Guardian article on SAHMs

[branflake81]

here

If that's the definition of "shitwork", there is a lot of it about and I'm not sure it's all or mostly domestic. Millions of people are employed in dull, repetitive, invisible jobs.

cleaning toilets and changing nappies is, literally, shitwork though, isn't it?

True enough but women aren't paid for a lot of the shitwork they do.

No-one in our household ever complained about changing nappies (all in the past now) - it's rather sweet changing a nappy, I think.

And just how dirty do your toilets get? It's really not very difficult to clean a loo. Rather that than ironing any day....

There's a book called "Fascinating Womanhood" which says that the way to enjoy domestic stuff is to do it whole-heartedly. So no rushing through the laundry at top speed so you have time to have a sneaky gin before Loose Women, savour the washing, sort it lovingly into little piles, weave a laundry basket out of your own hair & fingernails, etc.

I think that if the definition of shitwork were that it was invisible and unpaid - well, there's none in our house

Beautiful - is ther another way?

My mum returned to education when I was 9, along with my dad. The child care was just that - we looked after eachothere but my mum got the bulk of the housework. When both my pts were working (when I was about 12) us kids pretty much knew how to cook for ourselves, did all our own washing, ironing etc

I never felt my mum returning to work had a negative impact but I know she still got left with the bullk of the childcare. I don't think we ever had babysitters.

BEAUTIFUL - that's the same with any job - if you want to get satisfaction, it needs to be done well and with thought (which requires some investment of self).

That weirdo Flylady is a bit like that. A sort of fetishising of housework.

Yes but it isn't a job.

Housework isn't a job?

I don't think it is, no.

Of course it is (unless you are really weird and do it for entertainment value....)

I use the term "job" to describe work done for money. I don't call tending my garden a job. But if I charged £100 an hour for taking care of someone else's garden that would be a job.

Anna- changing nappies must be well and truly in the past for you if you remember it as sweet

if you ever want to indulge your nostalgia you are welcome to come and sort out DD2's stinkers- she is teething and has recently discovered spaghetti....

I never minded nappies either.

it's not that hard :O
at the very most it's a part-time job.

The definition of a job is not paid employment, even though paid employment is frequently referred to as a job.

In our household there is a huge long list of regular jobs that have to be done in order to keep our family functioning:

• food shopping
• clothes washing
• ironing
• putting bins out
• cleaning windows
• etc

Some of those jobs we do ourselves and some we subcontract to third parties. Those we do in-house and those we subcontract change from time to time. They all remain jobs, whether or not they are done by family members or paid third parties. Value is attached to completing those jobs well.

nfk, if a woman stays at home and runs the home while her husband goes out to vwork & pays all the bills, surely he is effectively paying her to run his home? Without him, she'd have to do all that domestic stuff anyway and find money to pay for the roof over her head.

Seriously, I don't mind it at all. But neither do I mind it being described as shitwork.

Sorry, am waffling now. Need to go to bed.

Is he? Some men might see it like that. And some couples might see their relationship like that. But most people don't want a boss/employee model for their marriage/partneship.

As a very convinced feminist, I cannot possibly condone the use of the word "shitwork" for domestic chores when those chores are largely performed by women.

Those chores are valuable - vital, even - for people to continue with their daily lives.

My partner is the breadwinner; I am the boss

Vital, yes. Shitty, yes.
And often "contracted out", including by SAHMs.

It's not a comment on the value of the person doing the job, but on the nature of the task itself.

Surely nobody actually enjoys cleaning a loo.