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Neighbour screaming abuse at her kids

99 replies

dawnie1 · 19/11/2004 17:35

We had new neighbours move in about 6 months ago, initially all seemed fine with them but the kids seemed very withdrawn and quiet. Recently the mother has been screaming the most horrendous stuff at her 2 children. She has a daughter of 10 years and a boy of 7 years. It started with the odd row - no swearing or verbal abuse just shouting but has now escalated into every morning and night, it goes on for atleast 20 mins and she says the most awful things- example at 7:30 this morning she burst into her daughters room (next to ours) and screamed 'I f...ing hate you, I hate you you little bi..., I wish I'd had an abortion, you are disgusting' and this type of things happends so regularly now - she then went into her sons room and screamed the same at him !!??!! Poor, poor children . I know that she has just been signed off work for 6 weeks for depression because she cannot cope with having the house decorated - she has freely admitted to me that she is obsessed with her house being immacualately tidy but FGS her poor children. Last week she was seen running out of her house after her 7 year old son with a tennis racket to hit him, later after she had calmed down she explained that he had lay down on her bed after she had spent at least 10 minutes making it-FGS - I can't understand it. I don't know what to do, if anything, but those poor children ??????? HELP, any advise would be greatly apreciated.

OP posts:
jarmat · 20/11/2004 10:39

You definately have done the right thing here, for the kids and the mother. Dont beat yourself up about this, you have done what anyone hopefully would have done in this situation, thought about the happiness & safety of those children

merlot · 20/11/2004 10:44

Well Done Dawnie . Had to catch up on this thread from last night and was really about all that has happened.

And I echo the others...you did the right thing at the right time (you didn't want to make things worse). This woman is making a public cry for help and you have taken the first step in helping her

cockle · 20/11/2004 10:45

Dawnie, I just came across this thread. How horrible. WELL DONE on your actions - you've done absolutely the right thing. Please let us know what happens. I do hope these children get the protection they need - please keep chasing the NSPCC etc if you feel they're still in danger. Unfortunately, as so many news stories over recent years have shown, cases like this sometimes slip through the authorities' net and the results can be tragic.

munnzieb · 20/11/2004 10:47

well down dawnie, theres nothing more you can do now except to watch out for the children and make them know you are there if they need you. Fingers crossed nothing more will happen to them.

ks · 20/11/2004 10:48

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dawnie1 · 20/11/2004 11:54

There was no more shouting last night or this morning. The dad has taken the kids out, they have been gone since about 9:30am. I dropped a note in next door to the mum saying 'please don't think that I'm a nosey neighbour but bearing in mind what happened last night I feel I should let you know that I am here if you need to talk, shout or scream. Everybody finds it very difficult every now and again, Please dont think that I am judging you or trying to push unwanted advice. Its just to let you know that I will help in any way I can if you want me too. If not, then I will not mention this again'. I don't know if she will contact me but I just thought I should make an offer to help - she may well think p*ss off nosey neighbour!?!
Apparantly the Police were excellent last night, they were all very calm and the neighbour from across the road did tell them about all the stuff that has happened recently. The Police will be referring the whole matter to Social Services. The mum just sat there the whole time crying and backing up what the neighbour was saying. It really does sound like a cry for help, I don't think she is an evil person but she is definately unwell and she fully realises that.
I pray to God that the situation will start to improve now but I will be watching out to see what happens, so will the other neighbours.
The NSPCC also phoned me back today to confim everything that I said last night which I did. They also will now be taking the matter further which is good news.

OP posts:
cab · 20/11/2004 12:01

Dawnie that was a lovely thing to do and probably what the poor woman needs. The world would be a better place if we all had neighbours like you.

cockle · 20/11/2004 12:03

dawnie, I can only commend your actions. What a perfectly-worded note. I wish more people would have your courage and not be so terrified of the idea of 'interfering' when children's welfare is at stake.

You have all my sympathy and tons of admiration.

mishmish · 20/11/2004 12:05

dawnie, you've been like a guardian angel for those children

spook · 20/11/2004 12:05

Oh Dawnie. That was a really lovely thing to do. It would be all too easy to judge but this poor woman obviously really needs help. The fact that she sat there agreeing with everything when the police came just makes it sadder.
I really hope she takes you up on your offer coz you sound like an angel.

PuffTheMagicDragon · 20/11/2004 12:10

Dawnie, you are a good neighbour. Poor lady and children. You've done everything you can now and extended a hand of friendship and support.

golds · 20/11/2004 12:31

It breaks my heart to think of any child having to go through this, you did the right thing, I hope the whole family get the support they deserve and are OK.

Slinky · 20/11/2004 12:44

Dawnie

You are an absolute star! You've bought tears to my eyes this morning.

Kept thinking about you and your neighbours last night.

ks · 20/11/2004 13:20

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ScummyMummy · 20/11/2004 13:23

I think sending the note round was a lovely thing to do, Dawnie. And well done for biting the bullet and ringing the NSPCC too. You're a star.

winnie1 · 20/11/2004 13:39

Dawnie, I too think you have done the right thing and I too think that dropping a note through her door was a kind thing to do. Lets hope she gets the help she needs, her husband realsies how serious things are and the children are protected.

merlot · 20/11/2004 13:43

Well Done - Note was an excellent idea

Twiglett · 20/11/2004 14:21

Just caught up with this .. BRAVO Dawnie you've done everything right IMO especially the note

I hope the mum gets help .. she sounds so in need of it .. poor woman and poor children

turquoise · 20/11/2004 14:24

Just seen this. Fantastic note Dawnie, well done you. Hopefully this family will get some help and support now.

Marina · 20/11/2004 19:08

Good for you Dawnie, you're a neighbour in a million to put that note through the door. Hope the whole family get the help they deserve - and your support is going to help them no end.

enid · 20/11/2004 19:19

words fail me. Dawnie, I wish there were more people in this world like you. x E

hunkermunker · 20/11/2004 23:33

Perfect. Dawnie, you're super. I hope she takes you up on your offer.

mykidsmum · 20/11/2004 23:42

Dawnie what you have done will no doubt make some kind of difference... you are very brave, very wise and truely wonderful. As are all the mners that have not judged this woman but recognised how ill she must be, I expected lots of anger but what I have seen on here has truley warmed my heart, lots of women empathising with a very difficult time for both mum and kids, what a privilidge it is to be amongst such wonderful women xxx Lets hope they all are given the helkp they need to improve their situation xx

ks · 20/11/2004 23:47

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