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Original poster

back to work 5 days after c-section

162 replies

Gorionine · 07/01/2009 09:27

She IS back at work today!

It was comfirmed in the French news this morning (RTL Radio) that she was indeed due back to work this afternoon.

Anyone thinking that it is not really serving the cause of women (asside from not being a very good idea medically) or am I out of order? I am not quite sure what she is trying to achieve as her reasons is not likely to be "because she needs the money" which I could probably undertand better, although it would still sadden me thad she'd have to.

OP posts:
taliac · 07/01/2009 14:50

Oh god, I was sending work texts from hospital the day after my 2nd c/s.

I'm self employed, no maternity cover, and I hadn't ahem, quite finished everything before my hospital date (I always got my homework in late at school too!) Plus DD2 slept a lot that first few days and I was bored and high on pain medication.

Was probably the last work I did for a few months though! Its very different once you're home and the realities of a newborn set in.

Sunshinesmith · 07/01/2009 16:10

Yay, surely this is a bit tough for the little baby when she can afford both especially when she can be at home with the little one egally and money wise .
Gosh! I am a working mum but gosh, never heard anyone going back to work so quick!

I would be worried about the needs of the little baby that just arrived to this world!

alicecrail · 07/01/2009 16:34

I'm afraid i was mucking out my horses within a week of c section, i needed to get outside (and dh wasn't doing it properly )but i recovered very quickly. There is no way any employer would get me working for them that soon, even if baby had just "popped" out! No job is that important, i can't understand women who don't need to work, working right up to day they pop, then back in 6 weeks and paying a nanny to be the mother. I understand there are some that have to, but the ones that don't....

MrsArchieTheInventor · 07/01/2009 16:46

I say congratulations and jolly good for her!

Personally I've just started maternity leave, a full 18 days before junior is due, and I intend to take as much time off afterwards as I need. I don't know how I'll feel in a month, two months, six months, and will take each day as it comes. And before anyone presumes that DP and me must be well off, as a temp I'm only entitled to maternity allowance and we will only just be able to survive (and I really do mean survive) on DP's salary.

Each to their own but the world shouldn't begrudge women for taking a year+ off after having a baby or berate those who return to work the next day. It would be nice if we could all do whatever felt right but so many factors (mainly financial) encourage us to return sooner than we wanted or on hours that we'd prefer were less.

chipmonkey · 07/01/2009 17:00

Well, a woman who's out-Xenia'd Xenia!

I did hear of a woman in Ireland years ago who ran a shop. She told staff at the hospital, "You look after him" and went home to mind the shop. She came back for him 3 days later.

beforesunrise · 07/01/2009 17:05

alicecrail, you don't understand? let me put it to you differently... would you vote for a male minister who could at any point take 6 months off? prob not. sadly this is one of the reasons why people are so reluctant to trust women in childbearing age with positions of responsibility- i seem to remember this was raised against the (utterly despicable) Sarah Palin, as in what if she gets pregnant again and needs time off we cannot have her as VP!

for someone in a position of power and responsibility as this particular woman is, it would be unthinkable to step down for more than a week or two. does she need to work? imo, yes. maybe not financially, but she is running the country's justice system, so there are bigger considerations. should she have not conceived this baby? should she have aborted? should she have stepped down? or should she try and "have it all" (horrible sentence), no doubt at a serious physical and psychological cost to herself?

we need to be able to transcend these petty considerations if women are to be taken seriously and equally.

I wouldn't make her choices- but then i am not as successful as her, so i wouldn't need to.

Sycamoretree · 07/01/2009 17:11

alicecrail on Wed 07-Jan-09 16:34:52 "paying the nanny to be the mother"

extreme to that.

I can't be bothered to kick this one off - anyone else with enough energy? Where to bloody start....

alicecrail · 07/01/2009 18:42

Sorry to upset anyone, its just an "aquaintence" shall we say of mine, has got my feather's ruffled about this topic. Thinks I am letting myself and dd down because i didn't go back to work and was better for dc to have a nanny that is qualified and experienced in bringing up children to do it
beforesunrise, i see your point on that one, it is a hard one. Again no offense meant just get a bit wound up about people having kids when no intention of doing actual "parenting" iyswim

Sycamoretree · 07/01/2009 18:52

Ok, will back off but hiring a nanny does not = not being prepared to parent, just for the record!

beforesunrise · 07/01/2009 19:06

alice, your acquaintance is an idiot but your reaction is not hugely enlightened if you don't mind me saying. working mums, even successful working mums, even working mums who go back to work 5 days after giving birth have every intention of doing lots of actual "parenting" (why the brackets anyway?).

my nanny looks after my children when i am at work, and sometimes also when i am not so i can get other stuff done. I am still my children's mother, and i do plenty of parenting i can assure you.

i am sure you don't mean any offense- and i am not offended. i know it is incredibly hard for women to feel comfortable with this kind of choices and the natural reaction is to criticise anyone who doesn't follow your same approach... this is always my instinct too- but then i rationalise, and rationally we need to respect each other's choices.

we need women like RD to smash that glass ceiling, so that we can all benefit from that. She has made and will make lots of sacrifices in order to hang on to her position, and be a mother to her child.

LittleBella · 07/01/2009 19:49

i suppose no-one complained when Blair and Brown went back to work within 5 days or whatever it was

OTOH if I were a baby I wouldn't want Blair or Brown hanging around my cot...

LittleBella · 07/01/2009 19:52

Mind you, they hadn't had major surgery

I just think she's taking a big risk and needs a rest. I remember seeing some programme about some woman who had surgery (not ceasarean, something else) and felt absolutely fine within a week. She did some ironing (I'm sure it was, hence my fixation on it) and it caused some kind of rupture. She felt absolutely fine and no-one noticed anything was wrong until she fainted. Was rushed to hospital where she died. V. frightening and made me realise you should take things like major surgery seriously.

alicecrail · 07/01/2009 19:53

I think i may have put it badly, i have no problem with nanny's as nanny's, if that makes sense, i have a few friends who have nannies and also some who are nannies. My point is that some do fob their kids off to nannies, grandparents, friends etc when they have no good reason. I do think its possible to have it all, but perhaps not at the same time. There is part of me that is in awe of her but part of me feels sorry that she cant enjoy just having her baby. Did she go back because she really wanted to get back out there or did she feel pressured? I know i will never be as important so will never know that kind of pressure. I also know i am very lucky only having to work one half day a week. I am also know that being a sahm does not make you a good parent

chipmonkey · 07/01/2009 22:53

One of my neighbours was hanging washing out on her line 3 weeks after her CS and her scar ruptured!
I never iron anyway, MIL does it for us because she is at the ideas of the ds's being in creased pyjamas!

naturalbornmum · 07/01/2009 23:26

I feel a bit lazy after reading this, I am hoping to have a vaginal birth and I was thinking that I would not do a lot but bond with my baby for at least the first few days, prehaps a week.....

And my DH is having 3 weeks off.

AuldAlliance · 08/01/2009 10:59

What I find a little aggravating about it is that RD tends to be touted as a model for various groups here (immigrants, women, single mothers, etc.) and the way this is being presented suggests that we should be following her example. While she's free to make her choices, I don't see why they need to be trumpeted around as if others should follow her lead.
I think, given attitudes to babies amongst many professionals here, it is unthinkable highly unlikely that her baby is going to work/meetings, etc. with her in Cabinet and at her Ministry, and it is a bit sad that a mother who spends so little time with her newborn child is being held up as an example. The cynical side of me is now waiting for the gvmt to announce that they're cutting maternity leave because it's clearly an expensive luxury.
I know she's fighting to stay Garde des Sceaux, but a) if she handled things better she might come in for less flak and b)she'll hardly be down at the Job Centre once she does get re-shuffled out. Taking a week or two wouldn't change much, and would allow her time to figure out, from the comfort of home, how to carry out the sweeping changes to the legal system her dictator mentor boss is now announcing.

mm22bys · 08/01/2009 11:12

I certainly do not admire her. CS are major operations, what is wrong with taking time out to recover and bond? I doubt she is bf the baby.

It does nooone any favours, especially the baby, to do what she is doing.

mrshammond · 08/01/2009 11:32

Agree with mm22bys - what is she hoping to prove?

If her scar ruptures internally she couild bleed to death - then a child will be left without a mother.

What is so desperately wrong with taking time to get to know your baby and letting your body heal?

BonsoirAnna · 08/01/2009 11:35

AA - she got completely slated on Europe 1 this morning as being totally out of sync with modern French feelings about the importance of maternity leave - her enthusiasm to return to work so soon won't have won her many fans and she isn't being held up as a good example for that... on the contrary.

AuldAlliance · 08/01/2009 11:49

Tant mieux, Anna (have you changed name?)

jujumaman · 08/01/2009 11:50

mm22bys

Not many women in France bf, as one french friend told me in horror when I asked her if she intended to "Mais no, my breasts are for my 'usband."

Rachida Dati doesn't have an 'usband of course

I am in the I had my last CS 19 months ago but haven't ironed/done heavy cleaning since in case I rupture brigade . Better safe than sorry, I tell my husband

BonsoirAnna · 08/01/2009 12:10

Oui

Bonne Année

wasabipeanut · 08/01/2009 12:15

Jesus those rupture stories are scary. I think part of the problem is that the combination of paracetomol/brufen and if youre lucky codeine are so shit hot that you feel absolutely fine.

I got a little bit cavalier about a week after my cs and felt something sort of "twang" in that area. I stopped taking my painkillers afterwards because I figured it was making me take risks. Yes, it was a bit sore at times but it forced me to rest. I basically spent all day lying on the sofa bfing which was lovely.

beforesunrise · 08/01/2009 12:44

good article in the guardian

AuldAlliance · 08/01/2009 12:44

Bonne Année! (italics not working again)
Maybe this year we'll manage a Paris meet-up... DS2 is due on April 15th, so any time after the 20th I'll be able to hop on the TGV and swan up to Paris, obviously .

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