"absolutely acceptable to leave a child"

[prufrock]

Has anyone else read the unbelievable story about the English couple arrested in NY because they left their 4 month old in a locked car by herself whilst they went into a shopping centre? Their defence is that the Americans have blown this out of all proportion because it is completely culturally acceptable to do this in Great Britain!

Not insulted at all

and I CERTAINLY wouldn't left a child in a car in LONDON!!!!!!!!!! We live in Herts and the crime is bad here too, but not as bad as London

which is what they must do if they feel it was ok to do in USA

Just trying to say that there may be a side to this story that means it isn't as bad as it seems. When I pop into the little shop thing the kids are usually out of sight (but won't be when I have my blue badge as I'll then be able to use the disabled space right next to the till). Obviously I try not to run out of milk but occasionally I do have to do this. I can't imagine being held up for some huge amount of time, and obviously if dh was with me he would stay in the car.

Would I do it in the States? No but then there are loads of things I wouldn't do in the States. Do you remember that case last year where a British couple were arrested for leaving their sleeping children in a hotel room- and one child woke up and wandered out of the room. They were watching fireworks and had been gone for 20 mins if I remember correctly.

Should add that I think it is slightly unfortunate that a British couple have been cited as an example of European attitudes on this, as am not sure they are typical but how many of us have been otherwise caught off-guard when on holiday and done things that perhaps we would not normally do.

Over here it is more acceptable to give kids less supervision , partly because of a lower crime rate although I personally believe there is a false sense of security. I know of a German lady who would leave her toddler asleep in his cot whilst she did the school run for her elder child , 20 mins round trip, and another(Swiss) who pops to the shops on her bike when her 1yo is asleep. How long it would be before someone realised if there was an accident, for example, I don't know. It is not possible to really generalise here though, any more than in Britain, as we were admonished by a Swiss couple for leaving ds alone for a few minutes in the car outside a Factory Outlet whilst we rounded up dd as they were both misbehaving and causing chaos inside. The car was literally outside the front door.

Please don't feel like this represents parents in Great Britain!! You could look at this many ways, it could represent Jewish parents around the world if you noticed their last names. I don't agree with what they did, but again you don't know the all of the circumstances. I would never do this with my child, she is 9 and I still can't seem to let her go to the ladies on her own. I want her to be independent and not have phobias, but I do have to mention to her that I have a fear that someone could take her away, just because she is a little person. The thought of your child being hurt or stolen brings up such strong feelings. Please don't feel that this article represents Great Britainin my mind it doesn't at allthis is the human condition. I could never have a gun in the house either and have never handled a gun, so clearly all Americans are not the same either, of course!

Yeah that's what I meant dinosaur. I just think its hard to be toto judegmental (other than to sya they were silly) without knowing all the facts or really seeing for outselves where they were etc

My mum used to leave me in my pram at the bottom of the garden - and my aunt left my cousin's- I would never do that now!

I don't for one moment condone what the couple did, but I have to admit that I find it a bit over the top that some people wouldn't even leave their child in the (locked) car on a petrol forecourt, dh and I do that all the time.

I know this might sound a bit shocking to some too, but dh and I did leave 2 year old ds in the car in Tesco car park the other week as he was fast asleep, is an absolute nightmare in Tesco anyway, even when he hasn't just woke up, and we just couldn't face the stress. (I wouldn't have done it whilst I did an entire shop btw, we only nipped ijn for a few bits).
I was slightly uncomfortable about doing it, and was mortified when they called out my car registration from the customer service desk!...he had woken up and was crying.
I don't think I would do it again.

My personal pet hate is leaving a child asleep outside your house in the pram. My mum and dad have done this with ds and I went mad. It is one thing to leave them in a locked car, but quite another to leave them so easily accessible in a pram whilst you get on with things in the house.
IMO of course...

More info here

Still stupid in my opinion but with 2 crying kids I can understand that in the heat of the moment you'd aim not to disturb the third. The lawyer's comments are the most insulting! (but isn't that always the case...)

The case of the danish woman quoted at the bottom is an interesting one... better in the car or the cigarette smoke?!

Ah dino I think that was me ! I live in a flat and had to go down the 15 or so steps to front door then another 20 or so outside to street leave to where he was dropped off the bus. Kind of the equivalent of going outside your front door if you lived in a town house. I can assure you she really was sound asleep and if I had any thought she would awaken I'd get her up and take her with me.

i remember when we used to go to pontins as kids and people used to leave babies in the chalets then there would be an annoncement...baby crying in chalet number 38 etc

oh bog
try again

My mum always remembers fondly the spot in the town I grew up in where every mother left their pram (and baby) to sleep while the moums went shopping...

In the olden days (ie when I was a baby!) babies in prams used to be left outside shops, never mind houses - no supermarkets then of course - and nobody batted an eyelid. I don't know exactly when it stopped happening - it was a gradual process, combination of supermarkets spreading and children being taken occasionally. There never used to be security on maternity wards either...

I used to leave mine in the car outside the house, visible from the kitchen, until that dreadful incident where 2 children were killed in the car .. it just burst into flames.

It is interesting, dinosaur - bit sad too. I used to cycle 3 miles to school at 11 - imagine that happening now!

I get the impression that life in NZ is still a lot like that. Maybe we should all emigrate.