I am so sick of all the rubber-necking that has been going on with regard to a recent and tragic news topic.

[Bubble99]

And all under the guise of 'concerned fellow-parent/s'

I met a mother at school today (never spoken to her before) who approached me and said ..'Have you heard about? What do you think about?' and the freak was almost smiling. It's as if this nightmare has become entertainment for some people.

There is a voyeuristic, collective sickness going on , safe under the umbrella of 'concerned parents.'

Yuk.

this is a soap opera.

turn your tvs on and watch eastenders instead.

or look after your own children.

I thought..that the family contacted the british media to make the case high profile, would we have heard of it otherwise.

the family has kept madelaines face in the public eye because they know that once the journalists go home & lose interest that she becomes another one of the hundreds that go missing.

It felt like they were asking for help, and we responded because we're mums (I thought) because I know that something inside me changed when I had my boy..& I don't think it was down to PND.

I've followed the case with interest & horror as I've learned more about missing children, paedophile rings, human trafficking, & the discrepancy in approach that various police have to the issue.

I'm told (quite patronisingly) by other mumsnetters that these things are very rare you know... ..but I have also now got information from other mumsnetters about organisations that I can support who try to tackle these things.

Am I a voyeur? who are you to judge me?

dywfwt - I agree that some posts on this thread are rather patronising. I am extremly interested in the plight of Madeleine and follow the case closely. I am not a voyeur. I am praying for a positive outcome. My four kids are asleep and I am intersted in the news around this case. I am certainly not rubber-necking, or not not spending enough time with my children.

Those of you posting about our mawkish behaviour and unhealthy interest in the case need to realise that you too are on here, posting (with interest), reading our posts and responding. Let's not judge each other, eh?

Good post doyouwantfries and Evanmom - totally agree. Am baffled that others don't tbh.

doyouwantfrieswiththat and EvanMom - I totally agree with you. I have read an awful lot on this over the past week - not because of mawkish or voyeuristic behaviour but to try and understand this issue. I don't mean just press articles and speculation but facts - statistics and research, often to try and see whether the more hysterical press headlines have any basis in fact. It's made me realise how naive I was.

I didn't have children when Soham happened and couldn't understand why my mother was so consumed and upset by it but I feel totally differently now. I feel very strongly about children being abused or exploited in any circumstances and whatever the conclusion to this case and whatever you think of the media reaction, it has raised the profile of missing children overall which can only be a good thing.

I still stand by what I said originally; people must be free to feel and react however they want/need to in response to this story - free from judgement by anyone.

But for me this story is starting to take on post death of Princess Diana tabloid media-esque proportions. It is just becoming too much. The Soham murders were the same too.

People are variously, shocked, appalled, distraught etc by this story but I feel the tabloid media is now blatantly seeking to manipulate what they consider should be the nations's collective response.

Everyone is entitled to their own feelings but I don't want to be manipulated by anyone into feeling anything that doesn't come naturally to me. I will decide how I feel and want to react. I refuse to be shamed, by the notion of some "appropriate" collective or shared mentality, into reacting in a certain way.

What strikes me about the postings here is that a lot of them start off with, poor Maddie, and go straight to "I am so upset, I can't sleep, I empathise, I, I, I.

It is normal to feel shock and to feel sorry for the parents and the child, but there are so many other children missing. Perhaps we should divert some of the energy used here to think of ways to prevent abductions and to find missing children of whichever nationality.

I agree with you kkk, but we have to realise that it's the British media that are keeping this story in the news now, and it IS an international incident if the child has been taken out of Portugal

Sorry if it's been mentioned before on various other threads, but I'm a new member and haven't trawled through everything yet, nor do I have time to.

A colleague recently returned from a resort in the Algarve a couple of days ago, and said there is NOTHING being publicised outside of Praia de Luz about this case.

As I read in the paper recently, this is a case of a police force only usually involved in RTA's and holidaymakers insurance claims.

As long as the media continue to keep this story in everyone's mind without any false accusation, surely it can only be a good thing?

I think I spend too much time on mumsnet and maybe some of us who get embroiled in all these portugal threads do too.
It's just an observation! But it's easy to get sucked in. My brother calls the internet a 'time sink' and I agree.
Mumsnet is wonderful for support and friendship when housebound but some of these aggressive threads just make me think people need to get out more or do something else maybe? Doesn't anyone else agree at all?
(hides under table)

Mirror headline today...

'Russian (Alleged) Pervert Questioned By Police.'

And you know how much it must have hurt them, to have to write the 'alleged.'

If this guy isn't involved, or, indeed a 'pervert,' how is he going to live this down?

The article gave the names of his parents, too.

How can they get away with stuff like that? It beggars belief.

I suppose the 'alleged' makes it legal?

Shocking, and just so wrong. Whatever happened to 'innocent until proven guilty?'

'The Russian' has said that he is innocent and that he will sue.

If he is, I hope he does.

Did you see the Sun, Mondays issue I think

"Murat liked jumping on kids bouncy castles"

Yup that makes him a paedophile

That's it wrapped up then, eh.

He lives with his mum......

Thing is. If either of these men do turn out to be involved, The Mirror is going to see it as open-season on any future suspect.

'It Woz The Mirror Wot Cracked It.'

Like those on that thread, "I knew it was him, it was his glass eye that did it for me"

BTW. Lovely to 'see' you again, WB.

there is something which I just can't fathom

and that is that the sleuths and ghouls apparently don't find their own behaviour at all odd....

I wish the media would stop reporting this now. There are no updates, and tbh I think the continued coverage and speculation is now doing more harm than good. Initially everyone felt that they wanted to know when this little girl was found, they all felt some empathy with the parents, but as this goes on more and more people seem to be feeling that this coverage of the plight of one child is completely excessive when so many thousands of children go missing every year. Everyone wants this little girl found alive, but I think it's only a very small minority who actually believe that will happen, and in the meantime people's lives are being ruined by the naming of suspects and the photographing of their children and families and broadcasting of their aledged criminal histories.

time to let it go now. The media have served its purpose, posters have been emailed, if Madeleine is ever found the media can report on it then.

There is a sense now when watching the news on sky that it is more about a load of busy bodies finding something for themselves to do rather than a serious police investigation for a missing person.I have no objection to her close friends and family starting a fund etc but all teh other stuff is pointless and crass.Let it lie until there is NEWS not speculation It would be more dignified as it is becoming more about some public campaign and less about the actual crime

And why is it that the computer etc taken away for investigation were 'siezed'not just taken

I think if I were in the McCanns' shoes I would want to feel that everything possible had been done to find my daughter, and if that meant whipping up a publicity storm, I would find a way to do it. I really admire their resourefulness and energy.

But I find it disturbing that people take this further than "I hope they find Madeleine", saying a prayer and emailing the odd poster. In particular, paying attention to the "dreams" of fantasists and wierdos and speculating on what might have happened to the poor girl is tasteless in the extreme. The fact is that if the McCanns' worst fears are realised, they will have to deal with it forever. The rest of us will feel bad for a bit and then get on with our lives. Some people seem to be attempting to "take on" some of the McCann's trauma as their own and that is just plain wierd.