so i thought id have a go. Im not abnormally obsessed with having a child i have one, im just giving myself more options as i am Not fortunate enough to have even vaguely regular cycles or ovulation. The x in 100 thing isnt really representative but if 3 confirmed people on this thread do it it cant be so odd. Id understand if it were more i intrusive but stick a finger up my own fanjo doesnt bother me less intrusive than an internal
Smear or coil removal thats how i see it

OPK's don't work for me at all, and when i tried temping my chart was all over as I'm sometimes woken early by DH when he gets up - so it was no use for seeing what was happening at all.
I check my cp maybe twice mid cycle, and once a couple of days before AF is due. My cervix is very easy to find and it takes literally three seconds to do.

I guess we all have different relationships with our bodies. I've gone from being the sort of girl who was mortally embarrassed at having a smear to not batting an eye while the radiologist spent 20 mins doing what she needed to do for the HSG.
Sorry if we've grossed you out carrie.

Except the others are done my a medical professional. I'm sorry but it isn't normal and I will leave the group as I don't want to upset people.
I am quite happy to take a more subtle approach and leave foreplay for me and my partner to enjoy. We like a little romance and a bit of kinky stuff but checking my cervix no way lol

I'm a little as to why you are so offended by this? I'm not sure what you think we're all doing...

It is my body. Why should I not want to understand it thoroughly. I wanted to fall pregnant naturally, but it's not happening and the whole damn thing has become so medicalised that I'm reclaiming my womanhood as far as I can by getting to know my body.
There's nothing abnormal about it at all....

Horses for courses he doesn't stop mid action though more of a passing comment after. Im not offended per se i just wonder why it bothers you what I to my privates? I don't think its abnormal, no
Different to masterbation just a different aim. I like romantic sex as much as the next gal just not all the time, sexual predilection isnt something i thought id end up discussing here though saying gal and privates in one post surely thats offensive ha

Queen whilst you're about, am i on the right premise (high soft open = good)?

Seriously you'll leave the thread because some of us check our cervixes? To me, it's just additional information to add to my fertile signs.
Cheap opks never gave me a positive and we simply can't afford the expensive ones or a clear blue monitor, especially if you're talking about month after month I mean, we've been ttc for over two years!
I can't say DH has intentionally felt my cervix during but I have no major issues with those who do.
If the idea of it horrifies you that much and you can't stay on this thread, then by all means leave. But if otherwise you find the thread supportive and encouraging, think seriously before you leave.

yes maybeBBaby of course we're all different but it will move higher up, maybe further backwards, and should feel softer.
The general description for when it's low and hard is that it feels a bit like pushing the cartlidge at the end of your nose...
Because I've already had a child I can definitely tell when mine is open.

ive made dp seem a weirdo now havent i?! Oops! Its one of those comments that needs contextualising but it honestly wasnt as of odd as it sounds

Xpost, thanks queen im glad i had it right

Firstly carrie I don't think you should leave the group it's an opinion and as it goes I don't do it either although I do know some people do it and it helps them... I tried once and whether I didn't do it right or didn't know what I was looking for I don't know but I haven't done it since (mainly also because my body never does as it's told and I wouldn't have a clue what is normal or not down there) its not that I'm offended it is a medical suggestion for charting ovulation as it goes I don't temp or chart at all just one weekly hospital checks/internal scans and blood tests the doctors/consultants/nurses can tell me what I need to know... Also finds it takes some of the stress away too I can barely cope now let alone if I was charting/temping/checking cp I think I'd go made plus with the hours I work I just don't have the time nor the energy and it's not the first thing I think in the morning...(always sleep through alarm so focus pretty much on making it to work on time )

Thanks maybe me to fingers crossed just mega shocked it actually went... Blood test on Friday to check if I did ov or whether it was an empty follicle and yet another disappointing cycle!

Sorry if it's a long post things where getting a bit heated... I think the ttc thing is already so personal and defeating people do what they think best

Smile everyone tomorrow's another day... Luck might just return from its holidays

in all the excitement I forgot to say - AF put in a proper appearance today and I have quit my volunteering position.
Tomorrow I am going to watch crap DVD's, do some knitting and eat my bodyweight in chocolate

queen that is pants! Altho dvds and choc sounds nice!

Sorry to hear about af Q :(
Why did you quit the volunteering? Was it the ongoing issues you'd mentioned before?
I'm enjoying being on holiday with DH. Tis beautiful here in Llandudno. Climbed 2/3 of Snowdon top third looked too dangerous!
Waiting for af to arrive at weekend. Boobs big and sore and I'm super emotional. Only time will tell.

Yes phoenix that's part of it. I just wasn't enjoying it, to the point of the night before thinking 'i've got to waste a day tomorrow, I really don't want to go'....I guess if you are giving up your free time to volunteer then it ought to be something you are enjoying and gaining something positive from. I feel a little sad because some of the people were lovely. I dreaded every encounter with my immediate manager too, as you never knew how she was going to be with you. I sat with the senior manager yesterday to tell her I wasn't going back and she was an absolute star. She didn't try to change my mind, was genuinely concerned about my personal well being and not surprised by some of the reasons I gave her as far as 'personnel' issues were concerned.

Sounds like you are having a lovely holiday. DH birthday today but he's at work, he's taken tomorrow off instead so we'll have a lovely day together.

Phoenix holiday sounds lovely! A lovely part of the world too i love wales!

Queen i agree to volunteer you should at least be happy giving up your time,and definitely not feel pressured!

I still have no AF i really wish my crazy body would give me an answer!